Questions

Ditch the "Smart" Phones

Posted 3 days ago

Hello, After coming in contact with your blog, I (dad) am trying to be more macro manager and not micro with my two girls, ages 13 and 11. They have iPhones. Should I be setting a screen time...

"PERSNIKETY" 32 MONTH OLD RUNS THE HOUSE

Posted 5 days ago

We have a very particular 32 month old. We've followed John's teachings for our other two from toddlerhood but this kid has us scratching our heads. This child of ours had a rough start to life;...

Adoption questions

Posted 1 week ago

We have adopted 2 sons. They are 5 and 3 years old, and they came to us as babies (6 months and 3 1/2 months). They have never had any family member visits, or anyone in their lives other than my...

Working on one behavior at a time.

Posted 1 week ago

4 yr old aggressive son, next question: turns out I have come to realise I am enabling bad behavior by being a pushover of a mother. I need to sort out his behaviour, and my responses to it,...

Five Years Old: The Age of Fine Whine

Posted 1 week ago

My youngest, who is 5 years old, is feeling left out, saying the neighborhood kids don’t want to play with him. However, I don’t blame them! He is very whiny, tattles constantly, and doesn't share...

POST-DIVORCE PARENTING ISSUES

Posted 1 week ago

Some allegations that my daughter made about me to her school counselor and obviously and the allegations that were given to me in the report it states that my children’s father was coaching them....

Aggressive 4-Year-Old Boy

Posted 2 weeks ago

My 4 yr old is aggressive, the gentle parenting we have been sold isn't working for this. I have just read your work and as of yestersday have been confining my son to his room if he hits/is...

To Share or Not to Share - That is the Question

Posted 2 weeks ago

What are the pros and cons for sibling room sharing? I wonder if I should make my 11 month old share a room with the 2.5 year old. P.S. The 2.5 year old is completely potty trained. Thanks for...

Need more banger Info please!

Posted 2 weeks ago

We read the Q&A on "10 month boy bangs head" which is exactly what our son does except he's now 18 months old and has been doing it for so long he literally has a unicorn bump growing on his head....

Call me they.

Posted on 9/3/2022

Two of my daughters, one jr. high the other a freshman declared they want to be addressed as they. This has taken me by surprise as I am close to my children. We monitor what they watch or read...

Mentally Drained Mom Seeking Advice

Posted on 9/2/2022

We have a 9 year old girl, 6 year old boy, and 4.5 year old girl. I've read Parenting by The Book twice and The Well Behaved Child twice in the past month. Our 9 year old is the biggest challenge,...

Raising Believers

Posted on 8/30/2022

We just started the ticket system and we have one target misbehavior for our 4 year old. Following directions. For example, when he loses a ticket because he doesn’t listen when we ask him to...

The Compass Points South: A 15-Year-Old’s Craving for Independence

Posted on 8/29/2022

I have a 15 year old daughter that I used to call my "compass" as she was such an easy child to raise. But, the last 2 years have been difficult. Now, I haven't spoken to her for 3 days because I...

7 year old and The Ticket to Controlling Their Own Behavior

Posted on 8/25/2022

My 7 yr. old daugher is the youngest of (2) kids, and her anger at home has a short fuse. Every time our 9 yr. old son engages her (as siblings do), she explodes and starts hitting and screaming...

GRANDPARENT TRAVAILS REDUX

Posted on 8/23/2022

John, Hi, my sons are grown now, enjoyed your columns, WE have 1 grandson . His Dad, my son, was spoiled so it seems to be continuing unfortunately. Question: now that Roman is 3, doesn't...

Two-Year-Old Burning Out Mom

Posted on 8/23/2022

I live every day in a blind rage. My 2 1/2 year old is exasperating, infuriating, demanding, interrupts continuously and I can not get a SINGLE task completed (can not stress enough). She talks...

Deciding how to grandparent.

