Teenage Issues

John's Most Recent Articles

Back Off on Daughter’s Eyeliner Use

Posted on 6/28/2022

Q: Our 14-year-old daughter is a rising high school sophomore. We let her wear eyeliner this past year, but she is wearing entirely too much. She is well-adjusted (plays sports, good grades) but...

Read More

Don't Enable Entitled Teen

Posted on 4/19/2022

A recent online article concerned a mom who refused to pay her teenage daughter for doing household chores. A poll of readers found that an overwhelming majority of them agreed with the...

Read More

Kids Need Parents Who Are Authentic Adults

Posted on 3/22/2022

The contemporary parenting ideal consists of equal parts fixer, go-fer, and friend, which is why, when it is encountered in the flesh by someone of my ancient age, the new definition of a “good...

Read More

Is Vaping Ok for High School Senior?

Posted on 2/15/2022

Q: Our son, a senior in high school, is vaping. He claims he does it to control his anxiety. I worry about him getting into harder drugs when when he goes to college this coming fall. What’s your...

Read More

Just 'Stop It!'

Posted on 10/12/2021

I often find myself telling parents that they need to stop doing something that is counterproductive and, in most cases, contributing significantly to whatever parenting problem is bedeviling...

Read More

Should Son Switch Schools?

Posted on 10/5/2021

Q: Our 13-year-old eighth-grader says he doesn’t like the small private school he attends and wants us to put him in public high school next year. His grades are fine, he’s got several close...

Read More

How To Help Your Child Get More Grit

Posted on 9/7/2021

It’s all over the web, that “grit” thing. Seems like every day, I get some promo for a webinar on how to get more grit, project more grit, or get in touch with your inner grit. So, allow me to...

Read More

Four Steps To Give Argumentative Teenager the Last Word (and Restore Sanity)

Posted on 6/8/2021

Q: My fifteen-year-old daughter is slowly driving me insane! She argues with me about everything and always wants the last word. No matter how well I explain the “why?” of a decision to her, she...

Read More

Today’s Kids Suffer a Lack of Common Sense in Their Lives

Posted on 12/22/2020

A journalist asks, “What is the biggest challenge facing today’s children?” “The real world,” I said. For the last fifty years or so, good parenting has been defined...

Read More

Teen Not a Suicide Risk

Posted on 7/23/2019

My recent column pertaining to a 12-year-old who told his parents he’d thought about suicide several times over the past six months stirred a fair number of folks to respond. Feelings toward the...

Read More
View All Articles

Recent Questions

Ditch the "Smart" Phones

Posted yesterday

Hello, After coming in contact with your blog, I (dad) am trying to be more macro manager and not micro with my two girls, 13&11. They have iPhones. Should I be setting a screen time limit?...

Read More

YOUNG TEEN SEXUAL MISCONDUCT

Posted on 6/28/2022

We have a large and close-knit extended family with 27 cousins newborn to 16-years-old. A few months ago, at a family gathering there was a surprising incident of sexual misconduct involving a...

Read More

Young Teen Boy Watches Pornography on His Smart Phone

Posted on 5/17/2022

My question contains two parts: I have recently caught my fourteen year-old son watching pornography. He is otherwise a great kid. He is almost never moody and impulsive, he never drinks or uses...

Read More

REBELLIOUS 15 YO

Posted on 5/1/2022

Rebellious 15 year old boy. Should we seek outside help / boarding school / other options? Our 3rd child, is teaching us that our first 2 made it look easy. He is a sweet, bright child, who...

Read More

TRANSGENDER TEENS AT FAMILY GATHERING

Posted on 4/28/2022

My children are 13, 11 and 8 years old. We are Christian, and being so, believe in treating others with respect, even when we don't agree with the other's lifestyle. We will be attending a...

Read More

How Often to Bathe...That is the Question

Posted on 4/19/2022

My almost 14 year old daughter refuses to shower regularly. If left up to her, she would only bathe probably 2x a week. This shouldn’t even be an issue. Do we just let her deal with natural...

Read More

Fifteen-Year-Old Screen Addict

Posted on 4/18/2022

Our 15-year-old recently threw a fit, including punching, cursing and breaking things during the following incidents: 1) Took away make up after sneak purchase of $200 worth of make up without...

Read More

Parents Need To Be on The Same Page

Posted on 4/14/2022

In order to apply garden kick, should both parents sit down with the child and go over all the consequences for breaking family rules? One issue with my daughter is phone, I had asked her phone...

Read More

Dealing With Teenager's Attitude

Posted on 4/11/2022

My 12-year-old daughter is not motivated to do school anymore. She is in 6th grade and has always been homeschooled. But now, she is just "dead in the water" and paddling no where. She constantly...

Read More

12 Year Old Daughter Unmotivated to do School Work

Posted on 4/6/2022

My 12 year old daughter is not motivated to do school anymore. She is in 6th grade and has always been home-schooled. But now, she is just "dead in the water" and paddling no where. She just lays...

Read More
View All Questions

Audio

Parenting the Strong Willed Teen Audio File

Posted on 1/8/2015

This is an entertaining and informative talk on understanding and managing even the most petulant of today’s teenagers. The talk was recorded live before an audience in San Diego, CA and is based...

Read More
View All Audio