Questions

Five Years Old: The Age of Fine Whine

Posted 1 week ago

My youngest, who is 5 years old, is feeling left out, saying the neighborhood kids don’t want to play with him. However, I don’t blame them! He is very whiny, tattles constantly, and doesn't share...

Mentally Drained Mom Seeking Advice

Posted 4 weeks ago

We have a 9 year old girl, 6 year old boy, and 4.5 year old girl. I've read Parenting by The Book twice and The Well Behaved Child twice in the past month. Our 9 year old is the biggest challenge,...

Raising Believers

Posted on 8/30/2022

We just started the ticket system and we have one target misbehavior for our 4 year old. Following directions. For example, when he loses a ticket because he doesn’t listen when we ask him to...

Time to Reel In 5-Year-Old

Posted on 8/16/2022

We have a 5 year old who has come a long way with behavior but lately hasn't been great at listening when told to do something. She will almost pretend we didn't say it or will just say "I will in...

Sometimes all you need is a hug and a dutch door.

Posted on 8/13/2022

When my 4 year old son loses all his privileges for the day, we cannot get him to stay in his room. What is something we can try? We calmly put him back in his room each time he runs out, but it...

Get Creative

Posted on 7/24/2022

Greetings! Our usually cheerful and happy 4yo daughter does not seem to react normally to punishment. At first she gets upset and cries, but very shortly into a time out or being sent to her room...

Natural Consequences Are EffectiveTeachers

Posted on 7/9/2022

My 9 year old boy frequently acts like a baby and very odd in a socially unacceptable way like a feral child. When leaving his friends he will say “bye friends” in a silly voice. He also was...

2nd Grader Needs to Change His Ways

Posted on 6/28/2022

Hi there, I have an 8-year old 2nd grader and his teacher has called us twice about his behaviour in school. He fidgets and moves, sometimes talks and jokes with friends whilst the teacher is...

Ticket System questions

Posted on 6/22/2022

I have some questions regarding the ticket system for a 3.5 year old. 1. What if he loses all of his tickets at the end of the day? One time he lost his last ticket but it was right before...

3-Year-Old in Hyper Mode

Posted on 6/22/2022

My 3.5 year old will get hyper and annoying when he is overtired or overexcited. When he’s in a “hyper mode”, he’s running around, trying to roughhouse, jumping into people, being loud and...

10-Year-Old Not Getting the Message

Posted on 6/16/2022

My ten-year-old son has recently been misbehaving at school with a friend. First, the teacher informed us that after the class was told not to play hide and seek inside the school building during...

Don't Dis R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Posted on 6/13/2022

Our 8 year old has grown increasingly disrespectful. He is perfect respectful to adults like teachers and parents of his friends, so it is primarily an issue at home. Often the disrespect is...

11 YO DISRESPECTS STEPMOTHER

Posted on 6/11/2022

My husband and I need help dealing with my 11 year old stepdaughter's disrespectful attitude towards us. I have been in her life for 6 years and this is an area that has been an issue the entire...

Two Year Old Being Terrible

Posted on 6/9/2022

My 2.5 year old in the past week has been extremely irritable, refusing to eat almost anything that isn’t Mac and cheese, and has reverted back to taking 2 naps a day. Tantrums and screaming are...

Good Cop Bad Cop

Posted on 6/6/2022

Ongoing tiff with Husband. Example scenario: 3 1/2 year old daughter is harassing 1 1/2 year old daughter and is put in timeout in her room. Every time she's in timeout she's screaming and losing...

Posted on 5/27/2022

.Our 16-year daughter is the last of three children. Our son is 29 and resides in South Africa with his wife. Our daughter, 20, has returned from college this summer. My husband believes in...

The Terrible Threes: Taking a Powder with the Doctor

Posted on 5/25/2022

Threenagers worse than the terrible twos? My 3.5 yr old daughter is very disrespectful toward myself and my husband. She's frequently whining, throwing tantrums, and during those tantrums...

Time for a Reboot

Posted on 5/18/2022

Since the first email our son (8yrs) was operated on for septic arthritis 6 months ago. The pain returned 2weeks ago (now gone). His hip bone has a small weakness and he needs to ensure he has no...

Bedtime Monsters

Posted on 5/15/2022

My 9 year old won’t go to bed at night, constantly crying about monsters etc which has never been an issue before. It seems to be one thing after the other. If he could sleep in my bed he would...

Posted on 5/15/2022

My 3.5 year old thinks he is running the show. He is bossy, and doing insubordination and attention seeking behaviors. I read your books and he was an easy toddler. But dad I forgot to use alpha...

Young daughter testing the boundaries

Posted on 4/21/2022

Hi! I am following up on questions I asked about a year ago that were titled "The Preschooler: in her Untamed Primal Glory" Using a parent coach and reading "The Well Behaved Child" (many...

No Response is a Response: Let Them Be Silly

Posted on 4/21/2022

How do we teach our children to stop the constant silly talk/noises? One child is diagnosed with ADHD, autism, etc. I've set up a rule that the first 30 minutes after wakeup and the last 30...

Fifteen-Year-Old Screen Addict

Posted on 4/18/2022

Our 15-year-old recently threw a fit, including punching, cursing and breaking things during the following incidents: 1) Took away make up after sneak purchase of $200 worth of make up without...

Parents Need To Be on The Same Page

Posted on 4/14/2022

In order to apply garden kick, should both parents sit down with the child and go over all the consequences for breaking family rules? One issue with my daughter is phone, I had asked her phone...

Exhausted and Longing for Peace

Posted on 4/4/2022

Discovering your books has put us on a new trajectory in our family after years of struggle with our "high misbehavior" 5 year old. For several months we've used the ticket system and "kicked him...

