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Gone From The Garden.....Now What?

Posted 4 days ago

I have a clarification question. When a child had been kicked out of the garden, are they supposed to also stay in said room when not at school? And if so should we leave something in their room...

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Little Victories

Posted 5 days ago

Not a question; more of a comment of thanks. I started the Ticket Method (at home for both home and school behaviors) a week ago and today my son's teacher (1st grade) sent me an email stating...

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Toddler ignores grandma.

Posted 1 week ago

Lately my 2 year old has moments where he is very rude to my mom (his grandma) who helps with childcare. He blatantly ignores her or tells her no or that he doesn't want to do x, y or z. My...

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6 Year Old Laughs When She Gets In Trouble

Posted 1 week ago

Good Morning, We have been using the ticket system and it's worked well. I have a 6 year old girl, who seems to have thrived from it until recently. Now when she loses a ticket she says "i...

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Ticket to change.

Posted 1 week ago

My 7-year old son has this habit of expressing his frustration, questioning me, or complaining about what I've told him to do or said, “no” to. He asks, “Why not?” and I answer simply, “Because...

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Time for a Reset

Posted 1 week ago

Clarification to my follow up question: When you say impose consequences... often my consequences are extra chores. I do not know what else to offer as a consequence. They're too young to take...

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6 and 9 Year Olds Won’t Do Chores

Posted 1 week ago

Follow up question: After reviewing chapter 3, i do believe I was using the ticket system properly... my targets were 1. Not doing as told 2. Lying 3. Talking back. The targets were the same...

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Alpha Speech is Key for Getting Kids to Obey

Posted 1 week ago

I have 2 girls, 9 & 6. They will not obey. They’ll lie that they did something and I have to verify completion or it’s never done. I used the ticket system and I had to take away every privilege...

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Alpha Speech is Key to Parental Leadership

Posted 1 week ago

Hello. Our daughter just turned 5. She has started to argue, history, say she didn’t hear, that she forgot and any number of excuses when she has disobeyed us. If we ask her to go put her toy...

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Is Child's Threat of Suicide a Cry for Help or for Attention?

Posted 1 week ago

My oldest is eleven and started middle school this year. Overall it has been a smooth transition. She has a great group of friends and likes school. She does not have a phone and has very limited...

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Hold Me! Never Let Me Go!

Posted 1 week ago

My daughter (age 2) demands to be held an excessive amount. By "excessive amount", I mean hours in a row. The more holding I give her, the more she demands. She gets furious when put down before...

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No Way to Treat a 7 Year Old Boy

Posted 1 week ago

My son is 7 years old and in 1st grade. He's had some problems with negative self-talk and is disruptive in class. (I think he’s a perfectionist who’s big on justice and is bored). His grades are...

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The Age-Gap Triplicate

Posted 2 weeks ago

My kids (11-girl, 10-girl, 3-boy) were driving me crazy with all the squabbling. Especially as the 3 year old gets older. All 3 kids are on the ticket system. I’ve read a lot of the q & a on here...

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College Student Has Lesson to Learn

Posted 3 weeks ago

I am a single mom of ten years to one son. He just completed his first semester of college at a Christian school. His faith is stronger than ever, he met some great people, was selected to be a...

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Should we cancel Christmas?

Posted on 12/16/2019

We are a family with 4 kids (13 year old boy, 13 year old girl, 11 year old girl, 4 year old girl). None of them have any electronics (since October 2019). The three older ones did have cell...

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Argumentative two and a half year old

Posted on 12/14/2019

Our two and a half year old daughter is argumentative. There will be times when we’ve told her to do something in a clear manner and she will outright say “No, I will not do...” (fill in the...

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Mouthy Teens Ups the Vitriol

Posted on 12/9/2019

Okay, I’ve had this subscription for years now and have yet to write in with a question, as many, and as urgent, as I’ve felt they have been in previous years. So I hope you’ll give me a little...

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Relationship Reboot

Posted on 12/9/2019

This is a Part II to an early question submitted about a very strong-willed and increasingly mouthy 16-year old daughter. Please bear with someone who has subscribed for YEARS without submitting...

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Young Teenage Boy Has Problem To Solve

Posted on 12/2/2019

Finally: school and studies. Being in junior high now we are trying to encourage better study habits for our son. He has always found school easy and not brought work home to review while still...

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Kerfuffling Kids

Posted on 11/28/2019

Hi! I have a 9 year old daughter and boy/girl twin 7 year olds. The twins tend to play really nicely together. They are also in the same class and the same group on the swim team. My 9 year old...

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Argumentative 10-Year-Old Needs a Reality Check

Posted on 11/26/2019

Argumentative 10 year old- May daughter is pushing back on everything. When told to do something (anything) she grumbles, sighs, complains, etc. My husband and I have been working on "yes mom,...

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Ignoring Bad Habits

Posted on 11/25/2019

My 9-year-old daughter still puts things in her mouth and chews on them like a toddler: Lego pieces, wrappers, etc. It seems like she has an oral fixation and always needs to be chewing or sucking...

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Rebellious 25 monts old

Posted on 11/23/2019

Hi My 25 month old daughter is potty trained now. I started when she was 23 month old, and 3 weeks ago until she got completely trained even at night. since yesterday she has been having pee...

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Managing Misbehavior on Vacation

Posted on 11/16/2019

After a long string of troubling incidents involving our 7yr old (soon to be 8) son, we decided to try John's "kicking out of the garden" strategy. We are going on vacation (gone 9 days) next...

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Grounded means...

