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19 Year-old Son's Girlfriend Glued to Her Phone

Posted on 3/22/2021

My nineteen-year-old son is living at home attending college during COVID. His girlfriend comes to visit on the weekends. She does not engage in conversation with me or make eye contact but is...

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Encouraging Peace

Posted on 1/11/2021

My son is 19 and is living at home while attending college. His father has a narcissistic personality disorder. He lives and works in another state but travels home every other week. There is...

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Dating Advice

Posted on 12/29/2020

My nineteen year old son, who is being treated for depression and anxiety is dating an 18 year old girl. They both live at home. My son is a freshman in college. The girlfriend is a senior in high...

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Sibling Relationship Stuck in Rough Water

Posted on 12/7/2020

We have a 21 year old son, who is still in college. He has severe animus toward his 17 year old sister, and has had it for the past 6-8 years. Little sister, for all practical purposes, is very...

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Who pays for what - the college years

Posted on 11/8/2020

19 yr old in college on substantial scholarship not taking her academics seriously and, given the trajectory, will lose the scholarship come year's end. From her history, I think she's just a...

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The Time for Tough Love is NOW

Posted on 10/31/2020

My son is 19 years old and has been graduated from high school for 1 1/2 years. His teen years were a struggle with almost not graduating, drug use and getting into trouble with the law. He no...

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Need more information

Posted on 10/28/2020

Hi- I need guidance on what type of mental health professional to get for my college age child. This teen has anxiety and it is grown worse since starting college. We are concerned about any...

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Time to learn to forgive and be grateful.

Posted on 10/22/2020

I have a nineteen year old son who is displaying behaviors of depression. He is not eating, hiding in his room all day, refuses to participate in friend activities unless it is with his...

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Only an Adult Chronologically

Posted on 7/12/2020

Our 19 year old daughter is living at home and working full time as a nursing aide at a local hospital. She has quit nursing school (the co-vid online situation did not work out well for her). In...

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ADHD: Fact and Fiction

Posted on 5/12/2020

My 19 year old daughter recently started seeing a counselor (not psychologist). After about 4 or 5 phone consultations, (phone only due to the COVID situation) the counselor tells us that our...

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Truth or Controversy?

Posted on 5/12/2020

One more question about ADHD ... I've read some of John's blogs on the topic and I know that his views are controversial. What resources (articles, websites, etc) would you point me toward that...

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Encouraging an adult child to be dependent.

Posted on 4/25/2020

Hi and thank you. Adult daughter has her own car she paid and her own insurance she pays. Father still will not let her drive by herself. He takes her to work and picks her up. She drives her car...

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Dads Are Never Done

Posted on 4/12/2020

I'm currently going through a divorce. Parenting has gotten increasingly harder for obvious reasons, and I'm the only disciplinarian. I'm concerned my kids - or some of them - are too old for me...

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Decisions fueled by guilt - not good.

Posted on 1/16/2020

Hi, I have written before regarding my stepson. He is 24 years old, has a college degree and lives at home with his mother. He has been diagnosed with interstitial cystitis, a chronic condition...

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College Student Has Lesson to Learn

Posted on 12/31/2019

I am a single mom of ten years to one son. He just completed his first semester of college at a Christian school. His faith is stronger than ever, he met some great people, was selected to be a...

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Custody Decision For 17 YO

Posted on 9/26/2019

John, I have read many of your books and listen to your podcast regularly. I am a Christian and agree with your biblical parenting principles. However, I am divorce from an atheist and he is...

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Adult Daughter Not Helping Around the House

Posted on 9/24/2019

Hello, I have a question about an older child living at home. Our daughter lives with us and is in her senior year of college. She is a very sweet person, respectful to us and works hard in school...

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It's Not Too Late!

Posted on 7/8/2019

Semi-independence has reared its ugly head in our youngest who goes off to college in the fall. Our mostly obedient and kindhearted daughter has basically grown a head so big we are surprised she...

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Adult daughter gone - now it is mom's time.

Posted on 4/15/2019

this concerns a 24 year old daughter. I'm disabled and although my daughter just moved out this past week I've been having issues with her telling me that it's not her "job" to help me for...

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Life After College is Too Comfortable- Time to Adult

Posted on 3/11/2019

Hello, My stepson in 23 and a recent college graduate with a communication degree. His father and I have been married 2 years. His parents are concerned about his seemingly lack of motivation to...

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Adult Daughter Troubles

Posted on 2/3/2019

Hi John, Thank you for your many books and tapes. I've listened to and read almost all of them. My daughter is adopted from Ukraine. We brought her home 2 days before her first birthday. ...

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Emancipation is never easy

Posted on 12/29/2018

I am divorced and remarried for 16 years. My ex cheated on me multiple times. Since our divorce which was a 3rd marriage he has been married 3x since. His most recent wife is 30 years his jr and a...

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To Curfew or Not To Curfew

Posted on 11/7/2018

My 18 yr old daughter attends college but lives at home. She makes stellar grades and is attending on a merit scholarship. She does chores around the house. She is a responsible person. My...

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Simple solutions are sometimes difficult to enforce.

Posted on 11/2/2018

I just need help knowing what, if any, kind of guidelines we should set for our 18 year old daughter. She goes to the University of Georgia. Right now, she has a partial scholarship and we are...

