"There are no argumentative children; only adults who argue with children."

Mothers

John's Most Recent Articles

‘Good Mommy Club’ Does No Favors for Kids

Posted on 5/12/2020

The biggest problem in the life of today’s all-too typical mother is herself. She is her own worst enemy. Them’s fightin’ words, I know, but please, hold the tomatoes and other vegetables and bear...

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Proper Discipline of a Child Is an Act of Love for One’s Neighbor

Posted on 3/10/2020

I’ve learned a new word! My daughter informs me that according to some mothers I am guilty of “mom-shaming” and should be ashamed of myself. I am an unashamed mom-shamer because I happen to...

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Maternabling is Destructive to Parent-Child Relationship

Posted on 12/10/2019

“You’ve accused mothers of being in co-dependent relationships with their children,” she (a journalist) said, then asked, “What is co-dependency, exactly, and how does it apply to today’s...

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What Constitutes a Good Mother?

Posted on 5/16/2017

By the time this column appears in most papers to which it is distributed, Mother’s Day 2017 will have come and gone. Nonetheless, I’m going to talk about mothers—one in particular. ...

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Hey, Moms: There's More to Life Than Raising Children

Posted on 3/8/2017

A couple of months ago, following a talk I gave in Georgia, a woman told me she had been offended by my many references to mothers who are enmeshed in their children's lives. These women, when...

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Use Practical, Not Psychological, Approach to Childrearing

Posted on 1/3/2017

One of the biggest problems among today’s parents—especially mothers—concerns their tendency to think in psychological terms about their children’s behavior problems. Mothers are more prone to...

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In a Family, Parents' Relationship Comes First

Posted on 12/28/2016

I recently asked a married couple who have three kids, none of whom are yet teens, “Who are the most important people in your family?” Like all good moms and dads of this brave new...

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Adults, Especially Moms: Keep It Interesting!

Posted on 5/27/2015

My mother was a most unusual woman for her generation. She divorced my father when I was three, went to college and eventually obtained a Ph.D. in plant morphology when women were not heartily...

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Micromanaging Mom and Uninvolved Father

Posted on 11/29/2011

The micromanager mom and the man-child dad Devon Corneal is an attorney and a writer. Her essay "Can You Hear Me Now? Why Parents Can't Get Kids to Listen" was published online by The...

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Give Children What They Need and Little of What They Want

Posted on 11/22/2011

Respect children; don't idolize them A young mother who identified herself as a practitioner of "attachment parenting" recently told me that "children should be approached with reverence." I...

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Recent Questions

Unwell Mom Struggles with Screen Time Abuse

Posted 1 week ago

I am really unwell at the moment and my son is being kept home from school, I also have a 1 year old. I am trying to look after both while I get through this illness. Discipline has slided and...

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Disrespectful 8-Year-Old

Posted 1 week ago

We have noticed more ungrateful and entitled behavior in my 8 year old son recently. During a trip to the zoo, he became upset and was rude and disrespectful when I would not buy him food and ice...

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Welcome to the Terrible Twos!

Posted on 8/30/2020

When I get ready in the morning I let my 21 month old play with cotton balls and bandaids and other non harmful bathroom supplies. When I was done I told him to pick up the the cotton balls (he...

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Soldiers and Cars and Football-Card Stars: that's what little boys are made of

Posted on 7/26/2020

My child always wants me to play with him. He wants me to play football cards, army, cars boys games that I have absolutely no interest in. I feel forced and resentful so I say no, I can read...

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Parents Need to Be On The Same Page

Posted on 7/23/2020

What if both parents in the home are not on the same page, can bad behavior be corrected?

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Cutting the Mealtime Cord

Posted on 7/18/2020

Hello! Our second and youngest daughter is going on three in a month. I am wondering about realistic expectations at the dinner table for her; especially if she is able to eat herself and can...

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My Toddlers Are Ignoring Me

Posted on 7/5/2020

For a few months now, my toddlers (both age 2.5) have stopped wanting to hang out with me. They're both pretty good at playing independently and occupying themselves, and they seem to enjoy it....

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What to Do About Screen Addiction?

Posted on 7/5/2020

My 11-year-old son is obsessed with screens. If we tell him to do something while he is on his phone or iPad he huffs and puffs or we are told, “in a minute." Then he only gets 2 out of 3 chores...

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When Mom Makes a Mistake

Posted on 6/28/2020

What is the best way to recover after making a mistake? For instance, if 3 children are very close in age, and you punish the wrong child for something you later find out their sibling had done.

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Emotional Intelligence Begins With Good Manners

Posted on 6/14/2020

Are you familiar with the term 2e kids? Or twice exceptional? Our 10 year old son appears to fall into this category. He is at above average intelligence, but his emotional iq is lacking and a...

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