"Ask a child no questions, the child will tell you no lies. "

Pre-Teen (11-12 years)

John's Most Recent Articles

The Peer Group: When to Do Something, What to Do, and When to Do Nothing

Posted on 5/1/2018

No question about it, the peer group exerts great influence on teenagers. From the way they dress to the way they carry their books, the stamp of peer pressure is upon them. If the influence is...

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Micromanaging Weakens Child's Success in School

Posted on 8/22/2017

Q: Our son attends first grade at the local public school. At the beginning of the school year, all the parents were basically told that we are expected to go to the school’s parent website every...

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Take the Drama out of Math Homework

Posted on 8/30/2016

Q: Our sixth-grade son has always been an excellent math student. This year, however, he melts down every time he does math homework. Within minutes, he becomes highly agitated, begins crying,...

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Selecting the Right Private School

Posted on 8/16/2016

Q: We are looking for a private school for our 4-year-old. Regardless of the school we ultimately choose, we want to keep him there through eighth grade at least. We live in an suburban area so...

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Misplacing a Sense of Purpose

Posted on 12/9/2014

Q: My buddy’s wife walks their 11-year-old into the classroom each day. Then she takes out his assignments and helps him get ready. We’re talking about a very capable kid who has no...

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Pull-Ups & Adoption Age

Posted on 9/16/2014

Q: My 23-month-old son does well with potty training when we’re at home. We use a “potty bell” and he goes every 90 minutes or so. When we’re away from home, however, he seems clueless. He...

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Impulse Control: A Hallmark of Life

Posted on 8/5/2014

A mom recently asked me what I would say to my son if he was twelve years old and wanted a Mohawk haircut for the summer. I told her I’d say no. “But is it really that...

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To Help or Not To Help?

Posted on 6/3/2014

I recently asked a group of 50 teachers: “Raise your hand if you agree that when a child comes to an adult asking for help with an academic problem, the adult should help.” ...

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Good Parenting Decisions

Posted on 5/20/2014

Q: For the first five years of her life, it was just me and my now 13-year-old daughter. I didn’t have a clue as to what I was doing. I wasn’t consistent; I didn’t hold her accountable; I was an...

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Too Old to Cuddle?

Posted on 4/15/2014

Q: My 11-year old son, an only child, continues to ask me to "snuggle" with him and scratch his back at bed time. This is a time for us to read aloud, chat about concerns or questions, and say...

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Recent Questions

Screen time is all up to you!

Posted 1 week ago

I am at my wits end with screen time and Fort Night. I try and stay by a limited number of minutes and it’s never enough and always ends up in a huge battle . I give him an hour he takes five...

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Nip Out-of-Control Behavior in the Bud

Posted 3 weeks ago

How do I apply John Rosemond's recommendations with three completely out-of-control boys (ages 5, 7, 9)? They don't follow any of the rules, regard all property in the house as their own (tools,...

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Reining in Mouthy Eleven Year Old

Posted on 7/9/2018

Hello, John and coaches, I really need help with my eleven year old. She just is so mentally exhausting to me and my husband. She is extremely strong willed and argues everything with me. I am...

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Okay to Throw the Game Plan out the Window?

Posted on 7/8/2018

My husband is a sports nut....I am NOT. To his credit, he sees the insanity kids' sports has become and tends to be very level headed about things. Our 11 year old son plays rec (not the super...

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Preparing children for Grandma's death

Posted on 7/1/2018

We have a 2.5 year old and a 5.5 year old; also have a niece and nephew that are 7 and 11 years old. My mother is dying of a terminal cancer and is now on hospice. We have been slowly telling the...

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Following up with 12 y/o's Sensitivity Issues

Posted on 6/27/2018

Thank you for your response to my question about my 12 year old daughters sensitivity "issues". Later that day, she threw a huge fit over her smart phone and computer as well as us not...

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Address marriage issues first.

Posted on 6/27/2018

My husband is a soldier who suffers from PTSD and probably TBI from his time in Combat. He is getting worse and has always refused to get help. When our kids were little they didn’t understand a...

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12 y/o sensitivities most likely manipulative behavior

Posted on 6/21/2018

My almost 12 year old daughter has been having issues with visual/hearing/touch sensitivities that started when she was 9. These issues have gotten to the point of disrupting not only her life,...

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Tattling

Posted on 6/12/2018

We are still using the ticket system with our children (ages 10, 13, 13, 15) even though we want to eventually move away from it and begin to think along the lines of parenting teens. For now, do...

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No interest in extracurricular activities.

Posted on 6/9/2018

My 11 year old son does not want to participate in any extra curricular activities. He wants to attend school and that is all. I have tried to get him interested in sports, but he starts crying...

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Audio

Parenting the Strong Willed Teen Audio File

Posted on 1/8/2015

This is an entertaining and informative talk on understanding and managing even the most petulant of today’s teenagers. The talk was recorded live before an audience in San Diego, CA and is based...

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