"Parents cannot effectively communicate their love to a child unless they are also a source of effective authority. "

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6 year old's Target Misbehaviors must be concrete and specific

Posted 2 weeks ago

We have been doing the chart system for a week now with our 6 year old son targeting disrespect/defiance and disobedience. We started out with 8 squares a day. There have only been a few days when...

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Where Lego Ends, Tickets Begin

Posted 2 weeks ago

We just started using the ticket system on our 6 year old son yesterday. Following is an example of this morning, which we're not quite sure how to handle. Our son is busy playing with his Lego...

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A Six Year old's School Struggles

Posted 3 weeks ago

Our 6 yo girl went to school this year and she faced three problems there: First, she doesn’t recognize teachers’ authority (although she has due respect to us parents). This problem is further...

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Taming the Class Clown

Posted 4 weeks ago

My son is 8 years old and I'm trying the "out of the garden" to correct some behaviors. He's already corrected two of them but having trouble with his 3rd misbehavior which is having a good day at...

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No Tolerance For Hitting

Posted on 10/11/2018

My grandson is the perfect student inside the classroom. However, when allowed outside to play, especially team sports such as basketball, he becomes very aggressive. He hits when something...

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Don't Play Dumb With Me

Posted on 10/9/2018

My son is 8 years old and is having behavioral problems. One of his issues is playing dumb. He always acts like he doesn't know what he's supposed to be doing and is always leaving his belongings...

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Tickets Explained

Posted on 10/8/2018

Hi. I'm not quite sure how the ticket system works. I have a 10yo boy who pesters like crazy if he doesn't get his way. He also talks very sassy to his parents and grandparents. I desperately need...

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Parenting perspective adjustment.

Posted on 10/6/2018

My 8 year old son is giving us a few issues. He primarily lives with my husband and I, and goes to his fathers every Friday and every other weekend. He is allowed to do whatever he wants which...

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5 year old boy behaves better at home than at school

Posted on 10/4/2018

My 5 year old son is in preschool, and we are working very hard on his behavior and manners. He still has tantrums which I am working hard to end. Lately, when he has a tantrum or is disrespectful...

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Exposure to Exposure

Posted on 9/26/2018

Hello. I read so many articles about what to do after a child or teen has been exposed and then becomes addicted to pornography. What are some steps to protect my child from interacting with...

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Getting a 4 and 6 yr old help get ready for school bus

Posted on 9/24/2018

This year my 4 year old has joined my 6 year old in the morning school routine, as she is in 4K and the other in 1st grade. They take the bus to school together and they have a list of things to...

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Forgetful Schooler

Posted on 9/24/2018

Hi there, how can I discipline a 7 year old girl who is always forgetting instructions to be completed? I would giver her 2 or 3 instructions and she completes 1 or 2 of them, or completes all but...

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Use John's ABC or DRC Method for Issues at School?

Posted on 9/24/2018

My son is currently in the 4th grade. At the beginning of the school year, we implemented the "ABC's of Effective Homework Management" and as expected, our son has been slacking on his homework...

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Empathy, an important skill to be practiced

Posted on 9/23/2018

How can I assist my child in developing empathy?

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Mean Girl IRL

Posted on 9/22/2018

Hello, our 9 year old son has been getting grief from a girl 1-2 years older than he. She tells her friends to stay from our son. She does this routinely and continues to recruit more of her and...

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Withholding Birthday From 7 Year Old

Posted on 9/19/2018

Hi, My 7 year old daughter has a perfect word that describes her actions towards her home school and chores, and that word is lollygag. I have frustrations with this and have for awhile. I had to...

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6 Year Fearful of Being Alone

Posted on 9/19/2018

I’m looking for some feedback on how to handle our 6 year old boy’s fear of being alone. It started about a year ago and seemed to have lessened after a few months but has resurfaced recently with...

