"A father's contribution to his children is primarily a measure of how much he adores their mother. "

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Big Sister 11 wants some space from 8 year old brother

Posted 1 week ago

Thank you so much for the thoughtful and helpful ways you've equipped me as a parent since signing up to this site. I've come to understand that I should let my kids resolve issues they have with...

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Help! Quarantine Has Thrown a Kink in Our Schedule!

Posted 1 week ago

My husband has been working from home for the last few months and this has brought new challenges with our 5 and 6 year old boys. Prior to him working from home I had a routine of them playing in...

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Son hits himself when he loses TV privileges

Posted 2 weeks ago

When my son loses his tv privileges he starts hitting himself, screaming, saying he’s stupid, he hates himself etc and beginning he will do anything to earn tv back (I say no). There clearly is an...

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The Doctor Gets The Wiggles Out

Posted 2 weeks ago

Please can you give me some helpful pointers on how to deal with the issue of my 8 year son not sitting still for some activities. He's a nice, sensitive boy but I can't seem to understand why...

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Talking to Kids About Dyslexia

Posted 3 weeks ago

My son has a moderate case of dyslexia, and he is 10. Our daughter, who is 7, has a mild case of dyslexia. Our son, of course, knows he is dyslexic, however, we have not told our daughter she is...

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Tips for Purging Toys

Posted 3 weeks ago

My kids have too many toys, dolls and stuffed animals. They are ages 10, 7, 4, and 1. For the older three kids can I just get rid of things without their knowing, or do I need to talk to them...

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6 YO Girl Behaving Inappropriately with Friends and Lying About It

Posted on 6/2/2020

Private parts My 6 year old daughter and her friend, a boy have gotten in to trouble lately, because they keep trying to sneak off and pee in front of each other. I’m concerned because they...

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How to Achieve Peaceful Coexistence Between Children

Posted on 5/31/2020

I have a 6-year-old, and 2.5 year old. They are fighting A LOT. What’s the best way to discipline them? I try to let them work it out as much as I can, but it’s constant. Older child ripping toys...

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Complaining 6 year old

Posted on 5/27/2020

Hi, I have a 6 y.o. girl. She has days when she is happy with things, but most of the time she shows a negative attitude. Overall she is a good child. However, no matter what we do or don’t do...

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Teach instead of rescue.

Posted on 5/27/2020

My 11 year old daughter has noticed that her 8 year old brother is academically more able than she is, particularly in Maths. Over the years, we've repeatedly told her to celebrate her own...

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Curbing Unhealthy Snack Attacks

Posted on 5/18/2020

My son is an 8 years old only child. He wasn't a chubby baby, but he's becoming a chubby boy. He's getting a belly and love handles. He is 4'7" and weighs in at 95lbs. His food choices are high...

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Playing with Toy Guns- Keep It Simple

Posted on 5/2/2020

My son has taken an interest in gun play. He likes making guns with blocks of lego and sticks and playing with his nerf gun. I want him to enjoy this play but in a way that is fun and healthy,...

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Helping Kids Develop Good Habits Without Nagging

Posted on 4/14/2020

My 7 year old has a habit of leaving lights on when he leaves the room, leaving the toilet seat up, not flushing the toilet chain, leaving rubbish out, not putting his laundry in basket etc. How...

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7 year old craving constant attention

Posted on 4/14/2020

My 7 year old struggles to play by himself. He wants me to play with him all the time. For example he is always complaining he cannot find a Lego piece before he has actually looked, he needs help...

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Don't overthink it

Posted on 4/14/2020

I am diagnosed with depression, anxiety, OCD and CPTSD and grew up in a very dysfunctional, emotionally abusive and neglectful home. I struggled with post natal depression and never sought help...

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How to Nip Interrupting in the Bud

Posted on 4/1/2020

How would you train your 7 and 4 year olds from interrupting adult conversations?

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Hands Off!

Posted on 3/29/2020

My 7 year is always making stupid annoying loud noises and shouting and he keeps doing this in his 8 month old sisters face. He also constantly grabs her hands and smothers her. They seem to get...

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Co-parenting precautions

Posted on 3/29/2020

My 7 year old son has told me he watches films which are 12+, scary, include swearing, witchcraft (which goes against my Christian Faith) when he stays with his Dad. My son doesn’t seem very...

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10 yo struggles with low self-esteem & social anxiety

Posted on 3/22/2020

My 10 year old is dyslexic, and struggles with low self-esteem and social anxiety. How do I help him with his social anxiety? How do I help him with is low self esteem. Is there a book or two...

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Addressing Food Issues - Part 1

Posted on 3/22/2020

Our kids are 10, 6, 4, and 20 months. The 10, 6, and 4 year olds do not eat their dinners very well. Sometimes they don't eat at all and pick and complain about their food. I get tired of...

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6 Strikes in 1 At-bat

Posted on 3/15/2020

Hi John, my 9yr old daughter has taken to raising her voice, screaming, arguing, sarcasm and just downright disrespect when things aren't going her way. We have a target misbehavior chart and she...

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Take Charge of Bedtime Shenanigans

Posted on 3/12/2020

Feeling frustrated. I have a 6 year old, and 2 year old. They are hanging up on me! For example- I say it’s time for bed, and I tell them to come brush their teeth, the older one starts to...

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Children do not make good parents.

Posted on 3/11/2020

Hello; My son is getting worse as he gets older. He refuses to listen or obey. He talks back at every turn. We took his toys away over a week ago and told him he could get them back after his...

