"To be an effective disciplinarian, you must be a model of self-discipline. "

John's Discipline Methods

John's Most Recent Articles

Emancipation of Adult Children Can Be Messy

Posted 1 week ago

When children were raised, reared, or simply brought up, they emancipated “on time.” Upon high school graduation, children went to college, into the military, or became employed. Some, like my...

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We're Living in a Child's World

Posted 3 weeks ago

Concerning major behavior problems, parents often tell me they’ve “tried everything.” In more than forty years of doing this “parenting expert” gig, I’ve never run across a parent who was telling...

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Use 'Alpha Speech' to Get Child to Obey

Posted on 5/14/2019

Q: My 7-year-old son, an only child, is giving me fits. He’s overly active and will not cooperate in any instruction I give him. In addition, if I tell him not to do something, it’s a guarantee...

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You Can't Win 'Em All

Posted on 3/5/2019

I’ve been writing this column for forty-three years and speaking publicly for nearly as long. If there’s one thing I’ve learned it’s that when it comes to my subject matter, you can’t win ‘em...

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Today's Parents Don't Know How to Properly Convey Authority

Posted on 1/17/2018

Four sentences into her Wall Street Journal article on recent research into spanking (“Spanking for Misbehavior? It Causes More!” December 17, 2017), the author, Susan Pinker, makes two grievous...

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Strike While the Iron Is Cold

Posted on 11/17/2017

Recently, a mother asked how she and her husband could make their 16-year-old son stop talking disrespectfully to them. So far, she said, they'd complained, threatened and occasionally taken his...

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3 year-old Tantrums

Posted on 9/8/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: Our first, a girl, just turned three and has suddenly started throwing tantrums. She can begin a tantrum when she’s alone in her room if something...

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Losing Tickets on the Ticket System

Posted on 12/16/2014

Q: I’ve been trying for two months with little to no success to get your “ticket” system to work on my 4-year-old daughter. The target behaviors are ignoring me when I tell her to do...

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Piling On

Posted on 4/28/2014

In football, "piling on" occurs when defensive players continue to fall on top of an offensive player after he's been tackled. Because it's unnecessary as well as dangerous, piling on is...

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Out of the Garden

Posted on 4/28/2014

Occasionally a behavior problem is so BIG that nothing short of what I call "nuclear discipline" will do. Your great-grandparents called it "lowering the boom." Regardless of terminology, the...

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Recent Questions

4 and 5 year old brothers tag team Mom

Posted 5 days ago

My older boy, age 5 has been on the ticket system for about 9 months. He starts the day with 3 tickets and his misbehaviors are screaming at us and not obeying us. My younger boy, 4 has recently...

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Discipline is not Always Convenient

Posted 1 week ago

When our son hits, we send him to his room for the entire day. However, his hitting tends to happen towards dinner/bedtime so we sentence him to his room the next day. Inevitably, it falls on a...

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The 2 Year Old Bedtime Staller

Posted on 5/15/2019

Hi! My 22 month old daughter had started displaying stalling tactics to avoid bedtime and other undesirable activities. She wants to kiss all her toys goodnight, attempts to give more kisses and...

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Hop off the Argument Merry Go Round

Posted on 5/5/2019

Hi there, My almost 5-year-old has come a long way from his 3-year-old self. I suppose maturity helps. He's no longer throwing tantrums (a.k.a crying loudly) or hitting when he doesn't get his...

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Teacher Emails and When to Request a Conference

Posted on 5/1/2019

Hello, I received this email from my daughter's teacher today and am seeking your guidance. This all seems to have been precipitated by a tick bite (her first) that we took care of last week,...

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Kicking An Angry 17 Year Old Out Of The Garden of Eden

Posted on 4/13/2019

Our 17 year old son is completely out of control. None of the consequences that we have given him have helped. His biggest problem is his angry outbursts. He has destroyed his relationship with...

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Strike a Balance

Posted on 3/26/2019

I’m having a difficult time with my nearly 6 year old son. It feels like we are butting heads all of the time. He has become increasingly more sensitive lately. Throwing huge tantrums, crying over...

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'Children Challenging Chores'

Posted on 3/12/2019

I am troubled with the completion of chores issue. I like to get stuff done then play and have attempted to teach my kids the same values or strategies but..... being kids of course they choose...

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Doing it Right Means Staying the Course

Posted on 3/12/2019

Hello, We recently asked a question about our seven year old son who was refusing to stay in his room after losing all his daily strikes. We were told to make him 'an offer he hopefully can't...

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Lowering the Boom

Posted on 3/1/2019

I have been seeking help from this site for a long time and would appreciate you looking through our history for insight and understanding. My now seven year old son is still having behavior...

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