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How to Encourage Dyslexic Child

Posted on 9/12/2018

Hello, My child is in second grade and is severely dyslexic. She has an IEP and also receives specific dyslexia tutoring outside of school. Her classroom teacher is very strict and she is...

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Six year old needs a leader.

Posted on 9/12/2018

My son just turned 6 and started Kindergarten at a really great private school that has high expectations for kind behavior. His behavior in the classroom is very good, but he's having a bit of...

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7 yo "won't" go to sleep without parents in bed

Posted on 9/10/2018

My 7-year old (almost 8) will not sleep without mom or dad laying with her until she is asleep. She says she is afraid she will not be able to go to sleep. If we stay with her until she is asleep,...

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Normal Sexual Behaviors for 6 YO

Posted on 9/9/2018

I have seen by 6, almost 7 year old daughter touching herself several times when i have walked in her room. Is this normal for sucha young age?

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Strong willed v. needing leadership.

Posted on 9/7/2018

I'm a single mother of a strong-willed 6 years old daughter. Her Dad hasn't been around much. We divorced when my daughter was almost 2 yrs because of substance abuse. Recently, the paternal...

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Never feed fear.

Posted on 9/5/2018

Hi there. My 10 year old son is very fearful of thunderstorms. He panics before they happen and is a mess when a bad one is going on. He loses a lot of sleep during a storm. Any thoughts?

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11 m, 3.5 and 7yrs Road-trip Remedies

Posted on 9/3/2018

Hello! We have three usually well behaved children who were all raised on the Parenting By the Book philosophy. They sleep in their own beds, do normal age appropriate chores, have normal sibling...

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4 year old's hitting has gone on way too long

Posted on 8/29/2018

My son is 4 years old and does not listen to direction and hits at home and school ( mom, younger sister, school friends and teachers and occasionally dad). This behavior has been going on for at...

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18m & 6 yrs Daughters Dealing with Dad's Death

Posted on 8/26/2018

Does John have any writings on children dealing with the death of a parent? My 37yo husband suffered a heart attack and passed away while we were on a family vacation last month (totally...

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NIGHTTIME=NICETIME for spouses who enforce a child's bedtime

Posted on 8/24/2018

We have a 9 yo girl and 7 yo boy. Bedtime is usually supposed to be at 8pm. In the last several months, both of them, though mainly our daughter, has slowly pushed that back to 9, sometimes 10pm,...

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Parent anxiety can be contagious to 8 yo

Posted on 8/22/2018

Our 8-year-old son is headed back to school tomorrow, and we just got word that one of his favorite elementary teachers has been arrested for third-degree sexual abuse. We believe in the “Tell him...

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Thoughts on ADHD and Discipline

Posted on 8/19/2018

Where can I find John's thoughts on disciplining children with ADHD? I remember reading in one of his books that they can learn how to behave with the same disciplinary methods used with "normal"...

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6 yo Throwing Wits Ending Tantrums

Posted on 8/17/2018

I am at my wit’s end. My 6 year old is making life miserable for our household. She is very strong willed and gets very angry easily. At school she gets certificates for her “model behavior”....

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Lights out! on Agonizing, Nagging & Hovering

Posted on 8/13/2018

After reading one of John's books recently, it's been like a light bulb coming on for me. A very bright, harsh light bulb... There are so many ways I have been failing. I've been implementing...

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Screen time is all up to you!

Posted on 8/13/2018

I am at my wits end with screen time and Fort Night. I try and stay by a limited number of minutes and it’s never enough and always ends up in a huge battle . I give him an hour he takes five...

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taking back authority over 7yo

Posted on 8/12/2018

I recently discovered Mr. Rosemond's books. My husband and I are now implementing his ideas with our 7 year old son who gets easily frustrated when he doesn't get his way, ignores our demands,...

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What to Tackle First?

Posted on 8/9/2018

I am a recovering-yeller, and do not even have a 30-day chip under my belt. I have always been quick to anger and highly impulsive in my parenting "technique'. My son (9) is one of those...

