"If your child accuses you of being "mean," you must have done something right. "

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Parent leadership trumps child leadership

Posted 5 days ago

Dear Rosemond and team, Recently (a few weeks ago), my son graduated from his 30 stickers (1 a day) for aggression and tantrums and got his things and privileges back. BUT the tantrums (it's...

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Frustrated over asking.

Posted 5 days ago

I have a 9 year old son who has a passive defiant attitude. He doesn't ever talk back or freak out when he doesn't get his way but will "ignore" what we ask him to do and act like he just forgot....

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Hop off the Argument Merry Go Round

Posted 2 weeks ago

Hi there, My almost 5-year-old has come a long way from his 3-year-old self. I suppose maturity helps. He's no longer throwing tantrums (a.k.a crying loudly) or hitting when he doesn't get his...

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Creating Opportunities for Freedom!

Posted 2 weeks ago

Regarding your article "Freedom lost on the children of today" I am inspired by the moms of the last generation - my parents, too, experienced a similar kind of thing growing up. Running around,...

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child sends mixed message

Posted 2 weeks ago

I have a personal friend that went through a bitter divorce approximately 6 years ago. She has 4 children ages 14, 13, 10.5 and 9.5. The three older ones are girls and the youngest a boy. The...

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Good decisions sometimes hurt.

Posted 2 weeks ago

Hi, Question: What advise can you give? I'm a female in a same-sex marriage and have an 8 year old. He doesn't want to live with me because of my instability with moving from place to place and...

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Teacher Emails and When to Request a Conference

Posted 2 weeks ago

Hello, I received this email from my daughter's teacher today and am seeking your guidance. This all seems to have been precipitated by a tick bite (her first) that we took care of last week,...

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Nail polish all over the counter again!

Posted 3 weeks ago

About a year ago my daughter and her friend accidentally spilled some nail polish on the counter and tried to cover it up and not tell us. She was punished by cleaning all the bathrooms in our...

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Get Off the Repeating Merry-go-round

Posted on 4/4/2019

When I am telling my children to do smth, or not to do, I have to repeat it many times. I have to raise my voice, but I hate to scream. Or when I tell my son to do smth, he would repeat after me...

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Distractible Kids - Frustrated Mom

Posted on 3/30/2019

Dear Rosemond and team, Im still having a tough time with the kids. I'll just write 2 questions in one - My almost 5 year old finally earned his 30 stickers (from no tantrums + aggression)..now...

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How Coaching Works

Posted on 3/27/2019

Thank you for the response and I’m so sorry for your loss. Can you clarify how the private parenting coaches work and how much it is and for what amount of time? I’ve been reading The Well Behaved...

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6 yro has trouble occupying herself

Posted on 3/25/2019

Our 6-year-old daughter does not like to occupy herself. When we ask her to play by herself, she keeps coming from her room asking us to play with her or asking us to be with her. But when she is...

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Grumble Troubles

Posted on 3/19/2019

Our son is 5.5 yo and has often had a negative attitude, but in the past few weeks has taken a turn for the worse. He regularly grumbles and complains throughout the day and when given routine...

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Marriage Hurting Due to Children

Posted on 3/18/2019

HI there, I am really feeling the weight of childrearing recently. I'm a stay home mum. My husband and I only ever fight about the children - and nothing much else..usually when I get a worked up...

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'Children Challenging Chores'

Posted on 3/12/2019

I am troubled with the completion of chores issue. I like to get stuff done then play and have attempted to teach my kids the same values or strategies but..... being kids of course they choose...

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Doing it Right Means Staying the Course

Posted on 3/12/2019

Hello, We recently asked a question about our seven year old son who was refusing to stay in his room after losing all his daily strikes. We were told to make him 'an offer he hopefully can't...

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Airplane anxiety

Posted on 3/11/2019

Our 10-year-old child has difficulty with air travel. Her nausea, primarily caused by anxiety over her past nausea during air travel, starts in the car on the way to the airport. She gets very...

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Kindergarten Homework Hassles

Posted on 3/7/2019

I have a young kindergartner (won't turn six until this summer), although he is doing good enough in kinder, he is very easily distracted - bright light distraction. During school and homework at...

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In Control without Controlling

Posted on 3/5/2019

We seem to be stuck on screen time issues in our house. Our kids, 11 and 7 are allowed 20 min a day once they have completed all their chores. Markedly less than many children are allowed (as my...

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Higher Level Thinking Skills

Posted on 3/1/2019

My 7 year old son has a problem solving problem. Any task he performs can make him melt down. I am sure that when he was younger I would jump in and solve his problem, but I have been very...

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Lowering the Boom

Posted on 3/1/2019

I have been seeking help from this site for a long time and would appreciate you looking through our history for insight and understanding. My now seven year old son is still having behavior...

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Sometimes kids are weird

Posted on 2/24/2019

My 6 year old still puts things in his mouth, toys, icicles from the bottom of the car. We've explained why he needs to stop this behaviour, but don't know how to effectively stop the behaviour....

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Difficult Conversation Must Happen

Posted on 2/23/2019

Dear John, I've been a follower of yours for almost 20 years now. You have helped me to see that I can strike a balance between the "new psychobabble" and God's Truth. I am forced to balance...

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Grandmother's standards.

Posted on 2/22/2019

My two grand-daughters live with their dad now that my daughter is dead. Their dad is a pathological liar and my daughter would get very upset when the girls "exaggerated" or out right lied to...

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Toying With Grandma

Posted on 2/22/2019

My six-year-old granddaughter is terrible about helping her sister put up toys. She always has been. Before my daughter died, she was trying hard to get her to obey without all the drama, and the...

