Questions
12 Year-Old Boy Won’t Accept “No”
Posted 2 weeks ago
We implemented a plan to help our 12 year old son learn the importance of keeping his room clean: He must keep it clean for ten days in order to order anything online, get a ride, etc. He did it...
Read MoreDiscipline at home for behavior at school
Posted on 4/19/2023
We have already raised our 4 daughters, the youngest is 24. We are currently, for some incredible reasons, in our third month of fostering to adopt a young child. Things at home are slowly...
Read MoreNot getting his way head banger.
Posted on 3/16/2023
Hi, My 18 month old son will bang his head against me when I am carrying him if he is angry or does not get his way. For example after playing outside, I will announce it is time to go inside and...
Read MoreKIDS RUINING SPRING BREAK VACATION
Posted on 3/15/2023
We are on Spring Break and our kids have not been listening/obeying. Thus, we took away dinners out and got a babysitter and also removed their privilege of playing tennis because that was where...
Read MoreUnsolicited Advice?
Posted on 2/26/2023
Our son and daughter in law were telling us their 4 year old son (our grandson) hits his mom when he gets angry. She said she puts him in his room and he kicks and screams and throws a fit and...
Read MoreProgress isn't Linear
Posted on 2/16/2023
After a wonderful 2 hours of the morning, my son was sent to his room again around 8am for jumping on and scratching his dad while dad and the baby were on the couch. However, we had to go to a...
Read MoreTime to Turn the Tables on 4-Year-Old
Posted on 2/5/2023
My husband and I own and operate a private preschool. Our son is 4 1/2 years old is currently has been enrolled in our school since September 2021. Over the course of his enrollment, our son...
Read MoreA TYRANT IN THE MAKING
Posted on 1/23/2023
Any suggestions to tactfully tell your adult parenting children that they are making a monster out of their 4 year old by trying to coddle him at every snag in his day. They are using some...
Read MoreAttention-Getting Antics Working for 4YO
Posted on 1/12/2023
Our question is about punishment for our 4½ year old girl. Usually we ask her to stand in a circle on the floor, or we send her to her room for the rest of the night, or a fixed amount of time, no...
Read MoreAnger Mismanagement
Posted on 1/4/2023
My 11.5 year old, quite academic son, is very respectful outside home and loved by his teachers. In past few years he is lacking anger management and becomes disrespectful (especially with mom)...
Read MoreThe Doctor is In
Posted on 11/29/2022
Help! Our daughter is 5 and has become defiant and disobedient. For example she will come to us and say "I know I'm not supposed to (enter action) but I did." She said she's being truthful by...
Read MorePest Control
Posted on 11/17/2022
Our 5-year-old daughter has come a long way with her behavior in the last year, but the top two biggest issues still are 1) her never ending pestering and annoying. She pesters and annoys those...
Read MoreSilly boy, listening is for kids
Posted on 11/13/2022
Our 4 year old was a pretty good listener right up to when he turned 4. We've weathered some big tantrums, which seem to mostly be in decline (frequency & length). Now, he has started to just "be...
Read More10 Year Old with Violent Fits, Divorced Parents and "trifecta of diagnoses"
Posted on 10/13/2022
My 10 year old son has the adoptive trifecta of diagnoses: "on the autism spectrum", oppositional defiant disorder, and ADHD. Sometimes he has violent fits - although now they're down to 1 or 2...
Read More10 YEAR OLD WITH DEMONS?
Posted on 10/5/2022
I have been asking questions and seeking advice for a time. Had a coach, but my husband discontinued service. Last time I wrote I mentioned, My husband said we should cut it at the root. He...
Read MoreRaising Believers
Posted on 8/30/2022
We just started the ticket system and we have one target misbehavior for our 4 year old. Following directions. For example, when he loses a ticket because he doesn’t listen when we ask him to...
Read MoreThe Compass Points South: A 15-Year-Old’s Craving for Independence
Posted on 8/29/2022
I have a 15 year old daughter that I used to call my "compass" as she was such an easy child to raise. But, the last 2 years have been difficult. Now, I haven't spoken to her for 3 days because I...
