"If; when your child does something "bad," you feel bad about it, your child won't. "

Older Teen/High School (16-18 years)

John's Most Recent Articles

Teen Not a Suicide Risk

Posted on 7/23/2019

My recent column pertaining to a 12-year-old who told his parents he’d thought about suicide several times over the past six months stirred a fair number of folks to respond. Feelings toward the...

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How to Talk to Teens About Internet Pornography

Posted on 7/16/2019

Q: We recently discovered that our 12-year-old has been visiting pornography sites of all sorts on the Internet. When we caught him red-handed, he began crying and said he is addicted. Apparently,...

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Simple Solutions for Teens, Tantrums and Smartphones

Posted on 12/4/2018

Q: Our 15-year-old daughter is very demanding and, to be honest, self-centered. One of the things she does is ask one of us for something and demand an instant decision, as in, “Can I go to the...

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Make 'Em an Offer They Can't Refuse

Posted on 10/16/2018

When I was a child, my most important possession was my bicycle, followed closely by my radio. My bike was how I got around. I rode it to school, friend’s houses, pick-up...

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15-Year-Old Daughter Should Not Get Private Time With 20-Year-Old Boyfriend

Posted on 6/13/2018

Q: Our 15-year-old daughter has told us she’s in love with a 20-year-old guy who is in the Army and intending to make the Army his career. We’ve met him, and he is extremely respectful and...

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The Peer Group: When to Do Something, What to Do, and When to Do Nothing

Posted on 5/1/2018

No question about it, the peer group exerts great influence on teenagers. From the way they dress to the way they carry their books, the stamp of peer pressure is upon them. If the influence is...

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Parents of Unmotivated Teen Should Stop Stressing

Posted on 4/25/2018

Q: Our 17-year-old son is flunking his junior year in high school. Flunking is not a possibility; it is a definite, a done deal. He has passed the point where he could turn this around. He’s very...

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Are College Visits Necessary?

Posted on 1/3/2018

Q: Our 17-year-old daughter wants to begin visiting colleges. She’s a high-school junior this year and this is when the college visitations begin. We’re feeling like the Grinches Who Stole...

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Celebrate Son's Chosen Education, Career Path

Posted on 12/13/2017

Q: Our 18-year-old son made only slightly better than average grades in high school and finished in the top half of his graduating class. He could have done better, but has a history of...

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Micromanaging Weakens Child's Success in School

Posted on 8/22/2017

Q: Our son attends first grade at the local public school. At the beginning of the school year, all the parents were basically told that we are expected to go to the school’s parent website every...

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Recent Questions

Defining family morals.

Posted 2 weeks ago

My husband and I recently found out that our 16 year old son is having sex with his girlfriend. As you can imagine, we are extremely disappointed. We aren't sure what to do, if anything. Our...

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God's Anointing was an Annoyed Teen

Posted on 7/14/2019

16 year old does not want to attend church. Should we expect her go most of the time? We've told her she can take breaks because we understand our small church does not have teens her age, other...

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16 YO Boy Loses Job, Lies, & Vapes

Posted on 7/8/2019

Our 16 you son was fired from his first job today at a pet grooming shop. We know the owner as we've been taking our pets there for over 9 years. The owner called us to explain that our son had...

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It's Not Too Late!

Posted on 7/8/2019

Semi-independence has reared its ugly head in our youngest who goes off to college in the fall. Our mostly obedient and kindhearted daughter has basically grown a head so big we are surprised she...

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Parents Concerned about Sexually Active 16-Year-Old

Posted on 6/25/2019

Our 16 year old daughter has lost her virginity. I am concerned that she is continuing to be sexually active. I don’t know when she would have the opportunity but I’m Not naive to the possibility...

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18 YO Dating Abusive Man

Posted on 6/23/2019

Should I stop by 18 year old from dating a guy who is verbally abusive to her? My daughter listens to all the red flags about this boy and agrees. Yet she says she needs time to end it. After...

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Beating the Bullies

Posted on 6/20/2019

Here’s a topic I’ve been struggling with that I just saw John address in a Facebook post – mean kids. My oldest son (9) was complaining about some kids at his summer camp saying things like...

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Going With Your Gut

Posted on 6/5/2019

I have a 17 yo daughter. I foolishly gave in to giving her an iPhone when she was 13. My husband died 4 years ago. Because of a rebellious attitude of her older sister, I realized these iPhones...

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Why 17 YO Boy Lied?

Posted on 5/17/2019

Last week my 17 year old son lied to us. Blatantly and obviously. Together we attended a school band event, the kids were allowed to stay for a DJ and dance. My son texted me and asked if it...

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Kicking An Angry 17 Year Old Out Of The Garden of Eden

Posted on 4/13/2019

Our 17 year old son is completely out of control. None of the consequences that we have given him have helped. His biggest problem is his angry outbursts. He has destroyed his relationship with...

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Audio

Parenting the Strong Willed Teen Audio File

Posted on 1/8/2015

This is an entertaining and informative talk on understanding and managing even the most petulant of today’s teenagers. The talk was recorded live before an audience in San Diego, CA and is based...

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