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Address manners with 9 year old one at a time

Posted on 8/8/2018

I'm hoping for a response from Katherine Saltzberg, as I am referencing her response titled "5 year old table manners". In your response, you state that each bad habit needs to be tackled one...

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Separate ticket systems for two children?

Posted on 8/4/2018

Question regarding the ticket system. I have a 7 (boy) and 9 (girl) year old. Do I use 2 separate ticket systems, one for each? Or do I use one system for the both of them (they share 5 tickets)...

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Scary storyteller at six

Posted on 8/3/2018

Our 6 yo girl we adopted two years ago loves to have a lot of drama in her games: the dolls and other toys tend to be crying, to be in danger (drowning, being kidnapped by a stranger or by a...

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When does a parent need to intervene with siblings?

Posted on 8/1/2018

I regularly read your newsletter and have read several of your books. I've heard you discuss the importance of kids being responsible for keeping the family peace and using a ticket type system to...

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Nip Out-of-Control Behavior in the Bud

Posted on 7/31/2018

How do I apply John Rosemond's recommendations with three completely out-of-control boys (ages 5, 7, 9)? They don't follow any of the rules, regard all property in the house as their own (tools,...

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Fears of 6 yo Becomes Family Drama

Posted on 7/26/2018

My 6 year old daughter is going through a period of fear after seeing what she deemed a scary part in a movie (this was a Disney movie but she seems to be extremely sensitive and at times seems to...

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Daughter Not Eating Packed Lunch

Posted on 7/19/2018

Hello, I have a follow up question to my last. My daughters teacher keeps informing me daily that my daughter “ didn’t like her lunch” (which is everyday now for a few weeks). I did learn a few...

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9 YO Daughter In Need Of Wake Up Call

Posted on 7/14/2018

My 9 year old daughter is defiant and refuses to go to her room when disciplined. She is too big and strong for me to carry her and she won’t stay even if I manage to get her there. She feels...

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Picky Eater Solution...Stay the Course!

Posted on 7/13/2018

Hello, I have a question about my 7 year old daughter who likes to go through phases of being extremely picky with her food. Majority of the time she eats what is put in front of her even...

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Grow a Man by Growing Flowers

Posted on 7/8/2018

Hi. After being at a 4 hour playdate, my 10 yr old still makes me feel bad for not playing with him when he gets home. How do I handle a 10 yr old boy who needs to be entertained constantly? Is it...

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How to effectively delay consequences for 5,6 yros

Posted on 7/7/2018

I’m struggling to understand how to enact delayed consequences as described in The “Nipping” Principle and could use some suggestions. It’s easy enough to do while on errands as both my 5 and...

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Preparing children for Grandma's death

Posted on 7/1/2018

We have a 2.5 year old and a 5.5 year old; also have a niece and nephew that are 7 and 11 years old. My mother is dying of a terminal cancer and is now on hospice. We have been slowly telling the...

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6 yo Don't Fall for the Drama

Posted on 6/28/2018

When my 6yr old son gets really upset with himself, he has started saying “I hate myself and I wish I was never born.” My son is the middle child of four who is always in trouble. We use the...

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Address marriage issues first.

Posted on 6/27/2018

My husband is a soldier who suffers from PTSD and probably TBI from his time in Combat. He is getting worse and has always refused to get help. When our kids were little they didn’t understand a...

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Managing One-on-One Time

Posted on 6/27/2018

My 4 children are 6, 4, 2, and 6 months. I am kept pretty busy during the day with just feeding and naps and taking care of the house. My children ask for me to play with them often, or to spend...

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Zero Tolerance for Unprovoked Assaults

Posted on 6/23/2018

My 7yo son has recently started shoving and aggressively tackling other kids when they’re playing games. He got tagged in tag, so he shoved the guy. The middle guy caught the ball in keep-away, so...

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