"A child without rules is like a fish out of water. "

Young Teen/Junior High (13-15 years)

John's Most Recent Articles

Why Small Classrooms Are Overrated

Posted on 5/5/2020

No rational person would argue that the smaller the class size, the better, right?” asked the radio talk show host. “I think I’m a rational person,” I said, “and I can offer proof...

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In Defense of Homeschooling

Posted on 4/28/2020

In his November 1863 address at Gettysburg, Abraham Lincoln proclaimed that the men who lost their lives on that battlefield had done so in order that “government of the people, by the people and...

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Father's Visitation With Child Should Be Allowed

Posted on 1/15/2020

Q: Our ten-year-old granddaughter lives with us. We have custody of her but her father, our son, is now asking us for visitation privileges. I probably don’t need to tell you that both he and his...

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It Is Not Necessary to Help Your Child With Homework

Posted on 11/26/2019

After a recent talk in South Florida, women came up to me in droves asking, “How much should I help my children with their schoolwork?” That not one man asked the question...

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In Today's Parenting, Feelings Trump the Truth

Posted on 11/19/2019

Okay, it’s time to set the record straight, confront the gorilla in the proverbial room, call a spade a spade, and so on and so forth. I recently published a column on “The...

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Children Do Best in School When Parents Do Not Monitor Progress

Posted on 10/29/2019

The Portal. It sounds like something out of a science fiction novel, the gateway to an alternative universe that lures, then traps the unwary in its nefarious web of illusion, where things are...

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Teenage Girls and Boys Respond to Technology Differently

Posted on 10/2/2019

Q: We held off giving our oldest daughter a smartphone until she was fifteen, the age at which we allowed her older brother to have one. We read your column weekly in our hometown newspaper and...

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Teen Not a Suicide Risk

Posted on 7/23/2019

My recent column pertaining to a 12-year-old who told his parents he’d thought about suicide several times over the past six months stirred a fair number of folks to respond. Feelings toward the...

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How to Talk to Teens About Internet Pornography

Posted on 7/16/2019

Q: We recently discovered that our 12-year-old has been visiting pornography sites of all sorts on the Internet. When we caught him red-handed, he began crying and said he is addicted. Apparently,...

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Take Wait-And-See Attitude With Teen's Friend Choice

Posted on 6/11/2019

Q: Our 14-year-old (he’s going into the ninth grade at a public high school) has taken up with a bunch of kids that we don’t exactly approve of. They have reputations as troublemakers and at...

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Recent Questions

What to Do About Screen Addiction?

Posted 4 weeks ago

My 11-year-old son is obsessed with screens. If we tell him to do something while he is on his phone or iPad he huffs and puffs or we are told, “in a minute." Then he only gets 2 out of 3 chores...

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Insistence Will Lead To Resistance From Teenage Boy

Posted on 6/27/2020

I am a single mom with only one child, my 15yo son. He has recently started saying that he "isn't hungry" at dinnertime, or will "eat later", and says he doesn't want to eat with me. He often does...

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Navigating the grieving process.

Posted on 6/23/2020

My spouse recently died at home under hospice care. He had been ill for 5 years. Our grandchildren live close and have been partially living with us since they were born. We all are devastated. I...

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Teen drug use is complicated.

Posted on 6/15/2020

My 14 yr. old son had sleep over with classmate. During the evening the boys contacted an older boy & arranged to meet him to buy edible marijuana. After the adults went to bed, they left the...

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Emotional Intelligence Begins With Good Manners

Posted on 6/14/2020

Are you familiar with the term 2e kids? Or twice exceptional? Our 10 year old son appears to fall into this category. He is at above average intelligence, but his emotional iq is lacking and a...

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Teen in charge spells disaster.

Posted on 6/2/2020

15yr old daughter is only happy if everything is going her way. If something doesn’t suit her she ignores the family at dinner and on picnics And other family outings. But when her friend comes...

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Parenting Material is for Parents, Not Kids.

Posted on 6/1/2020

Is it ok to go through your material with our 12 year old son listening? It seems like he would understand better this way?

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Disrespectful Tween

Posted on 5/22/2020

My 11 year old daughter gets upset when I correct her and calls me names in her heart not aloud; but she later tells me those rude things and apologises. (The most recent name she called me...

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Don't take it personally

Posted on 5/2/2020

My 14 year old got a phone for christmas this year much to my regret. We put guidelines and restrictions in place to monitor her. I have her phone after bedtime and in looking at her texting...

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Establishing boundaries with 15 yo about boyfriend

Posted on 4/16/2020

I want to know how to establish boundaries with my 15 year old female teenager about the boyfriend. What resources do you recommend I read?

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Audio

Parenting the Strong Willed Teen Audio File

Posted on 1/8/2015

This is an entertaining and informative talk on understanding and managing even the most petulant of today’s teenagers. The talk was recorded live before an audience in San Diego, CA and is based...

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