Arguments with Children
John's Most Recent Articles
‘Parenting’ vs Childrearing
Posted on 1/25/2022
I often go looking for parenting ideas that illustrate the difference between so-called “parenting” and mere childrearing. They abound. My latest find came in the form of a 2018 article on...
Read MoreFour Steps To Give Argumentative Teenager the Last Word (and Restore Sanity)
Posted on 6/8/2021
Q: My fifteen-year-old daughter is slowly driving me insane! She argues with me about everything and always wants the last word. No matter how well I explain the “why?” of a decision to her, she...
Read MoreMoodiness Is Merely a Bad Emotional Habit
Posted on 10/27/2020
Living with an emotionally dramatic child is no fun. They throw wet blankets over nearly every family gathering or outing. Little is right in their lives and attempts to cheer them up generally...
Read MoreIt Takes Two
Posted on 7/14/2017
The storm gathered upstairs while I sat reading the paper. It began as a rumbling confusion of voices, suddenly punctuated by a gruff, insistent, “GET OUTTA HERE!” Then came a piercing screech....
Read MoreTake a Time-Out Before Engaging With Argumentative Child
Posted on 11/22/2016
Q: In last week’s column, you advised parents not to argue with teenagers. That’s fine and dandy advice, John, but you failed to tell your readers how to stay out of or end these arguments. For...
Read MoreA Non-Argumentative Teen Is a Happy One
Posted on 11/15/2016
My advice to The Wall Street Journal, the only news source to which I subscribe: Stop trying to be all things to all people. Specifically, stop giving parenting advice. The latest attempt by...
Read MoreAn Example in Parenting Minimalism
Posted on 11/4/2014
Q: My 6-year-old son argues with me about everything I tell him to do. He comes up with reason after reason why he shouldn’t have to or can’t, why it’s unfair, or why, at the least, I...
Read MoreSimple Solutions
Posted on 7/29/2014
I absolutely love it when people begin to realize that the problems they’re having with a child are of their own making; when they begin to realize, in other words, that the child is not the...
Read MoreGood Parenting Decisions
Posted on 5/20/2014
Q: For the first five years of her life, it was just me and my now 13-year-old daughter. I didn’t have a clue as to what I was doing. I wasn’t consistent; I didn’t hold her accountable; I was an...
Read More"The Doctor" Makes House Calls
Posted on 4/28/2014
Shortly after I finished graduate school, a friend of mine shared with me a book called Indirect Hypnosis, written by Milton Erickson, a most unorthodox psychiatrist if ever there was one....
Read MoreRecent Questions
It's Not About the Makeup: Time for a Garden Kick
Posted on 3/20/2022
15-year old daughter very obsessed with make-up. Used our Amazon account to buy makeup Products without our knowing till I looked up order history. Took away all her makeup products, went...
Read MoreSmartphones and "Smart-mouthed" Teen
Posted on 2/18/2022
Mr. John: We need your advice. My son just turned 15 and never had video games or a smartphone. He had a flip phone, and watches Tv on weekends. This school year we gave him a Smartphone for him...
Read MoreYou're in Charge Now
Posted on 1/21/2022
Okay so I’m ready to administer a discipline plan for my daughter. My questions are; 1. How much is too much? I’m ready to take a lot of her favorite things away. But, what about life...
Read MoreParent Apologies: Choosing Relationship Over Being Right with Adult Child
Posted on 1/19/2022
This question builds off of a prior one answered by Gretchen Slover. Last summer, my 18-year-old daughter lost about 15-20 pounds. She was at about 130 at her peak and in good shape. My ex-wife...
Read MorePerfect time for a reset
Posted on 1/18/2022
Our 9yo girls currently rule the roost. They speak to us flippantly, complain constantly, whine and pester after receiving a "no" answer, expect others to fetch/carry for them, ignore directives...
Read More8-Year-Old Ruling the Roost (Follow-up)
Posted on 11/24/2021
Okay in regards to my prior question. I purchased the book. Thank you. Can you please tell me some examples of what you mean right now so I can start turning the tables ASAP! Instead of...
Read MoreBossy 4-Year-Old Not Giving Up
Posted on 10/30/2021
Four year old thinks he’s the boss. He’s physically abusive, has no respect for anyone’s sleep including his two younger brothers and is completely defiant. Everything is an argument. Once...
Read MoreWho Are You? (And what have you done with our daughter?)
Posted on 10/26/2021
Since June 2020, my daughter (who is now 14) has become someone I no longer recognize. When school was closed due to COVID-19, I made the terrible choice and let her have her phone 24/7, which has...
Read MoreDefine "Disciplined"
Posted on 9/23/2021
Whenever we have friends or family over or we’re at an event with other kids our 4 year old daughter very rarely engages in playing with the children and constantly wants to be where the adults...
Read MoreTickets, Strikes and Keeping the Peace
Posted on 6/22/2021
I’ve attempted using the ticket system, but I’m getting confused. I have a 4 yr old and 7yr old. They fight, and argue about EVERYTHING. I put 3 tickets on the fridge- no tattling, no disturbing...
Read MoreVideo
Tell
Posted on 5/16/2014
Tell: do you "Tell" your kids or do you ask, negotiate, beg, and scream.
Read MoreTopics Covered
- ADHD and other disorders
- Adoption/Foster Parent
- Aggression
- Allowances
- Alpha Speech
- Anxieties, Fears
- Arguments with Children
- Audio Files
- Bedtime/Sleep
- Bedwetting
- Bullies/Bullying
- Character/Values (teaching)
- Chores/Responsibilities
- College
- Consequences/Punishment
- Daycare/Preschool
- Depression/Self-Harm
- Developmental Issues (e.g. late talking)
- Discipline Methods (e.g. time-out)
- Disobedience/Defiance
- Divorce/Custody
- Drugs (marijuana, cocaine, etc.)
- Education
- Electronics (Computers/Video Games/Television/Cell Phones)
- Extracurricular Activities/Hobbies
- Father
- Food/Eating Problems
- Gender
- Grandparents/Grandchildren
- High School
- Homeschooling
- Homework
- John's Discipline Methods
- Learning Disabilities
- Lying
- Manners
- Marriage Issues
- Mealtime/Eating
- Miscellaneous Discipline Problems
- Miscellaneous Editorial Columns
- Mothers
- Only Children
- Pacifiers/Security Blankets/Thumbsucking
- Parent Leadership and Authority
- Play
- Preschool
- Rebellious Behavior
- Respect
- Rewards
- School Issues
- Self-Esteem
- Shyness
- Sibling Conflict
- Single Parents
- Social Issues (fighting/arguing with friends)
- Socialization/Social Skills
- Spanking
- Step-Families
- Tantrums
- Teenage Issues
- Terrible Twos
- Toilet Training
