"To be an effective disciplinarian, you must be a model of self-discipline. "

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Disrespectful 8-Year-Old

Posted on 9/19/2020

We have noticed more ungrateful and entitled behavior in my 8 year old son recently. During a trip to the zoo, he became upset and was rude and disrespectful when I would not buy him food and ice...

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Tween Not Playing By the Rules

Posted on 8/10/2020

I have sent in a request for a coach, as you can see I have been having a difficult time with my 13 year old. I just experienced a tantrum again, it’s nightly for about a week now, how he is still...

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Backtalking 8-Year-Old

Posted on 8/10/2020

I have a question about the ticket system. We are using tickets to focus on talking back from our 8 year old. Often when he loses a ticket for talking back, he continues as he makes his way to...

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Cutting the Mealtime Cord

Posted on 7/18/2020

Hello! Our second and youngest daughter is going on three in a month. I am wondering about realistic expectations at the dinner table for her; especially if she is able to eat herself and can...

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Big Sister 11 wants some space from 8 year old brother

Posted on 6/24/2020

Thank you so much for the thoughtful and helpful ways you've equipped me as a parent since signing up to this site. I've come to understand that I should let my kids resolve issues they have with...

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Misbehavior list increases

Posted on 4/14/2020

Please help! Our almost 5-year old daughter behaves terribly and we do not know where to start. We read the book Well-behaved Child but we also need individual consultation with you. A little...

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Helping Kids Develop Good Habits Without Nagging

Posted on 4/14/2020

My 7 year old has a habit of leaving lights on when he leaves the room, leaving the toilet seat up, not flushing the toilet chain, leaving rubbish out, not putting his laundry in basket etc. How...

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When 'Because I Said So' Isn't Working

Posted on 2/9/2020

I have the audible version of Parenting by the Book, which I love & has been very helpful. In one part of the book Dr. Rosemond gives a few simple explanations that are ok to give to children,...

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10 Year Old Testing Boundaries

Posted on 2/8/2020

I have been using the alpha speech. I make mistakes sometimes, escalating my voice because I'm frustrated. On the most part I'm pretty consistent. I noticed in alpha speech you do no use...

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"Note to self"

Posted on 1/31/2020

I recently showed my 3 year old daughter a video of me nursing her when she was a baby. What I thought would be a sweet moment of her watching herself bonding with me as a baby didn't exactly...

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How to Tame the Whining

Posted on 1/29/2020

My 5-year-old has regressed with his whining. His baby brother is going through his terrible 2’s, and I’m not sure if he’s trying to copy that behavior. I am presently trying to send him to his...

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8 Year Old Loves to Argue with Mom

Posted on 1/21/2020

My almost 8 year old boy has become quite skilled at arguing. In addition to arguing things that are easily proven false, he also contradicts you in casual conversation. I'm not sure if it's just...

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Stay the Course.

Posted on 1/14/2020

I used N75 with my first child and it was a snap. At 22 months she was without accidents within a few days. My second child was 22 months before the holidays. With traveling etc. etc. we...

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4 Year Old Biting Must Stop

Posted on 1/13/2020

Our 4 year old son's teacher called home today after school to tell us that he got into an argument with a peer over a toy. While pulling back and forth for the toy, our son bit the other child....

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Time for a Reset

Posted on 1/12/2020

Clarification to my follow up question: When you say impose consequences... often my consequences are extra chores. I do not know what else to offer as a consequence. They're too young to take...

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6 and 9 Year Olds Won’t Do Chores

Posted on 1/12/2020

Follow up question: After reviewing chapter 3, i do believe I was using the ticket system properly... my targets were 1. Not doing as told 2. Lying 3. Talking back. The targets were the same...

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Alpha Speech is Key for Getting Kids to Obey

Posted on 1/10/2020

I have 2 girls, 9 & 6. They will not obey. They’ll lie that they did something and I have to verify completion or it’s never done. I used the ticket system and I had to take away every privilege...

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Is Child's Threat of Suicide a Cry for Help or for Attention?

Posted on 1/9/2020

My oldest is eleven and started middle school this year. Overall it has been a smooth transition. She has a great group of friends and likes school. She does not have a phone and has very limited...

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Relationship Reboot

Posted on 12/9/2019

This is a Part II to an early question submitted about a very strong-willed and increasingly mouthy 16-year old daughter. Please bear with someone who has subscribed for YEARS without submitting...

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Argumentative 10-Year-Old Needs a Reality Check

Posted on 11/26/2019

Argumentative 10 year old- May daughter is pushing back on everything. When told to do something (anything) she grumbles, sighs, complains, etc. My husband and I have been working on "yes mom,...

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Teach Tweenager How to Manage Anger

Posted on 10/8/2019

Hi There, My daughter will be 11 yo on February, she is such a sweet/sensetive girl who likes to please others, but when she becomes angry she can not control it , she melts down for a while then...

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Dinner Time Battle of the Wills

Posted on 9/16/2019

My 3 year old daughter has developed a bad habit at dinner time. Although she’s usually pretty good to try new foods, every now and then she will - for some unknown reason - hold a bite of food in...

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When Food Issues Become Power Struggles

Posted on 9/5/2019

I asked a question about my 8 year old sneaking sweets - we have since carried out your suggestions - but it is not working. She looks for other ways to get sweets. We allowed her to buy some cup...

