"A child who has learned to pay attention to parents will go to school prepared to pay attention to teachers. "

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What to do when Mom is human and makes a mistake.

Posted 5 days ago

What is the best way to recover after making a mistake? For instance, if 3 children are very close in age, and you punish the wrong child for something you later find out their sibling had done.

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Self-Destructing Son

Posted 1 week ago

I am so thankful for this site and your support. I feel empowered and encouraged. It seems very recently that whenever my son is asked to do a chore, he injures himself. These are simple age...

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Help! Quarantine Has Thrown a Kink in Our Schedule!

Posted 1 week ago

My husband has been working from home for the last few months and this has brought new challenges with our 5 and 6 year old boys. Prior to him working from home I had a routine of them playing in...

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Son hits himself when he loses TV privileges

Posted 2 weeks ago

When my son loses his tv privileges he starts hitting himself, screaming, saying he’s stupid, he hates himself etc and beginning he will do anything to earn tv back (I say no). There clearly is an...

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Toddler Tests the Car Seat Limits

Posted 2 weeks ago

My 18 month old always gets a short time out when he hits or throws food. Consequently, he almost never hits or throws food any more. However, since we have been going out more, he is now testing...

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No More Naps? Call the Doctor!

Posted 3 weeks ago

I’ve written about our middle son previously. He turned 4 a few weeks ago. He no longer naps but seems really tired during the day. He whines, seems clumsy (which I believe to be related to being...

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6 YO Girl Behaving Inappropriately with Friends and Lying About It

Posted on 6/2/2020

Private parts My 6 year old daughter and her friend, a boy have gotten in to trouble lately, because they keep trying to sneak off and pee in front of each other. I’m concerned because they...

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How to Achieve Peaceful Coexistence Between Children

Posted on 5/31/2020

I have a 6-year-old, and 2.5 year old. They are fighting A LOT. What’s the best way to discipline them? I try to let them work it out as much as I can, but it’s constant. Older child ripping toys...

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Disrespectful Tween

Posted on 5/22/2020

My 11 year old daughter gets upset when I correct her and calls me names in her heart not aloud; but she later tells me those rude things and apologises. (The most recent name she called me...

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"Battle of the Wills" with 2 Year Old is Frustrating

Posted on 5/21/2020

How should we handle a 23 months old that has been hitting us or attempting to hit, for a few months now, when angry or not permitted to do what she wants? Such as not being diaper changed or not...

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Three Snaps & out of the Spotlight

Posted on 5/20/2020

I have a just-turned 3-year-old son. He has a problem with needing constant attention. My husband and I routinely engage in our own activities around our son, and he can entertain himself well, so...

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Attention seeking years.

Posted on 5/20/2020

My three-year-old son has issues with being "ignored." I've already asked a question regarding his behavior around his grandparents (whom we live with), but I'd like some clarification regarding...

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Conquering a Three-Year Old Quarantine Quagmire

Posted on 5/5/2020

my son is 3 yr and 3 month old,he was very careful and neat. recently he started to get very aggressive especially during the quarantine in the house. He has been staying home for a month now. He...

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Posted on 4/27/2020

My 4 year old Grandson told me last night...that his Moms friend gave him some sleepy medicine and gave the 2 yr old brother some....brother was in bed asleep at 7. He further informed me that it...

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Food for Thought: To Obey or not To Obey--That is the Contention

Posted on 4/22/2020

I have a 2.5 year old who isn't speaking yet but understands the word "no". She has developed a habit of throwing food. This is not something she does occasionally, but for the majority of every...

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Hitting Needs to Stop for 3 Year Old

Posted on 4/19/2020

Lately my just turned 3 year old hits a lot, but he does it playfully and often even says it, "I'm going to hit you." I am not sure how to get him to stop. We have been firm in telling him he...

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Misbehavior list increases

Posted on 4/14/2020

Please help! Our almost 5-year old daughter behaves terribly and we do not know where to start. We read the book Well-behaved Child but we also need individual consultation with you. A little...

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Helping Kids Develop Good Habits Without Nagging

Posted on 4/14/2020

My 7 year old has a habit of leaving lights on when he leaves the room, leaving the toilet seat up, not flushing the toilet chain, leaving rubbish out, not putting his laundry in basket etc. How...

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5 Y/O Does Not Fully Comply With Consequence

Posted on 4/3/2020

My younger boy, age 5 is on the ticket system. When he loses his tickets he go upstairs to his room for the rest of the day except meals. Problem is he doesn't stay in his room. He sits at the top...

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Disrespectful 15 YO Daughter

Posted on 4/3/2020

My 15yr old daughter always stomps her foot when someone in her family cough or burp. It has become worse where if I make a tiny sound clearing my throat she bangs or hits whatever she is doing. ...

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Hands Off!

Posted on 3/29/2020

My 7 year is always making stupid annoying loud noises and shouting and he keeps doing this in his 8 month old sisters face. He also constantly grabs her hands and smothers her. They seem to get...

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Pre-Teen: A Lingering Fever

Posted on 3/24/2020

We are having some trouble with our 12 year old son. I can see how things have progressed and how we haven't quite followed the Rosemond plan. He is very rude with his sisters, he talks back a lot...

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6 Strikes in 1 At-bat

Posted on 3/15/2020

Hi John, my 9yr old daughter has taken to raising her voice, screaming, arguing, sarcasm and just downright disrespect when things aren't going her way. We have a target misbehavior chart and she...

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Take Charge of Bedtime Shenanigans

Posted on 3/12/2020

Feeling frustrated. I have a 6 year old, and 2 year old. They are hanging up on me! For example- I say it’s time for bed, and I tell them to come brush their teeth, the older one starts to...

