Posted on 7/30/2021
My stepsons are 12 and 14. We also have a 4 and 2 year old. Their mother has been generally uncooperative and at times hostile to us, and treats the boys very differently. She doesn’t seem to like...
Read MorePosted on 1/15/2021
I just pulled an old John article out of my drawer that I have had for years. It was about how therapy can be detrimental to a child and rarely works. Also talked about kids emotions and feelings...
Read MorePosted on 12/22/2020
My 7 year old step son developed a fear of his younger siblings approaching him. After his appointment (he went with his mom at) about his chapped lips that have been bothering him for a while now...
Read MorePosted on 3/29/2020
My 7 year old son has picked up on some terrible slang while with his father. Everything is “banging mate” as one example. It sounds horrendous. How do I stop this?
Read MorePosted on 1/16/2020
Hi, I have written before regarding my stepson. He is 24 years old, has a college degree and lives at home with his mother. He has been diagnosed with interstitial cystitis, a chronic condition...
Read MorePosted on 9/5/2019
Hi, I am having trouble dealing with my step daughter that is 15. My husband and I have 5 children together. He has two and I have three. My husbands daughter has severe anger and behavioral...
Read MorePosted on 4/14/2019
I am a step grandparent. We have a three year old grandson who is being raised in a progressive, liberal, agnostic environment. The household is run by the toddler and to say it is matriarch ruled...
Read MorePosted on 3/11/2019
Hello, My stepson in 23 and a recent college graduate with a communication degree. His father and I have been married 2 years. His parents are concerned about his seemingly lack of motivation to...
Read MorePosted on 1/21/2019
Just wondering if you feel that all children in a step family should be treated the same, as far as, rules, quality time etc? My husband feels that since his children only have visitation with us...
Read MorePosted on 12/22/2018
I am apart of a step family. I am having trouble with my step children not accepting me. I feel like this is highly due to how their mother feels about me even though she wanted the divorce she...
Read MorePosted on 10/19/2018
My husband and I follow your columns (my mother quoted you regularly growing up, sometimes to our dismay) but now as a stepmother and father to a teenage boy, we find ourselves in a tough spot. We...
Read MorePosted on 9/26/2018
My step-daughter 14 has been telling her mom and dad on and off for years that she does not feel part of our household and wants to stay at her mom's house. This conversation usually starts up...
Read MorePosted on 9/17/2018
I have a question re. how to handle my son's awful behavior. He is 14 years old. His Father and I switched custody 6 months ago through mediation, following a lawsuit that my son requested because...
Read MorePosted on 9/10/2018
HI, My husband and I have been married 2 years. I have 2 boys, 15 and 17, who live with us half the time. He has 2 boys, 23 and 20, who are rarely at our house because they are in college. All 4...
Read MorePosted on 8/3/2018
My 4 year old Grandson who has always lived with me seems to be having some new concerns regarding his Mom. His Mom, has not seen him since Christmas Day, and has not contacted me to do so. Yes,...
Read MorePosted on 6/4/2018
My husband and 19 year old son seem to have absolutely no relationship. (My husband adopted my kids) I’ve been urging them for years to go do stuff together, whatever. 2 weeks ago, our counselor...
Read MorePosted on 4/19/2018
I have 2 step-daughters, ages 11 and 8, who spend half of their time with us and half with their mom. We don’t allow them to use any form of social media and have explained to them the dangers....
Read MorePosted on 4/13/2018
How do I introduce a half sister to a three year old child? He does not understand that Jj (father of both children) is even his Dad. Jj is not present in his life nor the sister's life. The...
Read MorePosted on 3/21/2018
My son Carter is 13 and in 7th grade, he is suffering from anxiety and depression. I have recently gotten married, one year ago this month, and my husband has 3 other children (16 boy, 12 boy,...
Read MorePosted on 3/1/2018
My husbands 15 yo daughter has cut off all communication with him. She was living with us but moved to her moms full time for the past year and a half, he has been blocked from texting, messaging,...
Read MorePosted on 1/8/2018
Good day, we have tried lots of different things,this is the way she is now, alway angry, I dont know what to do except her bio dad to be with her now. What would be your recommendation for me, in...
Read MorePosted on 12/3/2017
I have been divorced almost 6 years and the only man I have ever dated has asked me to marry him. We have been dating 3.5 years and each have two children, ages 9 and 12. My 12 yo is really...
Read MorePosted on 11/9/2017
Should there be consequences if my 13 year old step-daughter refuses to do her chores (clean up her room and door her laundry), leaves notes on her door telling me/us to STFO, refuses to eat when...
Read MorePosted on 10/19/2017
I have 8 & 10 year old stepsons and a 3 month old. When the baby was first born, the kids stayed with their mother for about a month before slowly resuming split custody. Before they returned to...
Read MorePosted on 8/21/2017
Our soon to be 4 grandson now has a parenting contract between our son and the child's mother. They were never married. The contract was made by the biological mother and my son's new wife, who...
