"There are no argumentative children; only adults who argue with children."

Consequences/Punishment

John's Most Recent Articles

Moodiness Is Merely a Bad Emotional Habit

Posted on 10/27/2020

Living with an emotionally dramatic child is no fun. They throw wet blankets over nearly every family gathering or outing. Little is right in their lives and attempts to cheer them up generally...

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Alpha Speech: Say What You Mean, Mean What You Say

Posted on 8/6/2019

Q: Some friends of ours who’ve read a couple of your books and attended one of your talks told us that they solved some major discipline problems with their 4-year-old just by using what they...

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How to Talk to Teens About Internet Pornography

Posted on 7/16/2019

Q: We recently discovered that our 12-year-old has been visiting pornography sites of all sorts on the Internet. When we caught him red-handed, he began crying and said he is addicted. Apparently,...

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Use 'Alpha Speech' to Get Child to Obey

Posted on 5/14/2019

Q: My 7-year-old son, an only child, is giving me fits. He’s overly active and will not cooperate in any instruction I give him. In addition, if I tell him not to do something, it’s a guarantee...

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Make 'Em an Offer They Can't Refuse

Posted on 10/16/2018

When I was a child, my most important possession was my bicycle, followed closely by my radio. My bike was how I got around. I rode it to school, friend’s houses, pick-up...

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Let’s Revisit ‘Psychological Thinking’

Posted on 7/17/2018

I call it “psychological thinking,” referring to the tendency among parents of the last fifty years or so to attribute bad behavior on the part of a child to so-called “issues” that are thought to...

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Take Smartphone Away from Sassy Teen

Posted on 2/21/2018

Q: When our daughter, an only child, turned thirteen and entered the 8th grade, it was like a switch was flipped. Almost overnight, she went from being a sweet, respectful and obedient child who...

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Put a Lid on Materialistic Excess for Kid With Sticky Fingers

Posted on 7/19/2017

Q: We’ve just been informed that our 7-year-old son has been effectively “expelled” from the private school he attended last year because of repeated instances of stealing small items from...

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Parenting Magazine's Time-Out Technique 'Even Worse Than Before'

Posted on 6/27/2017

For several reasons, I am not a fan of parenting magazines. First, they reinforce the impression that child-rearing is a very complicated affair, requiring consulting with “experts” on a regular...

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America Needs a Parenting Retro-Revolution

Posted on 6/21/2017

I was honored to be a guest on my good friend Dennis Prager’s syndicated radio program the other day and as anyone who is familiar with my point-of-view on parenting matters will appreciate, much...

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Recent Questions

It's Her Problem to Solve

Posted 2 weeks ago

My daughter is struggling in school since grade 2. She's in French immersion. She has failed three tests in a row so far because she didn't study for them.. Her teacher says that she seems to...

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Children's Currency

Posted 2 weeks ago

Any advice on what discipline system is best used for children in school most of the day? My two oldest (8 & 6.5 girls) could use more "ticketed days," but they are at school from 7:30 - 3:30...

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Ticket System and Consequences

Posted 3 weeks ago

Thank you so much for your response! It was extremely helpful. I was reading more on the ticket system and had a question about the consequence my son should receive when he loses a single ticket....

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This Girl Just Wants to Have Fun

Posted 3 weeks ago

My 8 year old daughter is struggling at school. She just wants to have fun and be creative mostly...Anyway she has failed two tests so far and now her teacher is asking me to sit down because she...

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Toddler seems angered by the potty

Posted 4 weeks ago

Hi! We’ve been potty training for going on four months now. Daughter is 23 months. She has days where she goes accident free and then others where it’s 100% accident. The past few weeks she seems...

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Time to Take the Bull by the Horns

Posted 4 weeks ago

I strongly suspect my son (almost 16) has stolen money from me on a few occasions recently. A month ago $300 disappeared from my purse while we were away on a trip. At the time I thought it must...

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Prepare HS Senior or Repair College Freshman?

Posted 4 weeks ago

My son is a high school senior. He is a good kid, volunteers in the community and helps out around the home, doesn't drink or do drugs, respectful, etc. His grades have been mostly A's with a...

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Normal? Problem? Normal Problem?

Posted on 10/31/2020

Hello! I'm worried about my almost-14-YO daughter. Her grades remain good and she is still on her soccer team. She does not have a smartphone or tablet. Our wifi is off every night starting at 10...

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The Time for Tough Love is NOW

Posted on 10/31/2020

My son is 19 years old and has been graduated from high school for 1 1/2 years. His teen years were a struggle with almost not graduating, drug use and getting into trouble with the law. He no...

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10 Year Old Regresses in Behavior

Posted on 10/30/2020

My son is 10 years old and is going through a major regression. He knows all of the rules and has been doing great but with some recent changes to his schedule he's falling right back to where he...

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