"If your child accuses you of being "mean," you must have done something right. "

School Age (6-10 years)

John's Most Recent Articles

Helping a Child Worried About Death

Posted on 8/18/2020

Q: We have a five-year-old who obsesses about dying. This has been going on for six months, ever since a child in the neighborhood died of a congenital genetic condition. Our son knew the boy and...

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Time to Shake Things up When It Comes to Your Child's Education

Posted on 8/11/2020

Q: Our nine-year-old has just learned he is not going back to school on schedule in the fall. Instead, he will be doing distance learning by computer and home instruction. We had to do this for...

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Don’t Jump Down the ADHD Rabbit Hole With 8-Year-Old

Posted on 6/23/2020

Q: Our son, age 8, has been diagnosed with attention deficit disorder. His IQ is well above average but his actual performance in the classroom is problematic. He has difficulty paying attention...

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Why Small Classrooms Are Overrated

Posted on 5/5/2020

No rational person would argue that the smaller the class size, the better, right?” asked the radio talk show host. “I think I’m a rational person,” I said, “and I can offer proof...

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In Defense of Homeschooling

Posted on 4/28/2020

In his November 1863 address at Gettysburg, Abraham Lincoln proclaimed that the men who lost their lives on that battlefield had done so in order that “government of the people, by the people and...

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Father's Visitation With Child Should Be Allowed

Posted on 1/15/2020

Q: Our ten-year-old granddaughter lives with us. We have custody of her but her father, our son, is now asking us for visitation privileges. I probably don’t need to tell you that both he and his...

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Tame Child's Disruptive Behavior at Holiday Get-Togethers

Posted on 12/3/2019

Q: I’m already dreading the holidays. Our eight-year-old is a very excitable child and our family is expected to attend numerous holiday get-togethers at the homes of family members. When he’s...

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It Is Not Necessary to Help Your Child With Homework

Posted on 11/26/2019

After a recent talk in South Florida, women came up to me in droves asking, “How much should I help my children with their schoolwork?” That not one man asked the question...

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In Today's Parenting, Feelings Trump the Truth

Posted on 11/19/2019

Okay, it’s time to set the record straight, confront the gorilla in the proverbial room, call a spade a spade, and so on and so forth. I recently published a column on “The...

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Children Do Best in School When Parents Do Not Monitor Progress

Posted on 10/29/2019

The Portal. It sounds like something out of a science fiction novel, the gateway to an alternative universe that lures, then traps the unwary in its nefarious web of illusion, where things are...

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Recent Questions

It's my room

Posted 1 week ago

My 6 year old won’t allow her 3yr old brother in her room, especially if we are working on her homework. Unfortunately, there are times that I’m home alone and he needs to be with us. She try’s to...

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Actions Speak Louder Than Explanations

Posted 3 weeks ago

I have 2 questions: If a family has children of grade school age and want to begin using John's child rearing principals. What is the best way to begin? Sit the kids down and say "Things are...

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Don't Play The Lying Game

Posted 3 weeks ago

My 7-year-old daughter has begun to tell lies. She was an honest child but lately, she has been lying so much to get herself out of trouble. She has started playing with a neighbor who lies and...

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School Performance Ultimately Belongs to the Student

Posted on 8/20/2020

My son is going in the 3rd grade and so far has had great performance at school both with academics and behavior. When school went virtual in the spring, it was a horrible few months for both of...

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Books about Boys

Posted on 8/12/2020

Hi, My husband and I are going to be taking custody of a 6 year old boy whose mother is a meth addict and has exposed him to major drug use including overdose by outsiders. He is remarkably well...

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Backtalking 8-Year-Old

Posted on 8/10/2020

I have a question about the ticket system. We are using tickets to focus on talking back from our 8 year old. Often when he loses a ticket for talking back, he continues as he makes his way to...

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No Good Reason For 7-Year-Old's Threat

Posted on 7/30/2020

I got a call from our daycare provider today saying our 7-year-old told his best friend that he was going to bring in a real gun and shoot him because the friend had taken something that belonged...

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Follow through at all cost.

Posted on 7/18/2020

My daughter who is 8 years old has become accustomed to yelling and raising her voice when speaking to us her parents. We raise our voices in the house too so perhaps she gets that from us. But...

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Disrespect is Unacceptable

Posted on 7/12/2020

For our daughter's 10th birthday we let her have two friends sleepover. I asked her for a birthday dinner and breakfast request to have for the sleepover. Breakfast request was waffles with...

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What to Do About Screen Addiction?

Posted on 7/5/2020

My 11-year-old son is obsessed with screens. If we tell him to do something while he is on his phone or iPad he huffs and puffs or we are told, “in a minute." Then he only gets 2 out of 3 chores...

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