Read MoreGRANDPARENT TRAVAILS REDUX
Posted on 8/23/2022
John, Hi, my sons are grown now, enjoyed your columns, WE have 1 grandson . His Dad, my son, was spoiled so it seems to be continuing unfortunately. Question: now that Roman is 3, doesn't...
Read More"Boxers on the Noggin'": The Silliness of a Boy--and his Disobedience
Posted on 7/19/2022
This is regarding the card system. The rules we initially established are: no hitting/kicking, no throwing and do what mom and dad say. So, sometimes we will be getting dressed and he’s being...
Read More10-Year-Old Not Getting the Message
Posted on 6/16/2022
My ten-year-old son has recently been misbehaving at school with a friend. First, the teacher informed us that after the class was told not to play hide and seek inside the school building during...
Read More11 YO DISRESPECTS STEPMOTHER
Posted on 6/11/2022
My husband and I need help dealing with my 11 year old stepdaughter's disrespectful attitude towards us. I have been in her life for 6 years and this is an area that has been an issue the entire...
Read MorePosted on 5/27/2022
.Our 16-year daughter is the last of three children. Our son is 29 and resides in South Africa with his wife. Our daughter, 20, has returned from college this summer. My husband believes in...
Read MoreTime for a Reboot
Posted on 5/18/2022
Since the first email our son (8yrs) was operated on for septic arthritis 6 months ago. The pain returned 2weeks ago (now gone). His hip bone has a small weakness and he needs to ensure he has no...
Read MorePosted on 5/15/2022
My 3.5 year old thinks he is running the show. He is bossy, and doing insubordination and attention seeking behaviors. I read your books and he was an easy toddler. But dad I forgot to use alpha...
Read MoreLet 3-Year-Old Know You Mean Business!
Posted on 4/19/2022
My child is 3 and a half and has started talking back and hitting. Putting him in his room doesn't help. He comes right out. Suggestions?
Read MoreFifteen-Year-Old Screen Addict
Posted on 4/18/2022
Our 15-year-old recently threw a fit, including punching, cursing and breaking things during the following incidents: 1) Took away make up after sneak purchase of $200 worth of make up without...
Read MoreParents Need To Be on The Same Page
Posted on 4/14/2022
In order to apply garden kick, should both parents sit down with the child and go over all the consequences for breaking family rules? One issue with my daughter is phone, I had asked her phone...
Read MoreExhausted and Longing for Peace
Posted on 4/4/2022
Discovering your books has put us on a new trajectory in our family after years of struggle with our "high misbehavior" 5 year old. For several months we've used the ticket system and "kicked him...
Read More8-Year-Old Needs the Ticket to Self Control
Posted on 4/4/2022
My 8-year-old has a severe temper. He is the third out of six children, and we are homeschooling the other five. He will spend a week at my mother's house and is calm there, but when he gets back...
Read More8 year old needs the ticket to self control
Posted on 3/28/2022
My red-headed 8-year-old has a severe temper. He is the third out of six children and we are homeschooling the other five. He will spend a week at my mother's house for a week and he seems calm...
Read MoreMiddle of the Night Snacks Prolonging Mealtime Battles
Posted on 3/20/2022
In September I asked for advice on my picky 2-year-old. For 6 months, I have consistently tried the methods recommended. I didn't fuss over meals, just gave him small amounts of whatever I made,...
Read MoreIt's Not About the Makeup: Time for a Garden Kick
Posted on 3/20/2022
15-year old daughter very obsessed with make-up. Used our Amazon account to buy makeup Products without our knowing till I looked up order history. Took away all her makeup products, went...
Read MoreWake-Up Call Needed ASAP
Posted on 3/20/2022
Our 9-year-old is perfectly functional in a school setting (no issues with socializing, is meeting most benchmarks, is polite and caring). At home and when we are in public as a family, it is...
