Young Teen/Junior High (13-15 years)

John's Most Recent Articles

Don't Enable Entitled Teen

Posted on 4/19/2022

A recent online article concerned a mom who refused to pay her teenage daughter for doing household chores. A poll of readers found that an overwhelming majority of them agreed with the...

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In Defense of ‘Because I Said So'

Posted on 2/1/2022

Q: Concerning chores, another expert recommends giving a child a certain number of chips, like poker chips, every month and if he or she fails to do a chore or doesn’t do it properly, you take a...

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Should Son Switch Schools?

Posted on 10/5/2021

Q: Our 13-year-old eighth-grader says he doesn’t like the small private school he attends and wants us to put him in public high school next year. His grades are fine, he’s got several close...

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The Biggest Problem Teachers Face Is Parents

Posted on 7/13/2021

When I ask a teacher, “What is the biggest problem you face?” the answer – there has never been an exception – is “parents.” That is certainly a recent phenomenon. My parents were...

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Four Steps To Give Argumentative Teenager the Last Word (and Restore Sanity)

Posted on 6/8/2021

Q: My fifteen-year-old daughter is slowly driving me insane! She argues with me about everything and always wants the last word. No matter how well I explain the “why?” of a decision to her, she...

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Micromanaging Child Always Produces Conflicts

Posted on 2/23/2021

A therapist takes a 10-year-old boy into what she calls “therapy.” The young fellow is belligerently defiant toward his parents and throws titanic tantrums when things don’t go his way. At school...

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Beware of 'The Protocol'

Posted on 12/29/2020

Q: Our son is seven years old and in the second grade. His school went virtual this past Spring and we see no end to it, not in the near term at least. When he was going to a brick-and-mortar...

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Leverage an End To Daughter's Defiance

Posted on 12/14/2020

Q: Our 14-year-old daughter desperately wants to begin wearing makeup, which all, and I mean all, of her classmates are allowed to do. We have held off not only because of our beliefs but also...

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Parents Can Recover From Not Getting Over the 'Hump of Parenting'

Posted on 10/20/2020

Q: In a recent column, you identified toddlerhood as “the hump of parenting.” As a grandmother who managed to raise five kids who were out of the house in their early twenties and are responsible...

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The Realities of Smartphones and Teenagers

Posted on 9/20/2020

A mother in California seeks her pastor’s opinion on allowing her fifteen-year-old son to have a smartphone. The boy claims that if he can’t use social media, he will have no friends. Mom is...

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Recent Questions

Young Teen Boy Watches Pornography on His Smart Phone

Posted 6 days ago

My question contains two parts: I have recently caught my fourteen year-old son watching pornography. He is otherwise a great kid. He is almost never moody and impulsive, he never drinks or uses...

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REBELLIOUS 15 YO

Posted 3 weeks ago

Rebellious 15 year old boy. Should we seek outside help / boarding school / other options? Our 3rd child, is teaching us that our first 2 made it look easy. He is a sweet, bright child, who...

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Psychology Degree?

Posted on 4/20/2022

Good grief. It’s me again. I have reached out to Mike, but this question, I would like to hear from you. One of my 15-year old daughters said she would like to pursue a degree in Psychology...

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How Often to Bathe...That is the Question

Posted on 4/19/2022

My almost 14 year old daughter refuses to shower regularly. If left up to her, she would only bathe probably 2x a week. This shouldn’t even be an issue. Do we just let her deal with natural...

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TEENS AND SMART DEVICES

Posted on 4/18/2022

I will be sending your books to my daughters on their wedding day. If we hadn’t raptured yet and still have enough ink supply to have your books in print. Teen proofing didn’t address...

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Fifteen-Year-Old Screen Addict

Posted on 4/18/2022

Our 15-year-old recently threw a fit, including punching, cursing and breaking things during the following incidents: 1) Took away make up after sneak purchase of $200 worth of make up without...

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FIFTEEN YEAR OLD SCREEN ADDICT

Posted on 4/15/2022

Our 15-year-old threw a fit, including punching, cursing and breaking things during following incidents: 1) Took away make up after sneak purchase of $200 worth of make up without our...

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PARENT ALIENATION

Posted on 4/14/2022

What are the best ways to deal with parent alienation? To help the teenage child in the middle? Any specific podcast? Books? Any advice on this topic would be appreciated. In this situation the...

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Parents Need To Be on The Same Page

Posted on 4/14/2022

In order to apply garden kick, should both parents sit down with the child and go over all the consequences for breaking family rules? One issue with my daughter is phone, I had asked her phone...

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It's Not About the Makeup: Time for a Garden Kick

Posted on 3/20/2022

15-year old daughter very obsessed with make-up. Used our Amazon account to buy makeup Products without our knowing till I looked up order history. Took away all her makeup products, went...

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Audio

Parenting the Strong Willed Teen Audio File

Posted on 1/8/2015

This is an entertaining and informative talk on understanding and managing even the most petulant of today’s teenagers. The talk was recorded live before an audience in San Diego, CA and is based...

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