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Spiraling Seven Year Old

Posted on 3/2/2020

I would like some advice on how to handle our 7 year old son. Our family has had an extremely tough season. We had to re-home the dog my children grew up with (my sons best buddy) due to my sons...

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Sibling Must Work it Out!

Posted on 3/1/2020

I have two children: An 8-year-old girl and a 3-year-old boy. For the most part, they play really well on their own. Whenever my daughter doesn’t have school, however, we have conflict. My son...

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Refusal To Eat Leads To Worry

Posted on 2/29/2020

My 7 year old son and his 9 year old sister were playing around while brushing teeth and somehow his tooth brush jammed into the side of his mouth. He needed oral surgery for a herniated buccal...

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Siblings Must Work It Out!

Posted on 2/25/2020

I’ve got two kids, an almost 8 year old girl and a 3 year old boy. For the most part, they play really well on their own. Whenever she doesn’t have school, we have the most conflict. He loves...

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10 Year Old Testing Boundaries

Posted on 2/8/2020

I have been using the alpha speech. I make mistakes sometimes, escalating my voice because I'm frustrated. On the most part I'm pretty consistent. I noticed in alpha speech you do no use...

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Lower the Boom on School Misbehavior

Posted on 1/22/2020

Our seven year old got sent to the principles office today for telling another student "I'm going to kill you". He was already one night into a three night bout of being banished to his room due...

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8 Year Old Loves to Argue with Mom

Posted on 1/21/2020

My almost 8 year old boy has become quite skilled at arguing. In addition to arguing things that are easily proven false, he also contradicts you in casual conversation. I'm not sure if it's just...

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Little Victories

Posted on 1/16/2020

Not a question; more of a comment of thanks. I started the Ticket Method (at home for both home and school behaviors) a week ago and today my son's teacher (1st grade) sent me an email stating...

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6 Year Old Laughs When She Gets In Trouble

Posted on 1/13/2020

Good Morning, We have been using the ticket system and it's worked well. I have a 6 year old girl, who seems to have thrived from it until recently. Now when she loses a ticket she says "i...

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Ticket to change.

Posted on 1/13/2020

My 7-year old son has this habit of expressing his frustration, questioning me, or complaining about what I've told him to do or said, “no” to. He asks, “Why not?” and I answer simply, “Because...

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Time for a Reset

Posted on 1/12/2020

Clarification to my follow up question: When you say impose consequences... often my consequences are extra chores. I do not know what else to offer as a consequence. They're too young to take...

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10-Year-Old Worries about Death

Posted on 1/12/2020

Hello- We have a 10 year old only child who has recently started crying and getting upset about what he will do when we die and how sad he will be. We have tried to reassure him but it’s become a...

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6 and 9 Year Olds Won’t Do Chores

Posted on 1/12/2020

Follow up question: After reviewing chapter 3, i do believe I was using the ticket system properly... my targets were 1. Not doing as told 2. Lying 3. Talking back. The targets were the same...

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Alpha Speech is Key for Getting Kids to Obey

Posted on 1/10/2020

I have 2 girls, 9 & 6. They will not obey. They’ll lie that they did something and I have to verify completion or it’s never done. I used the ticket system and I had to take away every privilege...

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No Way to Treat a 7 Year Old Boy

Posted on 1/8/2020

My son is 7 years old and in 1st grade. He's had some problems with negative self-talk and is disruptive in class. (I think he’s a perfectionist who’s big on justice and is bored). His grades are...

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The Age-Gap Triplicate

Posted on 1/1/2020

My kids (11-girl, 10-girl, 3-boy) were driving me crazy with all the squabbling. Especially as the 3 year old gets older. All 3 kids are on the ticket system. I’ve read a lot of the q & a on here...

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Challenging "smile stones."

Posted on 12/19/2019

My 6 year old daughter visits the school nurse quite often for the tiniest of things. She seems to love the attention she gets when she is hurt... and it seems to happen a lot. She was coming home...

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Shorten bedtime routine

Posted on 12/2/2019

Hello, I have two daughters - an almost 3 year old and a 6 year old. i am married to an airline pilot who needs to regularly be out of town for 4-5 days a week. We make it through the days pretty...

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How Much Allowance Should I Give My Kids?

Posted on 12/2/2019

I have a few questions: In Teenproofing there is talk about allowance not connected to chores. I love the idea of teaching the kids about money responsibility, budgeting, etc., as discussed. Our...

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Forming a United Parenting Front

Posted on 12/1/2019

Hello...fully realizing Mr Rosemond is NOT a marriage counselor I do have a question. I am 70 years old and my spouse is 49. We have a daughter, 10 years old, that is very bright (public school...

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Mom on track with chores, allowance

Posted on 11/30/2019

I keep being advised I should use reward charts/money allowances for good behavior and chores around the house (for almost 7 year old). But, something doesn't sit right with me about this. I cant...

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Kerfuffling Kids

Posted on 11/28/2019

Hi! I have a 9 year old daughter and boy/girl twin 7 year olds. The twins tend to play really nicely together. They are also in the same class and the same group on the swim team. My 9 year old...

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It Takes a Man to Teach a Boy to be a Man

Posted on 11/28/2019

I read John's June articles on fathering and see the pattern he sees all the time: grown-up sons who amount to nothing. I have 3 boys ages 9, 7, and 4 and want much better for them. There are...

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