"How do you get a child to do what he's told the first time he's told? Don't ever repeat yourself. "

Older Teen/High School (16-18 years)

John's Most Recent Articles

Simple Solutions for Teens, Tantrums and Smartphones

Posted on 12/4/2018

Q: Our 15-year-old daughter is very demanding and, to be honest, self-centered. One of the things she does is ask one of us for something and demand an instant decision, as in, “Can I go to the...

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Make 'Em an Offer They Can't Refuse

Posted on 10/16/2018

When I was a child, my most important possession was my bicycle, followed closely by my radio. My bike was how I got around. I rode it to school, friend’s houses, pick-up...

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15-Year-Old Daughter Should Not Get Private Time With 20-Year-Old Boyfriend

Posted on 6/13/2018

Q: Our 15-year-old daughter has told us she’s in love with a 20-year-old guy who is in the Army and intending to make the Army his career. We’ve met him, and he is extremely respectful and...

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The Peer Group: When to Do Something, What to Do, and When to Do Nothing

Posted on 5/1/2018

No question about it, the peer group exerts great influence on teenagers. From the way they dress to the way they carry their books, the stamp of peer pressure is upon them. If the influence is...

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Parents of Unmotivated Teen Should Stop Stressing

Posted on 4/25/2018

Q: Our 17-year-old son is flunking his junior year in high school. Flunking is not a possibility; it is a definite, a done deal. He has passed the point where he could turn this around. He’s very...

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Are College Visits Necessary?

Posted on 1/3/2018

Q: Our 17-year-old daughter wants to begin visiting colleges. She’s a high-school junior this year and this is when the college visitations begin. We’re feeling like the Grinches Who Stole...

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Celebrate Son's Chosen Education, Career Path

Posted on 12/13/2017

Q: Our 18-year-old son made only slightly better than average grades in high school and finished in the top half of his graduating class. He could have done better, but has a history of...

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Micromanaging Weakens Child's Success in School

Posted on 8/22/2017

Q: Our son attends first grade at the local public school. At the beginning of the school year, all the parents were basically told that we are expected to go to the school’s parent website every...

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Teen Using Pot Should Lose Car, Phone

Posted on 8/16/2017

Q: A few months after he got his driver’s license, we found a bag of marijuana in our 16-year-old son’s car. He swore it wasn’t his and that he didn’t know whose it was and that he’s never used...

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Stay the Course With Rebellious Teen

Posted on 5/23/2017

Q: Our 18-year-old daughter is a month away from high school graduation and she is failing nearly every class! About six months ago, she took up with a group of young adults who are less than...

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Recent Questions

Kicking An Angry 17 Year Old Out Of The Garden of Eden

Posted 1 week ago

Our 17 year old son is completely out of control. None of the consequences that we have given him have helped. His biggest problem is his angry outbursts. He has destroyed his relationship with...

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Teaching Values to Teenagers

Posted on 3/18/2019

Good morning, How do I address a difference in values with my 18 year old son? He will graduate in 2 months so still lives at home. He is materialistic and very focused on brands and "image". He...

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Let Go or No?

Posted on 3/16/2019

My 16 year old son wants to live with his dad in another state for his junior and senior years of high school. I’m reluctantly willing to let him go. How do I navigate this transition?

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Trim Teen Talk Time?

Posted on 2/22/2019

My son will be 16 In a month. When he was younger, he and I (his mother) would have 'talk time' - when we would lie in bed before he went to sleep to talk, share, etc. We stopped doing that a...

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Lifestyle Advice

Posted on 1/31/2019

About 18 months ago, our now 16 year old son told us he is gay. We have a good relationship with him. He is a Christian as are we. Our family goes to church every week and is very involved in...

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The Defiant Young Adult

Posted on 1/31/2019

My son turns 18 tomorrow. He seems to think this means he can do whatever he wants, including not doing what I ask. He is picking his girlfriend up at the airport this evening and I told him he...

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16 year old lacks motivation

Posted on 12/9/2018

My son has become increasingly argumentative and disrespectful. He only seems to care about material things. He is now 16 years old and he is working with a job coach to help him with getting a...

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To Curfew or Not To Curfew

Posted on 11/7/2018

My 18 yr old daughter attends college but lives at home. She makes stellar grades and is attending on a merit scholarship. She does chores around the house. She is a responsible person. My...

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Dad's Not on Board

Posted on 11/4/2018

Hi there, Susan Morley recently answered a question I posed concerning my son who has been caught with vape materials. She recommended strict consequences which I want to impose. His father,...

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Worried Grandmother

Posted on 11/3/2018

My granddaughter has OCD and has a therapist and a psychiatrist (who prescribes meds). I read your article stating you feel that kids with anxiety, mental health issues do not need meds. Does...

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Audio

Parenting the Strong Willed Teen Audio File

Posted on 1/8/2015

This is an entertaining and informative talk on understanding and managing even the most petulant of today’s teenagers. The talk was recorded live before an audience in San Diego, CA and is based...

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