Read MoreParental Leadership is Critical
Posted on 3/10/2022
Good afternoon, My 5, almost 6, year old son is struggling, in school and at home, with impulse control and tantrums. Today, he got in trouble at school for spitting on the carpet and another...
Read More6-Year Old Fit-Pitching: Stay Strong, Mom!
Posted on 2/12/2022
Our six and a half year old is not getting her responsibilities completed on school nights. She is in school all day and then goes to an after school program for a couple of hours (we both work)....
Read MoreLittle Runaway
Posted on 2/10/2022
Our 11 yr old son has been spending a lot of time in room due to behavior and losing tickets. He decided yesterday after losing his tickets that he had enough and was running away. He has said...
Read MoreYou're in Charge Now
Posted on 1/21/2022
Okay so I’m ready to administer a discipline plan for my daughter. My questions are; 1. How much is too much? I’m ready to take a lot of her favorite things away. But, what about life...
Read MoreSilly Bedtime Brothers
Posted on 1/18/2022
Our older two boys, 5 and 7, go crazy at bedtime. They are silly, which is fine, but in being silly they make messes and are often disrespectful. After going to bed, we can hear them laughing and...
Read MorePerfect time for a reset
Posted on 1/18/2022
Our 9yo girls currently rule the roost. They speak to us flippantly, complain constantly, whine and pester after receiving a "no" answer, expect others to fetch/carry for them, ignore directives...
Read MoreWhat to Say, What to Do?
Posted on 1/4/2022
How much to say of what we know? We randomly review our 15 year old daughter's school laptop. We just did so for the first time this school year a few days ago. We found screenshots of messages...
Read MoreImportance of Presenting a United Parenting Front
Posted on 1/2/2022
This may be a complicated question: I have a question about my and my husband's parenting styles. I come from a conservative background, my parents were old school and traditional. Lots of...
Read MorePosted on 12/30/2021
We have an 8-year-old son who throws violent tantrums. He has always been “a handful” so these fits aren’t anything new, they’re less frequent but much more destructive. In the past, we had a...
Read MoreDisciplining With Tickets When Grandma Comes to Town
Posted on 12/29/2021
I just got your book, "The Well Behaved Child," and today I began using tickets (and Alpha speech) for my just 5-year-old son who is very loving and sweet but would be considered a "high...
Read MoreRocked His World
Posted on 12/15/2021
Hello. My husband and I have two kids, one 20-month old boy and one 2-month old girl. The younger one is an easy baby and the older one likes his baby sister (exhibited by kissing her all the...
Read MoreWhat to do when he says, "no"
Posted on 12/10/2021
Our third son is turning 3 in about a week. He has started saying "no" when we tell him to do something, and then runs away when we try to discipline him. We have been resorting to spanking...
Read MoreI am Woman, Hear Me Roar---Even Though I'm Only 4!
Posted on 12/7/2021
I am at my wits end. I am doing my best to do the ticket system with my children. My 4 year old daughter has maybe made it 1 day, at least until bedtime, without losing all of her tickets since we...
Read MoreClarifying the Garden Kick
Posted on 12/4/2021
Does kicking out of the garden mean the child is confined to their new boring room for the duration of the time? Do you restrict them from playing outside with sibblings or friends? Can they...
Read MoreLeave Christmas Alone
Posted on 11/27/2021
Currently my daughter has lost all her toys until her behavior improves. If she hasn’t changed her behavior by Christmas, is it wrong not to allow her to open presents on Christmas Day but require...
Read MoreAwakened Mom Wants Respectful 8 year old Son
Posted on 11/24/2021
I have a 7, almost 8 year old son, who has not ever been appropriately disciplined and has developed into a challenging and, dare I say, entitled child. He has little respect for me and when I...
Read More8-Year-Old Ruling the Roost (Follow-up)
Posted on 11/24/2021
Okay in regards to my prior question. I purchased the book. Thank you. Can you please tell me some examples of what you mean right now so I can start turning the tables ASAP! Instead of...
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