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Putting Night Terrors To Bed

Posted on 2/20/2019

My 7 year old daughter is scared of dying, similar to the story John tells of his daughter, Amy, when she was young. The fears come at bedtime. I don't know if Amy did this, but our Irene says...

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7 year old boy needs leadership to solve the problem

Posted on 2/20/2019

We are using the Strike System with our two children. Our seven year old boy often receives all of his strikes as he is a High Misbehaver (currently) and is sent to his room. However, he will not...

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Diagnosing the Problem

Posted on 2/20/2019

My 6 year old son is currently undergoing a neuropsychological evaluation to help identify root causes of his recent struggles to keep up academically in 1st grade due to difficulty in paying...

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Early Bird Turns Cranky

Posted on 2/12/2019

Good Evening, Our seven year old son has always been up with the birds (in WA that is anywhere between 4.30am-5.00am). On the plus side, he goes to sleep at 6.30pm without any trouble. We have...

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8 y/o Boy Distracted Easily At School

Posted on 1/30/2019

We have an 8yo boy. His teacher let us know he “often gets distracted in the middle of a task, needs multiple reminders to turn in work, write down his homework, and to focus on the task at...

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7.5 yo girl pulling mom's strings

Posted on 1/29/2019

HI, I've been working on forgetfulness for a while on my 7.5 year old daughter. She is given an instruction, but VERY often either fails to complete it or does an incomplete job of it. This has...

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Multiple Kids, One Room?

Posted on 1/27/2019

OK, I'm going to try again with a different formulation. For decades Dr. Rosemond has been advocating tickets/blocks with isolation in a comparatively stripped down room as the end state for x...

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Blended family blues.

Posted on 1/21/2019

Just wondering if you feel that all children in a step family should be treated the same, as far as, rules, quality time etc? My husband feels that since his children only have visitation with us...

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Anger Begets Anger

Posted on 1/17/2019

I need advice on losing my temper with my kids. They are 3 and 6 and occasionally I lose my temper- scream at them, sometimes use a swear word and am just mean to them. Yes they have done...

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Liberating the Playmate Dad

Posted on 1/11/2019

I read the column by Dinah Bucholz, Stop Paying Attention to Your Kids. I'm struggling because this is my downfall. My daughter wants me to play with her constantly. I have an overwhelming sense...

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"Parental Empowerment Conquers Medical Experiments"

Posted on 1/10/2019

My kids are considering putting my grandson 6yrs on medication, for being hyper and not paying attention at school. Do you know what after effects this will bring?

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Move 9 yo Son into Parents' Bedroom?

Posted on 1/9/2019

Son is 9 years old and has a sister age 7 and brother age 1. About one month prior to brother's birth, son's upstairs bedroom was converted to a nursery and son's bedroom was moved downstairs (all...

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Should You Worry About a Shy Kid?

Posted on 1/3/2019

My 10 year old daughter is shy and has trouble making friends. She can handle one on one situations, but she shuts down in a group. (and one on one is rarely the case as she has two sisters near...

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Seperation Anxiety

Posted on 12/21/2018

Our kindergartner (6 year old boy) cries and clings to our leg every morning at school drop off. His teacher notes that he is fine within a minute of our departure. He also cried and clung to us...

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Consequences

Posted on 12/19/2018

OK, I have a question concerning consequences using the system Dr. Rosemond has advocated for decades and that we used successfully with our oldest two (now delightful and responsible older...

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Now what?

Posted on 12/13/2018

Hey thank you for the answer I needed..I have taken her phone permanently only reason she had a phone is because her dad lives out of town and I work far from where I’m at and he bought her a...

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Where's That Wonderful Daughter?

Posted on 12/12/2018

My 8-year-old daughter has been a wonderful child until about a month ago. She’s lying a lot, not doing what we ask her to do, and she talks back. I have asked her what is wrong, and she tells me...

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The Headless Choresmen

Posted on 12/7/2018

Having completed "Parenting by the Book" , I sadly realize I have done my children no favors by doing so much for them. They are now 7 and 11 and need to be reminded to do every little thing. We...

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Caution: Response not politically correct.

Posted on 11/30/2018

Hi! My husband and I have three kids; a girl age 8 and boy and girl twins age 6. The girl twin has recently gotten to be very into “boy things” and please listen before making judgements. I think...

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School Age Attention Seeker

Posted on 11/5/2018

I have a 10 yo who says she is good at nothing, not intelligent, not good at school. She is not putting effort in nothing she is doing. She doesn't want to do her homeworks and doesn't care if...

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6 year old's Target Misbehaviors must be concrete and specific

Posted on 10/29/2018

We have been doing the chart system for a week now with our 6 year old son targeting disrespect/defiance and disobedience. We started out with 8 squares a day. There have only been a few days when...

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Where Lego Ends, Tickets Begin

Posted on 10/28/2018

We just started using the ticket system on our 6 year old son yesterday. Following is an example of this morning, which we're not quite sure how to handle. Our son is busy playing with his Lego...

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Out of Control 7yr old

Posted on 10/27/2018

Hi, my husband and I would appreciate some advice on our situation with our 7 year old daughter. Her medication has become ineffective recently and we are at our wits end with what to do with...

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A Six Year old's School Struggles

Posted on 10/22/2018

Our 6 yo girl went to school this year and she faced three problems there: First, she doesn’t recognize teachers’ authority (although she has due respect to us parents). This problem is further...

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Taming the Class Clown

Posted on 10/15/2018

My son is 8 years old and I'm trying the "out of the garden" to correct some behaviors. He's already corrected two of them but having trouble with his 3rd misbehavior which is having a good day at...

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