""No" is one of the most character-building words in the English language. Say it often, and mean it. "

Miscellaneous Discipline Problems

John's Most Recent Articles

‘Parenting’ vs Childrearing

Posted 3 days ago

I often go looking for parenting ideas that illustrate the difference between so-called “parenting” and mere childrearing. They abound. My latest find came in the form of a 2018 article on...

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No New Tricks To Raising Kids

Posted on 11/30/2021

What is “gentle parenting”? It did not take much investigation for me to conclude that it is merely a rebranding of the same old, same old parenting babble America’s mental health establishment...

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Fixing Our 'Parent-View'

Posted on 9/28/2021

Most of the problems today’s parents are experiencing in the course of raising children are due to a faulty “parent-view.” Just as one’s worldview consists of attitudes, values, and expectations...

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How To Help Your Child Get More Grit

Posted on 9/7/2021

It’s all over the web, that “grit” thing. Seems like every day, I get some promo for a webinar on how to get more grit, project more grit, or get in touch with your inner grit. So, allow me to...

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Psychological Parenting Is a Prescription for Enabling

Posted on 8/24/2021

Q: In your column, you have often spoken of “psychological parenting.” What, exactly, do you mean by that? A: Answering your question requires that we first unpack the word “parenting,” the...

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Kids Don’t Need Curing, They Need Correcting

Posted on 5/18/2021

No small number of today’s parents view their children through psychological lenses, especially when it comes to misbehavior. Instead of regarding a given misbehavior as simply an error that needs...

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The Futility of Reasoning With Children

Posted on 5/4/2021

Many if not most if not almost all of today’s parents believe in magic words. They do so because the mental health professional community has for fifty years or so told them that children can be...

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The More You Try To Make Child Happy, the More Unhappy They Will Be

Posted on 1/19/2021

Making children happy became a parenting goal in the early 1970s. The paradox, as everyone with a modicum of commonsense knows, is that the more effort parents put into making a child happy, the...

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Moodiness Is Merely a Bad Emotional Habit

Posted on 10/27/2020

Living with an emotionally dramatic child is no fun. They throw wet blankets over nearly every family gathering or outing. Little is right in their lives and attempts to cheer them up generally...

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Parents Can Recover From Not Getting Over the 'Hump of Parenting'

Posted on 10/20/2020

Q: In a recent column, you identified toddlerhood as “the hump of parenting.” As a grandmother who managed to raise five kids who were out of the house in their early twenties and are responsible...

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Recent Questions

Parent Apologies: Choosing Relationship Over Being Right with Adult Child

Posted 1 week ago

This question builds off of a prior one answered by Gretchen Slover. Last summer, my 18-year-old daughter lost about 15-20 pounds. She was at about 130 at her peak and in good shape. My ex-wife...

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Importance of Presenting a United Parenting Front

Posted 3 weeks ago

This may be a complicated question: I have a question about my and my husband's parenting styles. I come from a conservative background, my parents were old school and traditional. Lots of...

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Disciplining With Tickets When Grandma Comes to Town

Posted 4 weeks ago

I just got your book, "The Well Behaved Child," and today I began using tickets (and Alpha speech) for my just 5-year-old son who is very loving and sweet but would be considered a "high...

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I am Woman, Hear Me Roar---Even Though I'm Only 4!

Posted on 12/7/2021

I am at my wits end. I am doing my best to do the ticket system with my children. My 4 year old daughter has maybe made it 1 day, at least until bedtime, without losing all of her tickets since we...

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Clarifying the Garden Kick

Posted on 12/4/2021

Does kicking out of the garden mean the child is confined to their new boring room for the duration of the time? Do you restrict them from playing outside with sibblings or friends? Can they...

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Transition from Nap Time to Quiet Time

Posted on 11/2/2021

Hi, our daughter is 2yrs, 10mo old. What age is appropriate for naps to go away? Our daughter fights naps nearly every day. The problem is that if she doesn’t get a nap is she gets extremely...

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Keep Potty Training Positive- Don't Punish For Accidents

Posted on 11/2/2021

Hi, our daughter is 2yrs 10mo old. We potty trained her 9 months ago using the “naked and $75” method from John Rosemond’s book Toilet Training Without Tantrums. Potty training clicked with her...

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Adopted Daughters Crave Adult Attention

Posted on 10/28/2021

Daughters want too much attention from adults, and are too touchy with them. We have two adopted daughters, ages five and six. Both seem to want an unnatural amount of attention from adults....

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Welcome to the Terrible Twos!

Posted on 10/21/2021

My just turned two year old was always an excellent sleeper after 4 months old, happily going to bed and staying there even through transition to adult bed. The past 4 days he has refused to lay...

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19 Month Old Laughs When Hitting and Pulling Mom's Hair

Posted on 9/24/2021

My 19 month old is very advanced for her age, other than her language which is on track. But she’s already entered her “terrible” two phase and she hits and pulls my hair and laughs about it. I...

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