Posted on 11/13/2019

My son is 13. He has been lying fairly often. He got a detention at school but told me he was getting help from the teacher with his work he didn’t understand. Of course I found out when the...

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Nip Physical Aggression in the Bud

Posted on 11/8/2019

We have been doing the ticket system with our four-year-old for the last four days. He has one targeting behavior, “refusing to listen,” and five tickets. Every day since we started, he has lost...

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The Struggle is Real

Posted on 11/6/2019

We have struggled with our child being ashamed to be seen with either of us (her parents) in public, to the point that she acts in a way that hurts us. She is now in middle school (7th grade);...

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When Normal Becomes a Disorder

Posted on 11/6/2019

My son is six years old, and he started kindergarten this year. Somewhere around week three or four, I got a call from his teacher stating that he has "impulsivity issues". I did a quick google...

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Focus More on the Behavior than the Diagnosis

Posted on 11/6/2019

I have a 10 year old son who was once diagnosed as autistic. A few years later we had him tested again in which the doctor couldn't understand why he was labeled that way and said he was not...

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Prevarications, Pranks and Privileges

Posted on 11/1/2019

My 5 year old child seems to be developing a habit for lying. Last night, he stayed with a friend and her two kids while I attended a meeting. On our way home, he told me this..."Zachary did...

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Train Him Up

Posted on 10/24/2019

How do you deal with a 4 year old that when he is told “no” or asked to do something he does not want to do, ends up doing that specific thing or has a tantrum to some degree or another. How do...

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Harsh Consequences?

Posted on 10/24/2019

I have been using the ticket system with my 5-year-old for about a week now. When he loses his tickets he’s sent to his room for the remainder of the day. However, my son seems to be dealing with...

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The Taming of the Crew

Posted on 10/23/2019

I need help understanding the difference between sibling rivalry and sibling abuse. I know I'm supposed to punish both children equally when they fight, but what about in a situation where the...

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Tickets for 3 year olds?

Posted on 10/17/2019

We started the ticket system with our three and 5 year old boys about two months ago. I feel like our 3 year old may be too young for it. The afternoons are particularly rough because he has...

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Reconnecting with an Out of Control Child

Posted on 10/16/2019

I need help formulating a garden kick for my 10 yr old daughter. She is the oldest of 6 children, has behaved badly since she was 3, and is now increasingly unable to coexist in the home with her...

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5 yo kicking must be nipped in the bud

Posted on 10/9/2019

We recently adopted a 9 month Little boy. We have a three-year-old and five-year-old boy who love their new brother very much but have had some behavior issues since adopting him. I think it would...

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3 years old whines and cries

Posted on 10/9/2019

How do I get my newly turned 3 year old to stop whining and crying when it comes time for chores and picking up after herself?

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Teach Tweenager How to Manage Anger

Posted on 10/8/2019

Hi There, My daughter will be 11 yo on February, she is such a sweet/sensetive girl who likes to please others, but when she becomes angry she can not control it , she melts down for a while then...

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Nip Disrespectful Behavior in the Bud

Posted on 10/3/2019

I home school my 7-year-old son. We are working on obeying and being respectful. Often when I tell him something he responds disrespectfully. He will yell back at me or say something mean and then...

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Disrespectful 7-Year-Old

Posted on 10/2/2019

We are using the discipline strategies taught in Well-Behaved Child. I home school 7 and 5 year old boys. My 7 year old responds to me with disrespectful remarks. For example: "You are so mean, I...

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Toddlers in "Time Out" can create More "Tired Out" Parents

Posted on 10/2/2019

For a 2 year old who is able to climb out of a playpen (and makes a game of it if the parent tries to keep them in), what else would make a suitable time-out area? We live in a rented...

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Sassy Toddler

Posted on 9/30/2019

Ever since I started implementing a 5 minute time-out for specific misbehaviors (such as throwing food or hitting his sister) after his second birthday, my 2 year old son has started showing...

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Too Many Expectations for 9-Year-Old

Posted on 9/25/2019

My daughter is 9, she is very respectful (although disobeying and arguing are not respectful) and has great manners ("yes ma'am", "yes, sir"). She has given me a run for my money her whole life...

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Discipline Heartily(with Infusions of Affection)

Posted on 9/22/2019

Good Morning, I am a single dad of 3 boys ages 7 and 3 yo twins. Recently one of the twin boys has been acting out at preschool and at home. He wont listen to instruction, throw toys, hit his...

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Name Calling Not OK For Young Boy

Posted on 9/20/2019

Hello, I received an email from my child's teacher today. This is what it said. "Hi, I wanted to let you know that R had to be spoken to about hurting a child's feelings on Wednesday. He was...

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Behavior getting worse not better

Posted on 9/15/2019

I just started reading the well behaved child. I have a 6 year old girl and a 10 year old boy. Their behavior has gotten worse. My daughter comes out of her room constantly after having been...

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Enforcing Consquences

Posted on 9/15/2019

I have read Well Behaved Child. We are dealing with our 7 year old granddaughter (we have legal custody since July) that has high misbehaviors. We are doing the chart. Our one concern is keeping...

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Grandparent Etiquette

Posted on 9/15/2019

I am a single mom with a 6-year-old girl. Both sets of grandparents live close by, and she is very close to both of them. I am trying to teach her that when we visit, she is to say hello,...

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"Doctor" Makes House Call for 5 YO Preschooler

Posted on 9/7/2019

My 5 year old girl is strong willed, defiant and disobedient. She throws frequent tantrums when not getting her way. At school she is fine but anywhere else she acts out (screams, rages, scowls,...

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