Middle of the Night Snacks Prolonging Mealtime Battles

Posted on 3/20/2022

In September I asked for advice on my picky 2-year-old. For 6 months, I have consistently tried the methods recommended. I didn't fuss over meals, just gave him small amounts of whatever I made,...

It's Not About the Makeup: Time for a Garden Kick

Posted on 3/20/2022

15-year old daughter very obsessed with make-up. Used our Amazon account to buy makeup Products without our knowing till I looked up order history. Took away all her makeup products, went...

Wake-Up Call Needed ASAP

Posted on 3/20/2022

Our 9-year-old is perfectly functional in a school setting (no issues with socializing, is meeting most benchmarks, is polite and caring). At home and when we are in public as a family, it is...

Deconstructing the Monster: the 3D's at age 10

Posted on 3/3/2022

We are ready to reset with our 10-year-old son so that he understands we mean what we say and even more, understands consequences. How do we do that in a way that will work (sort of feeling like...

Focus on Ability

Posted on 3/1/2022

Do you handle children with high-functioning autism differently than siblings who are also on The Program (daily/weekly charts)? We find we are having to "overlook" certain behaviors that would...

Au Pair Problems

Posted on 3/1/2022

Hi - We have a 2, 5, 7 and 8 year old. Three months ago we had a 25 yr old girl come live with us as an au pair. She helps with the children here and there and watches them when we have adult...

Child Abuse? I Think Not.

Posted on 2/21/2022

My 9 year old homschool son cries and freaks out when we mention he does school at my mother's house an hour away. The children usually stay a week or a few days. Is it child abuse if he doesn't...

Corporal punishment dilemma

Posted on 2/18/2022

Hello. We have three boys. They are 6, 10 and 11. We adopted them out of foster care about 3 years ago. When necessary as a tool to discipline our kids (and train them to make better choices next...

6-Year Old Fit-Pitching: Stay Strong, Mom!

Posted on 2/12/2022

Our six and a half year old is not getting her responsibilities completed on school nights. She is in school all day and then goes to an after school program for a couple of hours (we both work)....

Little Runaway

Posted on 2/10/2022

Our 11 yr old son has been spending a lot of time in room due to behavior and losing tickets. He decided yesterday after losing his tickets that he had enough and was running away. He has said...

How To Keep Your Child in His/Her Room

Posted on 2/1/2022

We are trying the ticket system with our 3 yr old son. Tonight, he went to bed early after throwing something at me (a major offense). At first we left his bedroom door open but he kept coming out...

Conquering 3-Year-Old's Ups and Downs (otherwise known as 'Bedtime Avoidance')

Posted on 1/30/2022

Any good ideas how to limit the I need a drink, I need to potty, I need....bedtime avoidance for 3 year olds?

10-Year-Old's Hitting Needs to Hit the Road for Good

Posted on 1/28/2022

We are currently using the ticket system to deal with two target behaviors. Hitting is not one of them. My 10-year-old daughter hit her four-year-old sister. This behavior does not happen very...

You're in Charge Now

Posted on 1/21/2022

Okay so I’m ready to administer a discipline plan for my daughter. My questions are; 1. How much is too much? I’m ready to take a lot of her favorite things away. But, what about life...

What to Say, What to Do?

Posted on 1/4/2022

How much to say of what we know? We randomly review our 15 year old daughter's school laptop. We just did so for the first time this school year a few days ago. We found screenshots of messages...

Posted on 12/30/2021

We have an 8-year-old son who throws violent tantrums. He has always been “a handful” so these fits aren’t anything new, they’re less frequent but much more destructive. In the past, we had a...

Disciplining With Tickets When Grandma Comes to Town

Posted on 12/29/2021

I just got your book, "The Well Behaved Child," and today I began using tickets (and Alpha speech) for my just 5-year-old son who is very loving and sweet but would be considered a "high...

Put the Brakes on 2.5-Year-Old Thrower

Posted on 12/27/2021

My non verbal 2.5 year old is a thrower. Especially at the face. She will throw toys in my face. She will throw her food and cutlery at my 8 year old son in the face. I don’t know what to do,...

I am Woman, Hear Me Roar---Even Though I'm Only 4!

Posted on 12/7/2021

I am at my wits end. I am doing my best to do the ticket system with my children. My 4 year old daughter has maybe made it 1 day, at least until bedtime, without losing all of her tickets since we...

Clarifying the Garden Kick

Posted on 12/4/2021

Does kicking out of the garden mean the child is confined to their new boring room for the duration of the time? Do you restrict them from playing outside with sibblings or friends? Can they...

8-Year-Old Ruling the Roost (Follow-up)

Posted on 11/24/2021

Okay in regards to my prior question. I purchased the book. Thank you. Can you please tell me some examples of what you mean right now so I can start turning the tables ASAP! Instead of...

Nip It. Nip It Good.

Posted on 11/17/2021

Hi ParentGuru, I have a question about our 5yr old son who has come home from prep (1st year of primary school here in Melbourne Australia) after an incident in which he threw another student's...

Change Tactics to Curb 5-Year-Old's Outbursts

Posted on 11/11/2021

My otherwise mild-mannered son who just turned 5 has a habit of making vocal outbursts like a crazed lunatic or someone with mental problems. It's usually excited yelling or forced laughter...

Change can happen but will it?

Posted on 11/6/2021

My 29 year old grandson is a higher functioning autistic boy. As long as I can remember, this boy will not stop stealing.He is always remorseful after the fact, but it is just a matter of time...

Transition from Nap Time to Quiet Time

Posted on 11/2/2021

Hi, our daughter is 2yrs, 10mo old. What age is appropriate for naps to go away? Our daughter fights naps nearly every day. The problem is that if she doesn’t get a nap is she gets extremely...

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