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Children do not make good parents.

Posted on 3/11/2020

Hello; My son is getting worse as he gets older. He refuses to listen or obey. He talks back at every turn. We took his toys away over a week ago and told him he could get them back after his...

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Spiraling Seven Year Old

Posted on 3/2/2020

I would like some advice on how to handle our 7 year old son. Our family has had an extremely tough season. We had to re-home the dog my children grew up with (my sons best buddy) due to my sons...

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Talking v. Action; Reacting v. Responding

Posted on 3/2/2020

We have discovered our 16-year daughter has experimented with alcohol twice that we know of, small amounts, and with no denial. She actually confessed to the 2 accounts when questioned about a...

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The Terrible Twos Part II: The Teen Years

Posted on 2/27/2020

my daughter is 14 years old and she thinks she is crazy in love for a boy in her school , same grade. She doesn't have a smart phone . But she bought an old phone from a friend for 80 dollars and...

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Chaos that calls for a coach.

Posted on 2/25/2020

My soon to be 11 year old daughter “accidentally” hurts my just turned four year old son. I finally got her to confess that she sometimes hurts her brother and then tells us it was an accident....

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Pre- teen sent to principal's office

Posted on 2/19/2020

My 11 y/o daughter was just sent to the principal's office for carving a middle finger out of an eraser and saying that it represented her teacher. Princial said that she and other kids are...

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3 years old doesn't pay attetion to stories.

Posted on 2/18/2020

My 3 year old has always had difficulty listening to stories. I know how terribly important it is to read to children daily so I keep reading, but he’s not paying attention. Is he still getting...

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Teaching 3 year old to listen the first time.

Posted on 2/9/2020

Is the targeted behavior (for the ticket system) “Refusing to do what we tell you to do” too general for 3.25 year old twins? We want to stomp out their habit of giving us push back/delaying/...

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10 Year Old Testing Boundaries

Posted on 2/8/2020

I have been using the alpha speech. I make mistakes sometimes, escalating my voice because I'm frustrated. On the most part I'm pretty consistent. I noticed in alpha speech you do no use...

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Ok To Believe In Your Son and Still Not Believe Him

Posted on 2/6/2020

My teenager has been caught with marijuana. He said he was done with it and a few days later, we found more. I have read Johns book on raising teens and remember that he said their is a time to...

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Ball is in the Parent's Court

Posted on 1/31/2020

Hello, My son, who is 5 years old has a strong will and constantly gets in trouble at TK for bad behavior. Since infancy it was hard to deal with him, because he would refuse to obey. I tried to...

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How to Tame the Whining

Posted on 1/29/2020

My 5-year-old has regressed with his whining. His baby brother is going through his terrible 2’s, and I’m not sure if he’s trying to copy that behavior. I am presently trying to send him to his...

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Toddler hits mommy

Posted on 1/23/2020

Hi. My 27 month old toddler recently started hitting me when I say no to her, sometimes my husband as well, but it is most often directed at me (her mother) in moments of frustration. How should I...

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Lower the Boom on School Misbehavior

Posted on 1/22/2020

Our seven year old got sent to the principles office today for telling another student "I'm going to kill you". He was already one night into a three night bout of being banished to his room due...

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Gone From The Garden.....Now What?

Posted on 1/17/2020

I have a clarification question. When a child had been kicked out of the garden, are they supposed to also stay in said room when not at school? And if so should we leave something in their room...

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Little Victories

Posted on 1/16/2020

Not a question; more of a comment of thanks. I started the Ticket Method (at home for both home and school behaviors) a week ago and today my son's teacher (1st grade) sent me an email stating...

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Toddler ignores grandma.

Posted on 1/14/2020

Lately my 2 year old has moments where he is very rude to my mom (his grandma) who helps with childcare. He blatantly ignores her or tells her no or that he doesn't want to do x, y or z. My...

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6 Year Old Laughs When She Gets In Trouble

Posted on 1/13/2020

Good Morning, We have been using the ticket system and it's worked well. I have a 6 year old girl, who seems to have thrived from it until recently. Now when she loses a ticket she says "i...

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Ticket to change.

Posted on 1/13/2020

My 7-year old son has this habit of expressing his frustration, questioning me, or complaining about what I've told him to do or said, “no” to. He asks, “Why not?” and I answer simply, “Because...

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Time for a Reset

Posted on 1/12/2020

Clarification to my follow up question: When you say impose consequences... often my consequences are extra chores. I do not know what else to offer as a consequence. They're too young to take...

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6 and 9 Year Olds Won’t Do Chores

Posted on 1/12/2020

Follow up question: After reviewing chapter 3, i do believe I was using the ticket system properly... my targets were 1. Not doing as told 2. Lying 3. Talking back. The targets were the same...

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Alpha Speech is Key for Getting Kids to Obey

Posted on 1/10/2020

I have 2 girls, 9 & 6. They will not obey. They’ll lie that they did something and I have to verify completion or it’s never done. I used the ticket system and I had to take away every privilege...

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Alpha Speech is Key to Parental Leadership

Posted on 1/9/2020

Hello. Our daughter just turned 5. She has started to argue, history, say she didn’t hear, that she forgot and any number of excuses when she has disobeyed us. If we ask her to go put her toy...

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Is Child's Threat of Suicide a Cry for Help or for Attention?

Posted on 1/9/2020

My oldest is eleven and started middle school this year. Overall it has been a smooth transition. She has a great group of friends and likes school. She does not have a phone and has very limited...

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Hold Me! Never Let Me Go!

Posted on 1/8/2020

My daughter (age 2) demands to be held an excessive amount. By "excessive amount", I mean hours in a row. The more holding I give her, the more she demands. She gets furious when put down before...

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