"In the eyes of a child, parents are "mean" when the child discovers that they mean what they say. "

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Exhausted Mom of 11-Year-Old Needs Help

Posted 1 week ago

I am a mother of an 11yr old daughter. I am a wife and caregiver to a disabled Veteran with mental and physical health problems. My faith is the only thing keeping me going right now. I am having...

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How To Apply Discipline Techniques While Not at Home

Posted 1 week ago

We are putting into practice a number of parenting techniques mentioned on this site. And overall things are working well when we are in the home. How do I use the "three strikes" method with...

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3D Snapshot of the Mien of a Tween: not a Pretty Picture

Posted on 9/23/2020

My 12 year old son is stealing money out of my purse. He has a long history of defiance, sneakiness, and lying. He is also disrespectful, and disobedient. We suspect he's been stealing money for...

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Disrespectful 8-Year-Old

Posted on 9/19/2020

We have noticed more ungrateful and entitled behavior in my 8 year old son recently. During a trip to the zoo, he became upset and was rude and disrespectful when I would not buy him food and ice...

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How to Deal With a 5-Year-Old Who Hits

Posted on 9/17/2020

Our son is 5 and just started kindergarten. He's had so many tough transitions this year with COVID lockdowns. One day in March his friends, preschool, extended family were all taken away and then...

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4-Year-Old Acts Out when Reprimanded

Posted on 7/22/2020

Our four year old uses her "animal brain" more often than I would expect. She loses control and acts out when she is reprimanded. We don't want to spank for every act of disobedience. When is...

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Nipping his misbehavior in the Bud

Posted on 7/19/2020

Our 18 month old has gone from being an easy to child to a handful. All of his behavior seems normal, but more extreme than our older boys. He also seems unresponsive to correction. Some of these...

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6 YO Girl Behaving Inappropriately with Friends and Lying About It

Posted on 6/2/2020

Private parts My 6 year old daughter and her friend, a boy have gotten in to trouble lately, because they keep trying to sneak off and pee in front of each other. I’m concerned because they...

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Disrespectful Tween

Posted on 5/22/2020

My 11 year old daughter gets upset when I correct her and calls me names in her heart not aloud; but she later tells me those rude things and apologises. (The most recent name she called me...

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Conquering a Three-Year Old Quarantine Quagmire

Posted on 5/5/2020

my son is 3 yr and 3 month old,he was very careful and neat. recently he started to get very aggressive especially during the quarantine in the house. He has been staying home for a month now. He...

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Hurricane Behavior in Toddler

Posted on 4/27/2020

Our almost three year old daughter can be very defiant and disrespectful. When she wants something, she wants it right away. She will ask repeatedly for something even when we tell her no. She is...

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Oh, Those Rebellious Threes!

Posted on 4/19/2020

Hello, my son just turned three two weeks ago. Almost the same time that his behaviors started to escalate with screaming, saying no when instructed to do things, and just outright rebellious. I...

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Misbehavior list increases

Posted on 4/14/2020

Please help! Our almost 5-year old daughter behaves terribly and we do not know where to start. We read the book Well-behaved Child but we also need individual consultation with you. A little...

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Pre-Teen: A Lingering Fever

Posted on 3/24/2020

We are having some trouble with our 12 year old son. I can see how things have progressed and how we haven't quite followed the Rosemond plan. He is very rude with his sisters, he talks back a lot...

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Take Charge of Bedtime Shenanigans

Posted on 3/12/2020

Feeling frustrated. I have a 6 year old, and 2 year old. They are hanging up on me! For example- I say it’s time for bed, and I tell them to come brush their teeth, the older one starts to...

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Give the Kid a Choice

Posted on 3/3/2020

We have a 35 month old son who is very loving, yet VERY strong-willed. I have read your book, and we have tried to implement the strategies recommended, but we find he is so defiant we would be...

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Spiraling Seven Year Old

Posted on 3/2/2020

I would like some advice on how to handle our 7 year old son. Our family has had an extremely tough season. We had to re-home the dog my children grew up with (my sons best buddy) due to my sons...

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The Terrible Twos Part II: The Teen Years

Posted on 2/27/2020

my daughter is 14 years old and she thinks she is crazy in love for a boy in her school , same grade. She doesn't have a smart phone . But she bought an old phone from a friend for 80 dollars and...

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Pre- teen sent to principal's office

Posted on 2/19/2020

My 11 y/o daughter was just sent to the principal's office for carving a middle finger out of an eraser and saying that it represented her teacher. Princial said that she and other kids are...

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10 Year Old Testing Boundaries

Posted on 2/8/2020

I have been using the alpha speech. I make mistakes sometimes, escalating my voice because I'm frustrated. On the most part I'm pretty consistent. I noticed in alpha speech you do no use...

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Ball is in the Parent's Court

Posted on 1/31/2020

Hello, My son, who is 5 years old has a strong will and constantly gets in trouble at TK for bad behavior. Since infancy it was hard to deal with him, because he would refuse to obey. I tried to...

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Lower the Boom on School Misbehavior

Posted on 1/22/2020

Our seven year old got sent to the principles office today for telling another student "I'm going to kill you". He was already one night into a three night bout of being banished to his room due...