Read MorePosted on 4/27/2017
I have 3 step daughters ages 10, 13, and 15. I never have had a sister but my nieces are close in age and the best of friends. My daughters won't share and are so mean to each other. Attitudes,...
Read MorePosted on 4/25/2017
This is in reference to my last question regarding my 14 year old stepson. I couldn't agree more about the parents being on the same page. Plus I have read Johns" book Teen proofing. I have...
Read MorePosted on 4/23/2017
On 4/19/17 I asked a question about my 18 year old step son saying he would hit me. I also said that my husband stated he would divorce me if I called the police on the boy if he does hit me. I...
Read MorePosted on 4/19/2017
My husband and I have been married for nine years. We both had three children. My question is how to handle discipline when only half if the children have to follow the family rules. I love my...
Read MorePosted on 2/5/2017
This question is in reference to the October 2016 question regarding my 13 year old's act of vandalism. Fast forward 8 months later. He has completed his punishment, but not without having to...
Read MorePosted on 12/16/2016
I recently married my husband and became the stepmom of 7 & 9 year old boys. My husband was full time military and deployed/stationed in another state most of their lives and returned to 50%...
Read MorePosted on 12/9/2016
I have been dating my boyfriend for almost 2 years. His kids have been really accepting of me but they also have issues with their mother being a "good mother". My son hasn't been so...
Read MorePosted on 12/8/2016
Do parenting rules change when parenting a young adult (19) with a chronic/terminal illness. My husband's son (and 16 yr old daughter) have cystic fibrosis. While their health is generally good...
Read MorePosted on 11/26/2016
My stepdaughter, Mary, and her 7 1/2 year old granddaughter, Ann, moved in with us in NY since her husband is an alcoholic and in rehab in CA. She finally landed a good job here in her...
Read MorePosted on 11/14/2016
Divorced about 3 years. Dating my boyfriend for 1 1/2years. I haven't push the relationship Ive given my 13 year old boy space. He doesn't like my boyfriends daughters. My moms bd was last...
Read MorePosted on 11/9/2016
Hi! We are a blended family. My husband and I both have custody of our children. What can parents do to encourage a good relationship between their children and their spouse (the children's...
Read MorePosted on 11/5/2016
We are retirement age. I already have and my husband plans to soon. It is a blended family. My husband's daughter continues to make poor choices and knows her dad will pay for everything. He...
Read MorePosted on 8/12/2016
I read your response titled "Stepfathers Must Have Complete Disciplinary Discretion." Do you feel that stepparents must have disciplinary authority where the stepparent joins the family when the...
Read MorePosted on 8/1/2016
My husband has two boys, ages 12 and 4. The oldest lives only with his father and I, the youngest goes back and forth between us and his mother. My husband is a wonderful husband and a good...
Read MorePosted on 4/12/2016
Recently, 3 of my 4 children participated in a "game" with their 18-year-old soon-to-be step-brother. The "game" consisted of binding the hands of the children, 1-male (8) and 2-females (6 & 5),...
Read MorePosted on 4/5/2016
We are a struggling blended family. My husband has 3 children (ages 7, 12, 17) from a previous marriage. They would most likely still be married if they saw eye to eye on how life/children...
Read MorePosted on 12/17/2015
I have a 5 year old stepson. My husband and I really try to limit the number of new toys he gets. Including gifts from family, he gets a handful of new toys at the holidays and for his birthday....
Read MorePosted on 11/17/2015
My 14 year old step-daughter is incredibly rude and disrespectful of her father and I. She comes to our house every other week after a week of being indulged by her mother, and demands that we...
Read MorePosted on 10/24/2015
My 11 year old son has a terrible temper and disrespects me and my husband (his step-dad). He calls others names when he gets mad and says hurtful things. His own dad is more permissive (and where...
Read MorePosted on 7/23/2015
My husband and stepdaughter (15) had an argument. She lives with us full time but violated a rule, was called out on it and she escalated with (what she thought) were hurtful statements. One of...
Read MorePosted on 7/7/2015
My youngest stepson informed me that his mother & stepfather told him that the child support they pay us is to go into the boys savings accounts, that "we are taking it from them by keeping it...
Read MorePosted on 7/2/2015
As to your answer to my previous question, it isn't relevant since we never get to have our grandson at our home for a visit. He tattles on us right in front of us at his home. Any indiscretion is...
Read MorePosted on 6/16/2015
I have a very bright 7-year old step-grandson, "Jake," whose parents have been divorced since he was 2. After every visitation with his dad, his mom grills him to determine whether her ex has done...
Read MorePosted on 5/12/2015
To Dinah - Replying to your response: my daughter is 12!! While 14 and 16 are fine ages to enhance their faces, a 12 year old who is immature and encouraged by biomom to look sexy isn't the...
Read MorePosted on 5/7/2015
We are blending a family with three children ages 9,11, and 12. The 9 and 11 year old are siblings (a boy and a girl). The 11 and 12 year olds are boys. The boys often do not get along and we...
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