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8 yro needs to learn to give some R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Posted on 7/11/2019

I have 3 sons: 4,6,8. My oldest has been a challenge for us. He does well academically. There are some requests at school to have him listen or think through questions before asking. But these...

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Hop off the Argument Merry Go Round

Posted on 5/5/2019

Hi there, My almost 5-year-old has come a long way from his 3-year-old self. I suppose maturity helps. He's no longer throwing tantrums (a.k.a crying loudly) or hitting when he doesn't get his...

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5 year old loves/hates martial arts class

Posted on 3/23/2019

My 5.5 year old son gets really angry before going to his martial arts class, which he loves. In the past 2 weeks he has thrown huge fits, soaked his uniform in the sink (he had to go to class...

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Battle Weary

Posted on 3/21/2019

I have 18 month old twins, a boy and a girl. They haven't yet developed verbal skills; they don't recognize "no", or even their own names. I've been told that this is common among twins at this...

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Picky picky picky!

Posted on 2/22/2019

My two year old grandson will only eat yogurt and cheese at my house and is picky at his grandad's as well. He does drink milk and juice. If I put out fruit or other foods, he won't even try...

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The Terrible 12's

Posted on 2/7/2019

A few months have passed. This school year seems to have been a big step for my now 12 year old. We have been struggling most of the school year and just got his grades for the second quarter. The...

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Hitting plus tantrums

Posted on 2/5/2019

HI there, we've been intensively working with our now 4.5 year old boy who had many, many behavioural problems. He is now much more cooperative after sessions with a good parent coach. However,...

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Kicked out of the Garden

Posted on 2/2/2019

My 9 yo daughter was kicked out of the garden a few days ago due to disobedience. By 10:00 this morning, she had lost all of the blocks on her behavior chart and was sent to her room for the rest...

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The Defiant Young Adult

Posted on 1/31/2019

My son turns 18 tomorrow. He seems to think this means he can do whatever he wants, including not doing what I ask. He is picking his girlfriend up at the airport this evening and I told him he...

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Emancipation is never easy

Posted on 12/29/2018

I am divorced and remarried for 16 years. My ex cheated on me multiple times. Since our divorce which was a 3rd marriage he has been married 3x since. His most recent wife is 30 years his jr and a...

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11 year old not paying attention to parents

Posted on 12/6/2018

I just reviewed a questions from another subscriber using a ticket system with a 7 year old to nip multiple behaviors in the bud. In the answer I read "You cannot disciple or discipline a child...

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Out of Control 7yr old

Posted on 10/27/2018

Hi, my husband and I would appreciate some advice on our situation with our 7 year old daughter. Her medication has become ineffective recently and we are at our wits end with what to do with...

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The High School Experiment

Posted on 10/22/2018

I feel like I ask the same questions all the time. My 12th grader is stressing me out, he is barely making his grades in school coming in at B, C, D's and E's. He's a good kid but I suspect...

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Strive

Posted on 9/26/2018

My step-daughter 14 has been telling her mom and dad on and off for years that she does not feel part of our household and wants to stay at her mom's house. This conversation usually starts up...

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Getting a 4 and 6 yr old help get ready for school bus

Posted on 9/24/2018

This year my 4 year old has joined my 6 year old in the morning school routine, as she is in 4K and the other in 1st grade. They take the bus to school together and they have a list of things to...

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4 YO Boy Says He is a Girl

Posted on 8/29/2018

Our 4 year old son has recently been saying he is a girl. This began shortly after watching several episodes of Dora the Explorer. All of his siblings are older and don’t live at home. He is...

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taking back authority over 7yo

Posted on 8/12/2018

I recently discovered Mr. Rosemond's books. My husband and I are now implementing his ideas with our 7 year old son who gets easily frustrated when he doesn't get his way, ignores our demands,...

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Preschooler with an Attitude

Posted on 8/8/2018

Our 4, almost 5 year old has developed a very strong attitude problem lately. Everything that my husband or I tell her turns into her talking back. We have always told her “because I said so,” but...

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Stay in Bed!

Posted on 7/30/2018

We are having issues getting our almost 3 year old to go to sleep and stay in his room at nap time and bedtime. He recently transitioned out of a crib b/c he could climb out and now he comes out...

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Reining in Mouthy Eleven Year Old

Posted on 7/9/2018

Hello, John and coaches, I really need help with my eleven year old. She just is so mentally exhausting to me and my husband. She is extremely strong willed and argues everything with me. I am...

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Teen Awakening

Posted on 6/19/2018

Hi--I am hoping John will answer this question--I reread Teen Proofing, and you talk about kids experimenting/using drugs can be a great opportunity for you and for them--for them to make mistakes...

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The Terrible Three's

Posted on 6/15/2018

My 33 month old has recently begun yelling all of his responses. He gets frustrated very easily and says, “Stop! Stop it, mommy!” and “Goooosh!” "No!" is his favorite word, and now he yells it....

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Husband files for divorce after wife takes a stand with teens.

Posted on 6/1/2018

Dear John Rosemond, I wrote in a while ago on putting the marriage first. I was never able to get my husband on board which indeed caused a great deal of strife in our family, especially with...

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