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Teen Proofing with Cell Phones

Posted on 9/12/2018

I am currently reading John's book Teen Proofing. In chapter 3 he discusses the six C-words, curfew, cash, car, cohorts, conflict, and consequences. He gives detailed explanations of how he and...

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phone use for 23 yo

Posted on 9/10/2018

HI, My husband and I have been married 2 years. I have 2 boys, 15 and 17, who live with us half the time. He has 2 boys, 23 and 20, who are rarely at our house because they are in college. All 4...

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Adult Children Moving Back Home

Posted on 8/24/2018

What would be your set of household rules for 2 adult children living with you (one recently returned home after living 2 years with friends who is currently working part time and finishing school...

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Find aFriend for college student

Posted on 8/9/2018

What is your opinion about phone apps like "Find My Friends" that allows parents to know their children's location? I had never heard of this but when my oldest left to college, she introduced me...

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Figuring things out isn't easy.

Posted on 7/6/2018

I have been married for more than 25 years. My husband came with a daughter from his first marriage and we have two of our own. He is very permissive-extremely guilt ridden and operates from the...

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'Tis the Season of Leaving and Cleaving

Posted on 7/3/2018

My son has joined my practice which was always our plan. He brought his girlfriend (also a dr & now is wife) back. They lived with us for 2 years. I trained them, shared my practice & they kept...

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Husband and 19 yr old step son have no relationship

Posted on 6/4/2018

My husband and 19 year old son seem to have absolutely no relationship. (My husband adopted my kids) I’ve been urging them for years to go do stuff together, whatever. 2 weeks ago, our counselor...

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19 year old living at home

Posted on 5/24/2018

Our 19-year-old son went to college for 1/2 of his freshman year - then quit & came home when he realized he was in over his head. Since then, he's worked but not a ton. He owes about $10k in...

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Get everything in writing when it comes to loaning adult children money

Posted on 5/2/2018

Two and a half years ago my 37 year old daughter and her husband needed a car to move from New York to California since he had lost his job but had another in California. So I sold my daughter...

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19 year old has alcohol related issues at college

Posted on 4/29/2018

Our 19 year old college freshman daughter, lives at school, 45 minutes away. We just found out that she has been sexually assaulted on campus. Alcohol was involved. Until this point, she has been...

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Homesteading adult son.

Posted on 3/21/2018

Our son is a 27 year old college graduate, (major is business/management) who still lives at home. He does have a full time job working at a K-5 school, but does not make anywhere near enough to...

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Emancipation Proclamation

Posted on 3/18/2018

My 22 year old son graduated recently with excellent grades and a degree in computer science. He’s moved home but shows no signs of wanting to find a job. He’s never had a job except for cutting...

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WWJR do?

Posted on 3/17/2018

My son is a junior in college and lives on campus which is about 40 minutes from our home. He gets good grades and has worked a part-time job the last couple of years. Up until recently he was...

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Problems with live-in adult stepdaughter continue

Posted on 2/10/2018

My 43 year old stepdaughter and her 9 year old daughter have been living with us for almost 3 years because her husband is an alcoholic and was violent when they were living in CA. They moved back...

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Shyness not a problem

Posted on 1/29/2018

I am concerned that my 20 year old son, who is a sophomore in college, is having trouble making friends. He has roommates but doesn't really hang around with them. He tried a fraternity but it...

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Smoking Weed

Posted on 12/4/2017

I have heard that it is so common along kids in college to smoke weed, it is absolutely normal for this generation. How to react if i know my child does smoke it and has find it as her relaxing...

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College students and control.

Posted on 10/16/2017

Our 21 year old son is on a full ride academic scholarship at an out of state university. When he was born, we set up a UGMA account for his college education, but he hasn’t needed it. He has...

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When an Adult Child Needs Help

Posted on 7/20/2017

Our 29 year old son was essentially a model child growing up- a good student with very few behavior issues. He graduated college in 2010, during which time he was was charged twice for...

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Require respect from college-age daughter

Posted on 7/16/2017

Our college student, who holds down a full time job in the summer and a 20-hour part-time job during the school year when she lives on campus, seems incapable or unwilling to follow through on the...

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Should Mom Monitor College Child's Tech Use?

Posted on 6/27/2017

I have a 19.5 year-old daughter in college and living at home. She is responsible about everything except her computer and cell phone use. She uses social media and texting more than is good for...

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Adult children taking sides.

Posted on 6/1/2017

We have 2 adult kids, 23 & 19 and they are being brainwashed & siding with my ex regarding a very critical & legal matter regarding a business/financial agreement for my elderly father of 87. My...

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19 yo Narcissist Revisited

Posted on 5/24/2017

We need more help in dealing with the daughter that I have asked questions about in the past. She is continuing her pattern of bitterness. She made no contact with me on a recent birthday and no...

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Safety first.

Posted on 4/23/2017

On 4/19/17 I asked a question about my 18 year old step son saying he would hit me. I also said that my husband stated he would divorce me if I called the police on the boy if he does hit me. I...

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Being responsible for adult children.

Posted on 4/20/2017

Our 19 year old son from my husband's first marriage returned home after his first college semester because he was having problems. We soon realized he had been on drugs. Our suspicion was...

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Unresolved marital issues impact parenting.

Posted on 4/19/2017

My 18 year old step son caused a horrible scene at our family Easter gathering this weekend. His younger brother was in trouble for being rude and disrespectful to both his father and me. However...

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