""No" is one of the most character-building words in the English language. Say it often, and mean it. "

Respect

John's Most Recent Articles

Time Out for Disrespectful 6-Year-old

Posted on 12/21/2021

Q: Whenever—and I most definitely mean every single time—I ask my six-year-old daughter to do something, she becomes very disrespectful. She stomps her foot, yells at me that I make her do...

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Four Steps To Give Argumentative Teenager the Last Word (and Restore Sanity)

Posted on 6/8/2021

Q: My fifteen-year-old daughter is slowly driving me insane! She argues with me about everything and always wants the last word. No matter how well I explain the “why?” of a decision to her, she...

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The More You Try To Make Child Happy, the More Unhappy They Will Be

Posted on 1/19/2021

Making children happy became a parenting goal in the early 1970s. The paradox, as everyone with a modicum of commonsense knows, is that the more effort parents put into making a child happy, the...

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Recent Questions

You're in Charge Now

Posted 1 week ago

Okay so I’m ready to administer a discipline plan for my daughter. My questions are; 1. How much is too much? I’m ready to take a lot of her favorite things away. But, what about life...

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Parent Apologies: Choosing Relationship Over Being Right with Adult Child

Posted 1 week ago

This question builds off of a prior one answered by Gretchen Slover. Last summer, my 18-year-old daughter lost about 15-20 pounds. She was at about 130 at her peak and in good shape. My ex-wife...

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Perfect time for a reset

Posted 1 week ago

Our 9yo girls currently rule the roost. They speak to us flippantly, complain constantly, whine and pester after receiving a "no" answer, expect others to fetch/carry for them, ignore directives...

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Disciplining With Tickets When Grandma Comes to Town

Posted 4 weeks ago

I just got your book, "The Well Behaved Child," and today I began using tickets (and Alpha speech) for my just 5-year-old son who is very loving and sweet but would be considered a "high...

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Clarifying the Garden Kick

Posted on 12/4/2021

Does kicking out of the garden mean the child is confined to their new boring room for the duration of the time? Do you restrict them from playing outside with sibblings or friends? Can they...

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Awakened Mom Wants Respectful 8 year old Son

Posted on 11/24/2021

I have a 7, almost 8 year old son, who has not ever been appropriately disciplined and has developed into a challenging and, dare I say, entitled child. He has little respect for me and when I...

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Nip It. Nip It Good.

Posted on 11/17/2021

Hi ParentGuru, I have a question about our 5yr old son who has come home from prep (1st year of primary school here in Melbourne Australia) after an incident in which he threw another student's...

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Transition from Nap Time to Quiet Time

Posted on 11/2/2021

Hi, our daughter is 2yrs, 10mo old. What age is appropriate for naps to go away? Our daughter fights naps nearly every day. The problem is that if she doesn’t get a nap is she gets extremely...

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Five Year Old Slugger

Posted on 11/1/2021

Hello! We have a 5 year old who has been having some big problems hitting his parents and tutor. Although we have been using the ticket system for several months, his yelling and physicality have...

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Who Are You? (And what have you done with our daughter?)

Posted on 10/26/2021

Since June 2020, my daughter (who is now 14) has become someone I no longer recognize. When school was closed due to COVID-19, I made the terrible choice and let her have her phone 24/7, which has...

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