"In the eyes of a child, parents are "mean" when the child discovers that they mean what they say. "

Rebellious Behavior

John's Most Recent Articles

Parents Should Sweat the Small Stuff

Posted on 6/7/2016

Q: While exploring your website, I ran across a column you wrote a while back about a 13-year-old who wanted a Mohawk haircut. You told the parents not to allow it, pointing out that if you give...

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Recent Questions

Kicking An Angry 17 Year Old Out Of The Garden of Eden

Posted on 4/13/2019

Our 17 year old son is completely out of control. None of the consequences that we have given him have helped. His biggest problem is his angry outbursts. He has destroyed his relationship with...

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Prevailing not Travailing

Posted on 3/9/2019

My 14 year old daughter was mad at me about a consequence I gave her after clearly telling her what the expectations were. She knew what the rules were and broke them so I gave her the...

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Meaningful or Logical?

Posted on 3/1/2019

Having a hard time with my 3.5 year old boy and what would be a logical consequence - every morning and after nap time he struggles with getting out of bed reasonably. He usually wails and...

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Prepare to lead before leading.

Posted on 2/11/2019

My 11-year-old son tells lies and avoids the truth even when he knows he's been caught, he will argue every point he disagrees with, he will disobey punishment by simply walking away. We do not...

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The Terrible 12's

Posted on 2/7/2019

A few months have passed. This school year seems to have been a big step for my now 12 year old. We have been struggling most of the school year and just got his grades for the second quarter. The...

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The Defiant Young Adult

Posted on 1/31/2019

My son turns 18 tomorrow. He seems to think this means he can do whatever he wants, including not doing what I ask. He is picking his girlfriend up at the airport this evening and I told him he...

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Discipline Drama Take 2

Posted on 1/20/2019

How do you get a 38month old child to comply? I have a little girl who says no to almost everything I tell/ask her to do. What do I do if she just doesn’t do It? Make her sit in her chair until...

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Avoid Making Mountains out of Molehills

Posted on 1/18/2019

Our 12-year-old daughter is raising concerns (both ours and at least one of her teachers') with violence in her writing. Last fall she asked me to read over a fictional short story she had written...

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Intro To The Parent-Centered Family

Posted on 1/10/2019

I have a four year old whom I am wondering is just being a kid....she does seek our attention but we have daily reading together and about 30 min play of the afternoon. I stay home with her and...

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14 year old farmer's son is disrespectful to Mother

Posted on 12/31/2018

My son, who turned 14 in November, has become very disrespectful to his mother. We live on a farm and the place is not clean to his liking. He thinks his mother is lazy, won't pick up after...

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