Discipline Methods (e.g. time-out)

John's Most Recent Articles

School Principal Asks About Discipline

Posted on 10/25/2022

Q: I am a principal at a private church-affiliated school. Contrary to my graduate school training and most of my peers’ practice, I believe disciplinary actions should "fit the crime."...

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'Parenting' vs. Child-Rearing

Posted on 8/23/2022

“The goal of parenting is not to control, coerce or punish children into being ‘good.’ The goal of parenting is to grow children who can feel all of their feelings and become empathic...

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Discipline Differences Between Divorced Parents

Posted on 5/10/2022

Q: We see my husband's 9-year-old son every other weekend and two weeks in the summer. He has major issues in school with both behavior and doing his work. He's well behaved when he's with us, but...

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When To Use Time-outs

Posted on 1/4/2022

I was once an orthodox believer in the power of time-out—the practice of having a child sit in a somewhat isolated chair for five minutes or so immediately after said child has misbehaved. I...

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Time Out for Disrespectful 6-Year-old

Posted on 12/21/2021

Q: Whenever—and I most definitely mean every single time—I ask my six-year-old daughter to do something, she becomes very disrespectful. She stomps her foot, yells at me that I make her do...

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Kids Don’t Need Curing, They Need Correcting

Posted on 5/18/2021

No small number of today’s parents view their children through psychological lenses, especially when it comes to misbehavior. Instead of regarding a given misbehavior as simply an error that needs...

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The Drama of a Child's Feelings

Posted on 4/20/2021

One of the more unfortunate consequences of relying on advice from mental health “experts” concerning parenting matters has been a one-dimensional understanding of child discipline. Because of the...

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Discipline vs. Punishment

Posted on 2/9/2021

Misusing terminology is not simply a matter of semantics. A person who confuses the meaning of words is likely to behave accordingly. That occurred to me during a conversation with...

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Parents Can Recover From Not Getting Over the 'Hump of Parenting'

Posted on 10/20/2020

Q: In a recent column, you identified toddlerhood as “the hump of parenting.” As a grandmother who managed to raise five kids who were out of the house in their early twenties and are responsible...

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Punishment Does Not Cause Mental Health Issues

Posted on 12/31/2019

This is the second in a series on “parent-babble,” as in the same-old, same-old nonsense the mental health industry has been passing off as sound parenting advice since the late 1960s. ...

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Recent Questions

4 YO Not Fazed By Consequences

Posted 1 week ago

I’m struggling to find compelling consequences for my 4 year old. We’ve tried taking away privileges like TV shows and toys, but she quickly moves on. We’ve tried time out, but the effects are...

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When asking doesn't work

Posted 2 weeks ago

Most evenings when we ask my daughters to clean up (6.5 and 4.5 years old) the 4 year old does one or all of the following; whine, says she can't do it, says it's too much, gets distracted, slowly...

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How to hold 5 yro's accountable

Posted on 12/14/2024

I am a single mom of twin boys that are 5. Their father and I have been in court most of the last year in a custody battle. My boys are typically well behaved thanks to reading your books...

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Give Them an Inch...

Posted on 12/8/2024

We are in the process of resetting a slew of bad behaviors (sibling conflict, avoiding responsibility are currently the focus). I'm seeing an increase in defiance/disobedience, both directly and...

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Disciplining Autistic 7YO

Posted on 12/8/2024

I have a 7 year old girl. She is autistic and is a slow learner but isn't incapable. She has been slow in learning how to talk but has known and understood the word no for a long time. I'm having...

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4 YO AGRESSIVE IN SCHOOL

Posted on 10/18/2024

Hello. We have a 4yr old son who is hitting other students, throwing toys and ignoring teacher's instructions. He has 4 incidents in 2 days and has been suspended for one day from school. In one...

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Mass Confusion Has Taken Over!

Posted on 9/27/2024

I need a reset with our boys, ages 11, 9, 6 & 5. After a season of intense caring for our baby and 2-year-old daughter, things have become a disaster. The top misbehaviors in the house are...

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3 YO SWATS THE AIR INSTEAD OF HITTING

Posted on 9/14/2024

My 3.5-year-old son has always been a strong-willed child. About 6 months ago, we started using your discipline methods which have been great. Before that, we relied heavily on spanking but it...

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The Ticket System

Posted on 9/13/2024

We are using John's Ticket System. Should my 4-year-old lose all 5 tickets before lunchtime? Is it reasonable to confine said 4-year-old to his room for the remainder of the day with the exception...

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WATCHED VIDEO...WHAT NEXT?

Posted on 9/9/2024

I watched the 7 part video series and I’m wondering what to do if the child is still not complying after you follow those steps. Say I tell my 6 year old to get out of the trampoline and she says...

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Audio

Parenting Through Proper Discipline

Posted on 6/15/2023

Firm, consistent discipline is foundational to proper parenting, but it can be one of the hardest challenges parents will face. In this session, you'll learn about: • The Rules of...

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Video

Parenting Through Proper Discipline

Posted on 10/13/2023

Firm, consistent discipline is foundational to proper parenting, but it can be one of the hardest challenges parents will face. Approximate runtime: 37 minutes <b>Member Price:...

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