"If your child accuses you of being "mean," you must have done something right. "

John's Discipline Methods

John's Most Recent Articles

"The Doctor" Is the Tool Every Parent Needs

Posted 6 days ago

I have good news for parents: You do not need more than a few tools in your disciplinary tool-bag. One especially valuable tool, one that belongs in every modern home, is the “Doctor.” The Doctor...

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Replace Psychological With Old Fashioned Parenting

Posted 3 weeks ago

As my regular readers know, I am a certified heretic in my field: child and family psychology. To the point, I am convinced that psychological parenting theory, which began to inform American...

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Emancipation of Adult Children Can Be Messy

Posted on 6/4/2019

When children were raised, reared, or simply brought up, they emancipated “on time.” Upon high school graduation, children went to college, into the military, or became employed. Some, like my...

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We're Living in a Child's World

Posted on 5/21/2019

Concerning major behavior problems, parents often tell me they’ve “tried everything.” In more than forty years of doing this “parenting expert” gig, I’ve never run across a parent who was telling...

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Use 'Alpha Speech' to Get Child to Obey

Posted on 5/14/2019

Q: My 7-year-old son, an only child, is giving me fits. He’s overly active and will not cooperate in any instruction I give him. In addition, if I tell him not to do something, it’s a guarantee...

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You Can't Win 'Em All

Posted on 3/5/2019

I’ve been writing this column for forty-three years and speaking publicly for nearly as long. If there’s one thing I’ve learned it’s that when it comes to my subject matter, you can’t win ‘em...

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Today's Parents Don't Know How to Properly Convey Authority

Posted on 1/17/2018

Four sentences into her Wall Street Journal article on recent research into spanking (“Spanking for Misbehavior? It Causes More!” December 17, 2017), the author, Susan Pinker, makes two grievous...

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Strike While the Iron Is Cold

Posted on 11/17/2017

Recently, a mother asked how she and her husband could make their 16-year-old son stop talking disrespectfully to them. So far, she said, they'd complained, threatened and occasionally taken his...

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3 year-old Tantrums

Posted on 9/8/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: Our first, a girl, just turned three and has suddenly started throwing tantrums. She can begin a tantrum when she’s alone in her room if something...

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Losing Tickets on the Ticket System

Posted on 12/16/2014

Q: I’ve been trying for two months with little to no success to get your “ticket” system to work on my 4-year-old daughter. The target behaviors are ignoring me when I tell her to do...

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Recent Questions

End Micromanagement of Grades by Lowering the Boom

Posted 6 days ago

I have two sons (13 and 14 years old) and one step son (12 years old). They've gone to a Christian school their whole lives and are all saved. My issue is with my 13 year old. He is very smart as...

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Be the Alpha Female

Posted 1 week ago

Our 5 yo son is very well-behaved at school (he just started kindergarten 6 weeks ago) but his behavior has worsened by extremes at home. Especially at bedtime, if I don't snuggle him in his bed...

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Teach Tweenager How to Manage Anger

Posted 1 week ago

Hi There, My daughter will be 11 yo on February, she is such a sweet/sensetive girl who likes to please others, but when she becomes angry she can not control it , she melts down for a while then...

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Disrespectful 7-Year-Old

Posted 2 weeks ago

We are using the discipline strategies taught in Well-Behaved Child. I home school 7 and 5 year old boys. My 7 year old responds to me with disrespectful remarks. For example: "You are so mean, I...

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Toddlers in "Time Out" can create More "Tired Out" Parents

Posted 2 weeks ago

For a 2 year old who is able to climb out of a playpen (and makes a game of it if the parent tries to keep them in), what else would make a suitable time-out area? We live in a rented...

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Too Many Expectations for 9-Year-Old

Posted 3 weeks ago

My daughter is 9, she is very respectful (although disobeying and arguing are not respectful) and has great manners ("yes ma'am", "yes, sir"). She has given me a run for my money her whole life...

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Grandparent Etiquette

Posted on 9/15/2019

I am a single mom with a 6-year-old girl. Both sets of grandparents live close by, and she is very close to both of them. I am trying to teach her that when we visit, she is to say hello,...

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Sleeping in your own bed.

Posted on 9/7/2019

Our 11 year old son has been afraid of sleeping in his room alone for essentially since he moved from his crib to a big bed. He and his older sister (now 13) shared a bedroom for several years...

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3 y/o Drama Queen

Posted on 9/5/2019

Every time we have to say goodbye to my 3 year old's friend, she cries like it's the end of the world and has a fit... We go on nightly walks with them and I have stopped because I do not want to...

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When Food Issues Become Power Struggles

Posted on 9/5/2019

I asked a question about my 8 year old sneaking sweets - we have since carried out your suggestions - but it is not working. She looks for other ways to get sweets. We allowed her to buy some cup...

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