Disobedience/Defiance
John's Most Recent Articles
Homeschool Discipline Problems
Posted 3 weeks ago
Q: Ever since toddlerhood, we have had significant behavior problems with our 6-year-old son—defiance and general disrespect, mostly. We have tried various disciplinary approaches with...
Read More'Parenting' vs. Child-Rearing
Posted on 8/23/2022
“The goal of parenting is not to control, coerce or punish children into being ‘good.’ The goal of parenting is to grow children who can feel all of their feelings and become empathic...
Read MoreBack Off on Daughter’s Eyeliner Use
Posted on 6/28/2022
Q: Our 14-year-old daughter is a rising high school sophomore. We let her wear eyeliner this past year, but she is wearing entirely too much. She is well-adjusted (plays sports, good grades) but...
Read MoreWhat Should Single Mom Do About Disrespectful Son?
Posted on 6/7/2022
Q: I’m a single mother with a 13-year-old son. His father, whom he sees infrequently, has PTSD from battle experiences. My son has anger toward his father, but I can’t get him to talk about it....
Read MoreKids Need Parents Who Are Authentic Adults
Posted on 3/22/2022
The contemporary parenting ideal consists of equal parts fixer, go-fer, and friend, which is why, when it is encountered in the flesh by someone of my ancient age, the new definition of a “good...
Read MoreIs This Battle Worth It?
Posted on 12/29/2021
Q: I have six-month- and thirty-two-month-old boys. The older one—well-mannered, easy going, very affectionate—attends a preschool program three mornings a week. This is his second year there. ...
Read MoreTime Out for Disrespectful 6-Year-old
Posted on 12/21/2021
Q: Whenever—and I most definitely mean every single time—I ask my six-year-old daughter to do something, she becomes very disrespectful. She stomps her foot, yells at me that I make her do...
Read MoreUsing the ‘Dry Run’ for Tantrums
Posted on 11/16/2021
Q: My almost four-year-old daughter is generally well-behaved except for screaming and running away from me when we leave a store, the library, etc. before she’s ready to go. She pulls away from...
Read MoreKids Don’t Need Curing, They Need Correcting
Posted on 5/18/2021
No small number of today’s parents view their children through psychological lenses, especially when it comes to misbehavior. Instead of regarding a given misbehavior as simply an error that needs...
Read MoreEar Infections and Misbehavior; Boundaries for Boys
Posted on 3/23/2021
Q: My three-year-old is prone to ear infections. When he has one, his behavior deteriorates considerably. He becomes disobedient and given to angry outbursts. When his ears are clear, he’s...
Read MoreRecent Questions
Raising Believers
Posted on 8/30/2022
We just started the ticket system and we have one target misbehavior for our 4 year old. Following directions. For example, when he loses a ticket because he doesn’t listen when we ask him to...
Read MoreThe Compass Points South: A 15-Year-Old’s Craving for Independence
Posted on 8/29/2022
I have a 15 year old daughter that I used to call my "compass" as she was such an easy child to raise. But, the last 2 years have been difficult. Now, I haven't spoken to her for 3 days because I...
Read MoreGRANDPARENT TRAVAILS REDUX
Posted on 8/23/2022
John, Hi, my sons are grown now, enjoyed your columns, WE have 1 grandson . His Dad, my son, was spoiled so it seems to be continuing unfortunately. Question: now that Roman is 3, doesn't...
Read More"Boxers on the Noggin'": The Silliness of a Boy--and his Disobedience
Posted on 7/19/2022
This is regarding the card system. The rules we initially established are: no hitting/kicking, no throwing and do what mom and dad say. So, sometimes we will be getting dressed and he’s being...
Read More10-Year-Old Not Getting the Message
Posted on 6/16/2022
My ten-year-old son has recently been misbehaving at school with a friend. First, the teacher informed us that after the class was told not to play hide and seek inside the school building during...
Read More11 YO DISRESPECTS STEPMOTHER
Posted on 6/11/2022
My husband and I need help dealing with my 11 year old stepdaughter's disrespectful attitude towards us. I have been in her life for 6 years and this is an area that has been an issue the entire...
Read MorePosted on 5/27/2022
.Our 16-year daughter is the last of three children. Our son is 29 and resides in South Africa with his wife. Our daughter, 20, has returned from college this summer. My husband believes in...
Read MoreTime for a Reboot
Posted on 5/18/2022
Since the first email our son (8yrs) was operated on for septic arthritis 6 months ago. The pain returned 2weeks ago (now gone). His hip bone has a small weakness and he needs to ensure he has no...
Read MorePosted on 5/15/2022
My 3.5 year old thinks he is running the show. He is bossy, and doing insubordination and attention seeking behaviors. I read your books and he was an easy toddler. But dad I forgot to use alpha...
Read MoreLet 3-Year-Old Know You Mean Business!
Posted on 4/19/2022
My child is 3 and a half and has started talking back and hitting. Putting him in his room doesn't help. He comes right out. Suggestions?
Read MoreTopics Covered
- ADHD and other disorders
- Adoption/Foster Parent
- Aggression
- Allowances
- Alpha Speech
- Anxieties, Fears
- Arguments with Children
- Audio Files
- Bedtime/Sleep
- Bedwetting
- Bullies/Bullying
- Character/Values (teaching)
- Chores/Responsibilities
- College
- Consequences/Punishment
- Daycare/Preschool
- Depression/Self-Harm
- Developmental Issues (e.g. late talking)
- Discipline Methods (e.g. time-out)
- Disobedience/Defiance
- Divorce/Custody
- Drugs (marijuana, cocaine, etc.)
- Education
- Electronics (Computers/Video Games/Television/Cell Phones)
- Elementary School
- Extracurricular Activities/Hobbies
- Father
- Food/Eating Problems
- Gender
- Grandparents/Grandchildren
- High School
- Homeschooling
- Homework
- John's Discipline Methods
- Learning Disabilities
- Lying
- Manners
- Marriage Issues
- Mealtime/Eating
- Mental Health
- Miscellaneous Discipline Problems
- Miscellaneous Editorial Columns
- Mothers
- Only Children
- Pacifiers/Security Blankets/Thumbsucking
- Parent Leadership and Authority
- Play
- Preschool
- Rebellious Behavior
- Respect
- Rewards
- School Issues
- Self-Esteem
- Shyness
- Sibling Conflict
- Single Parents
- Social Issues (fighting/arguing with friends)
- Socialization/Social Skills
- Spanking
- Step-Families
- Tantrums
- Teenage Issues
- Terrible Twos
- Toilet Training