Posted on 8/21/2022

Our grandson, turned 3, is starting to be a brat. Our son and daughter in law don't correct him. Daughter in law talks to him and never gets to the point. He doesn't go to bed at a regular...

Two-Year-Old’s Love for Tantrums

Posted on 8/17/2022

My 2 year old son loves to throw a good tantrum when we leave an activity that he was previously enjoying. The tantrum does not usually set in until we try to strap him into his car seat, however....

Step-parent woes

Posted on 8/17/2022

Hi, I'm a step-dad to two girls 16 and 13. I have a daughter of my own 14. I'm having a difficult time with Perspective regarding raising teenagers as I have no clue. I like people to do...

10 YO BOY VIEWING PORN...I WONDER WHERE?

Posted on 8/17/2022

Our ten year old was caught looking at porn on his friend phone. yesterday. he also was caught on his school computer, last year. we tried to explain to him how wrong it was and took away all his...

2 YEAR OLD TOO STRONG FOR MOM

Posted on 8/16/2022

We have a 2-year-old that refuses to listen and his favorite answer is no. For example, just this morning I was trying to get him ready to go to daycare and I asked him to sit down so I could...

Time to Reel In 5-Year-Old

Posted on 8/16/2022

We have a 5 year old who has come a long way with behavior but lately hasn't been great at listening when told to do something. She will almost pretend we didn't say it or will just say "I will in...

Sometimes all you need is a hug and a dutch door.

Posted on 8/13/2022

When my 4 year old son loses all his privileges for the day, we cannot get him to stay in his room. What is something we can try? We calmly put him back in his room each time he runs out, but it...

Enforcement is difficult.

Posted on 8/11/2022

My son is 12 years old and has been confined to his bedroom for the past month and a half for getting F’s in school. My husband thought he was acting suspicious so he peeked in his window and...

KARL MARX HAD IT RIGHT!

Posted on 8/10/2022

It was the first day of school today for my 11-year-old (5th grade) and 8 year-old (3rd grade). An exciting day for all involved. My 11-year-old girl came home from school today and I asked how...

Keeping Kids off Friends' Electronic Devices

Posted on 8/8/2022

We live in an HOA community with small backyards, so we can't tell our boys to play in the backyard all day though we have a trampoline. Instead, we hoped that our kids would play with the...

Toilet Training Takes Time

Posted on 8/1/2022

Hello, we started potty training our 18-month-old nine days ago and have had little progress. I've read John's book on toilet training, and I feel like we're doing all he recommends but think we...

Toilet Training Guidance

Posted on 7/30/2022

My son is 17 months and I’ve been trying to toilet train him for 6 days using the “naked and $75” technique outlined in the “Toilet Training Without Tantrums” book. I have yet to see notable...

FAMILY CONFLICT OVER DRINKING AND POT

Posted on 7/28/2022

As a kid, my dad & older brothers drank. My mom didn't, but allowed it. I started drinking at 17. My brothers smoke marijuana.I quit drinking at 28. I will occ. have a glass of wine, but not...

Toilet Training Takes Time

Posted on 7/27/2022

Hello, we started potty training our 17 1/2 month old 9 days ago. Some progress but not much, we ask where pee pee and poopoo go and she points to the potty. She seems to go into a corner, but not...

Get Creative

Posted on 7/24/2022

Greetings! Our usually cheerful and happy 4yo daughter does not seem to react normally to punishment. At first she gets upset and cries, but very shortly into a time out or being sent to her room...

3.5-Year-Old Pulling Mom's Chain

Posted on 7/24/2022

The card system is working for the 3.5 year old and he is (begrudgingly) becoming obedient! However, he will not perform for me! He swims for his swim coach, but freaks out and demands to be put...

Toddler Bedtime Routine

Posted on 7/21/2022

I need help with our sleeping situation. My two year old currently sleeps in a crib for his nap, which is very easy since I just put him down and he falls asleep on his own. For bedtime he sleeps...