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Little Victories

Posted on 1/16/2020

Not a question; more of a comment of thanks. I started the Ticket Method (at home for both home and school behaviors) a week ago and today my son's teacher (1st grade) sent me an email stating...

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Toddler ignores grandma.

Posted on 1/14/2020

Lately my 2 year old has moments where he is very rude to my mom (his grandma) who helps with childcare. He blatantly ignores her or tells her no or that he doesn't want to do x, y or z. My...

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Stay the Course.

Posted on 1/14/2020

I used N75 with my first child and it was a snap. At 22 months she was without accidents within a few days. My second child was 22 months before the holidays. With traveling etc. etc. we...

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Time for a Reset

Posted on 1/12/2020

Clarification to my follow up question: When you say impose consequences... often my consequences are extra chores. I do not know what else to offer as a consequence. They're too young to take...

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6 and 9 Year Olds Won’t Do Chores

Posted on 1/12/2020

Follow up question: After reviewing chapter 3, i do believe I was using the ticket system properly... my targets were 1. Not doing as told 2. Lying 3. Talking back. The targets were the same...

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Alpha Speech is Key for Getting Kids to Obey

Posted on 1/10/2020

I have 2 girls, 9 & 6. They will not obey. They’ll lie that they did something and I have to verify completion or it’s never done. I used the ticket system and I had to take away every privilege...

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Alpha Speech is Key to Parental Leadership

Posted on 1/9/2020

Hello. Our daughter just turned 5. She has started to argue, history, say she didn’t hear, that she forgot and any number of excuses when she has disobeyed us. If we ask her to go put her toy...

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Argumentative two and a half year old

Posted on 12/14/2019

Our two and a half year old daughter is argumentative. There will be times when we’ve told her to do something in a clear manner and she will outright say “No, I will not do...” (fill in the...

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Mouthy Teens Ups the Vitriol

Posted on 12/9/2019

Okay, I’ve had this subscription for years now and have yet to write in with a question, as many, and as urgent, as I’ve felt they have been in previous years. So I hope you’ll give me a little...

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Relationship Reboot

Posted on 12/9/2019

This is a Part II to an early question submitted about a very strong-willed and increasingly mouthy 16-year old daughter. Please bear with someone who has subscribed for YEARS without submitting...

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Argumentative 10-Year-Old Needs a Reality Check

Posted on 11/26/2019

Argumentative 10 year old- May daughter is pushing back on everything. When told to do something (anything) she grumbles, sighs, complains, etc. My husband and I have been working on "yes mom,...

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Rebellious 25 monts old

Posted on 11/23/2019

Hi My 25 month old daughter is potty trained now. I started when she was 23 month old, and 3 weeks ago until she got completely trained even at night. since yesterday she has been having pee...

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Reservations about Resetting the Dial

Posted on 11/21/2019

This question is for Sharon Lamberth: Thank you very much for your thoughtful reply regarding my family's discipline situation. I agree that my husband and I need to do the things you suggested,...

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Managing Misbehavior on Vacation

Posted on 11/16/2019

After a long string of troubling incidents involving our 7yr old (soon to be 8) son, we decided to try John's "kicking out of the garden" strategy. We are going on vacation (gone 9 days) next...

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Toddler Tests the Limits

Posted on 11/13/2019

My son is 11 months old today. When I tell him not to touch something, he will almost immediately touch the item. When he does, i remove the item from his hand and tell him that he is not allowed...

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Being in charge means...

Posted on 11/9/2019

How do you recommend dealing with whining and bad attitudes? We we using the ticket system with our 5 year old and it is helping with bigger bad behaviors. We are working to use Alpha speech and...

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When Normal Becomes a Disorder

Posted on 11/6/2019

My son is six years old, and he started kindergarten this year. Somewhere around week three or four, I got a call from his teacher stating that he has "impulsivity issues". I did a quick google...

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4-Year-Old Running the Show

Posted on 10/31/2019

What if our 4 year old refuses to stay in his room after he loses his 5 tickets?

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A Tale of the Terrible Twos

Posted on 10/27/2019

What is the appropriate response when a toddler misbehaves while you're in the middle of an activity you cannot just walk away from to redirect or deter them immediately? Here are a few...

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Train Him Up

Posted on 10/24/2019

How do you deal with a 4 year old that when he is told “no” or asked to do something he does not want to do, ends up doing that specific thing or has a tantrum to some degree or another. How do...

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Resetting The Dial Can Be Best Bet

Posted on 10/21/2019

What are the suggested number of target behaviors and daily tickets for children of the following ages: 1) boy age 5 - generally a low-misbehaver, main problem is tantrums, sometimes disobeys or...

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Tickets for 3 year olds?

Posted on 10/17/2019

We started the ticket system with our three and 5 year old boys about two months ago. I feel like our 3 year old may be too young for it. The afternoons are particularly rough because he has...

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Be the Alpha Female

Posted on 10/10/2019

Our 5 yo son is very well-behaved at school (he just started kindergarten 6 weeks ago) but his behavior has worsened by extremes at home. Especially at bedtime, if I don't snuggle him in his bed...

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Teach Tweenager How to Manage Anger

Posted on 10/8/2019

Hi There, My daughter will be 11 yo on February, she is such a sweet/sensetive girl who likes to please others, but when she becomes angry she can not control it , she melts down for a while then...

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