"Parents who always go out of their way for their children eventually lose their way. "

Young Teen/Junior High (13-15 years)

John's Most Recent Articles

Children Do Best in School When Parents Do Not Monitor Progress

Posted 2 weeks ago

The Portal. It sounds like something out of a science fiction novel, the gateway to an alternative universe that lures, then traps the unwary in its nefarious web of illusion, where things are...

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Teenage Girls and Boys Respond to Technology Differently

Posted on 10/2/2019

Q: We held off giving our oldest daughter a smartphone until she was fifteen, the age at which we allowed her older brother to have one. We read your column weekly in our hometown newspaper and...

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Teen Not a Suicide Risk

Posted on 7/23/2019

My recent column pertaining to a 12-year-old who told his parents he’d thought about suicide several times over the past six months stirred a fair number of folks to respond. Feelings toward the...

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How to Talk to Teens About Internet Pornography

Posted on 7/16/2019

Q: We recently discovered that our 12-year-old has been visiting pornography sites of all sorts on the Internet. When we caught him red-handed, he began crying and said he is addicted. Apparently,...

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Take Wait-And-See Attitude With Teen's Friend Choice

Posted on 6/11/2019

Q: Our 14-year-old (he’s going into the ninth grade at a public high school) has taken up with a bunch of kids that we don’t exactly approve of. They have reputations as troublemakers and at...

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Simple Solutions for Teens, Tantrums and Smartphones

Posted on 12/4/2018

Q: Our 15-year-old daughter is very demanding and, to be honest, self-centered. One of the things she does is ask one of us for something and demand an instant decision, as in, “Can I go to the...

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Make 'Em an Offer They Can't Refuse

Posted on 10/16/2018

When I was a child, my most important possession was my bicycle, followed closely by my radio. My bike was how I got around. I rode it to school, friend’s houses, pick-up...

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The Peer Group: When to Do Something, What to Do, and When to Do Nothing

Posted on 5/1/2018

No question about it, the peer group exerts great influence on teenagers. From the way they dress to the way they carry their books, the stamp of peer pressure is upon them. If the influence is...

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Take Smartphone Away from Sassy Teen

Posted on 2/21/2018

Q: When our daughter, an only child, turned thirteen and entered the 8th grade, it was like a switch was flipped. Almost overnight, she went from being a sweet, respectful and obedient child who...

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Micromanaging Weakens Child's Success in School

Posted on 8/22/2017

Q: Our son attends first grade at the local public school. At the beginning of the school year, all the parents were basically told that we are expected to go to the school’s parent website every...

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Recent Questions

The Struggle is Real

Posted 1 week ago

We have struggled with our child being ashamed to be seen with either of us (her parents) in public, to the point that she acts in a way that hurts us. She is now in middle school (7th grade);...

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End Micromanagement of Grades by Lowering the Boom

Posted on 10/15/2019

I have two sons (13 and 14 years old) and one step son (12 years old). They've gone to a Christian school their whole lives and are all saved. My issue is with my 13 year old. He is very smart as...

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Teach Tweenager How to Manage Anger

Posted on 10/8/2019

Hi There, My daughter will be 11 yo on February, she is such a sweet/sensetive girl who likes to please others, but when she becomes angry she can not control it , she melts down for a while then...

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Consult with your spouse first.

Posted on 9/5/2019

Hi, I am having trouble dealing with my step daughter that is 15. My husband and I have 5 children together. He has two and I have three. My husbands daughter has severe anger and behavioral...

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14 YO Boy Looking For Friends

Posted on 8/28/2019

My son is 14 years old. He is having a lot of issues around relationships with friends/girlfriends. He seems to be struggling with feeling secure in his relationships. He needs a lot of...

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Field Trip

Posted on 8/22/2019

My son is 13. He is in 8th grade. The school he is attending goes on an intercession trip once a year. We did not allow him to go last year because of immaturity and he has stomach issues and has...

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Beating the Bullies

Posted on 6/20/2019

Here’s a topic I’ve been struggling with that I just saw John address in a Facebook post – mean kids. My oldest son (9) was complaining about some kids at his summer camp saying things like...

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15 yo Daughter and Foolish Friends

Posted on 6/15/2019

15 year old daughter has been vaping, possible drinking & lying. She has put inappropriate photos referencing vaping, getting high and raiding our liquor cabinet on her Instagram only seen by...

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13yo struggles

Posted on 5/29/2019

My son is 13. He will be starting 8th grade this year. He got 5 detentions and two phone calls to the school from other parents saying he was bothering their kids. The detentions were for...

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Homeschool Blues

Posted on 3/19/2019

I homeschool my 13 year old son. We are fairly new to our current city and have recently made friends by joining a local co-op. My son was asked, by his new friends, to join an additional co-op....

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Audio

Parenting the Strong Willed Teen Audio File

Posted on 1/8/2015

This is an entertaining and informative talk on understanding and managing even the most petulant of today’s teenagers. The talk was recorded live before an audience in San Diego, CA and is based...

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