"Boxers on the Noggin'": The Silliness of a Boy--and his Disobedience

Posted on 7/19/2022

This is regarding the card system. The rules we initially established are: no hitting/kicking, no throwing and do what mom and dad say. So, sometimes we will be getting dressed and he’s being...

Nighttime Woes Wearing Mom Down

Posted on 7/18/2022

How can I best use tickets or charts for my daughter (just turned 7) when she's having the majority of her behavior issues at bedtime? She's pretty good throughout the day though there are...

Middle of the Night Potty Solution

Posted on 7/16/2022

My 3.5 year old has been potty trained since before he was 2. I read and generally used the Rosemond book. However, I didn’t do the night/nap training as my pediatrician said it was just...

Monster Madness

Posted on 7/13/2022

My daughter is 2.5 year old and randomly started telling us there are monsters (under bed, under couch, etc.). She doesn’t necessarily act afraid of them but she does seem bothered by them. It’s...

Keep It Simple

Posted on 7/13/2022

I’m a single mother of a 2.5 year old. Her father has never been in the picture at all. She’s starting to notice other kids have a dad and she doesn’t. How do I explain his absence to her and...

Time to Change Course with 3-Year-Old

Posted on 7/12/2022

My 3 year old son has been defiant more lately. He will run away when I tell him to do something he doesn't want to. He did this around bed time recently and I said ok you're going straight to...

Stop Complaining!

Posted on 7/12/2022

I have a boy who just turned 8. We eat dinner and shortly after he complains he’s hungry (I fix good, homemade balanced meals). When I fix dinner, he complains he doesn’t like what we’re having....

Natural Consequences Are EffectiveTeachers

Posted on 7/9/2022

My 9 year old boy frequently acts like a baby and very odd in a socially unacceptable way like a feral child. When leaving his friends he will say “bye friends” in a silly voice. He also was...

6 YO PEEING HER PANTS

Posted on 7/8/2022

Our 6yr Girl has has recently started peeing her pants because she refuses to stop playing and use the restroom. She has admitted that she is just being "lazy" and thought she could hold it. ...

2 YEAR OLD DOING NORMAL THINGS WITH HIS THING

Posted on 7/7/2022

I have a two year old who is obsessed with his penis. I know this can be common for toddler boys as a form of exploration, but how do i set limits so hes not pulling it out in the grocery store or...

Potty training struggles

Posted on 7/6/2022

My husband and I are finally potty training our 28 month old and it's been a struggle. He understands our commands but decides to fight them at every turn. He resists going onto the potty and once...

3 YO SCREAMING OVER RANDOM STUFF AT BEDTIME

Posted on 7/6/2022

We have a 3.5 year old and each night, we have a routine that we go through with her - bath, put on pajamas, brush teeth, choose two books and read them, sing a couple of songs, and pray before...

When to Transition 3-Year-Old to 'Big Bed'?

Posted on 7/5/2022

My son just turned three. He slept two nights in his twin bed in the room with his older brother. On the third night he wanted to go back to his room and sleep in his baby bed because he could not...

DIVORCED DAD RUNNING THE USUAL SCAM

Posted on 7/2/2022

My 17 y/o daughter is from my first marriage. divorced when she was 3. Her stepdad and i have been married since she was 5. Long and short? We have done all of the parenting, all the tough...

YOUNG TEEN SEXUAL MISCONDUCT

Posted on 6/28/2022

We have a large and close-knit extended family with 27 cousins newborn to 16-years-old. A few months ago, at a family gathering there was a surprising incident of sexual misconduct involving a...

2nd Grader Needs to Change His Ways

Posted on 6/28/2022

Hi there, I have an 8-year old 2nd grader and his teacher has called us twice about his behaviour in school. He fidgets and moves, sometimes talks and jokes with friends whilst the teacher is...

Imposing consequences v. accepting consequences.

Posted on 6/27/2022

What to do when our teenagers won't accept consequences? Our daughters ages 15 and 13 won't accept consequences. They've been gone without telling us where and then coming home after curfew. So...

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