Questions

Less Help May Be Better For 11YO

Posted on 4/3/2025

How can I help my 11 yo daughter take responsibility for her mistakes and care more about doing right than fear getting caught? Often, her apologies are insincere and she walks away as if she was...

A Booklover's Guide to Agony

Posted on 2/21/2025

I just received a call from our Head of School stating our 8 year old son threatened another child at school. This is completely out of character for him and when asked about he said"he let his...

Tattling vs important information- 4 yro

Posted on 12/3/2024

At what point should we discipline for tattle telling? Our 4 year old loves to tell us when our 1-year old is doing something "wrong." My problem is that sometimes the information she gives me is...

Game on at nap time.

Posted on 10/16/2024

My three year old grandson, whom I watch twice a week, often runs from me or hides behind a chair when I try to take him up for his nap or put him to bed. He also does it to my daughter, but not...

13 YO STEALING MONEY FROM PARENTS

Posted on 9/25/2024

My 13 year old son is stealing money from us. Both from my purse and our envelope system. I was suspicious for a long time, but now I am confident it's him. My guess it's to spend money on junk...

Daughter needs the Dr.'s help

Posted on 9/18/2024

I have a 5-yr old daughter disrupting her class on a daily basis. Her teacher has asked that we speak with her as it has become a problem as her teacher is constantly having to stop and start...

5 YO's Low Tolerance for Frustration is Frustrating Mom

Posted on 8/20/2024

Our 5 year old son has little control over his emotions. A year ago it was mainly struggling with perfectionism and crying about not doing something the “right” way, lately it’s a big outburst...

Call the "Doctor" for Damsel in Distress

Posted on 7/7/2024

Our 7 yo daughter will act like a damsel in distress—getting fake hurt or acting like she can’t do something. My husband and I ignore it, or nonchalantly guide her to her room to ‘rest’. It has...

It's Always Something

Posted on 6/21/2024

Good day. My son (7.5) has come a long way on many behavioral issues. One infuriating thing we are still having trouble with is his tendency to break things. I get the impulse to "test"...

Never spar with a picky eater.

Posted on 5/4/2024

My daughter (3 yrs.) has become a picky eater. Before she would occasionally be picky but most of the time did pretty decent with what we gave her. But she has recently been a very picky eater. I...

Should My Teen Miss Prom?

Posted on 4/9/2024

What is your advice regarding grounding teenagers such that they miss major milestone events or rites of passage? I would greatly like to avoid punishments such as missing prom or graduation;...

Micro Mom-Ager Neighbor

Posted on 3/30/2024

We live on a street where there are a lot of kids. My boys, 9 and 11 years old, are outside all the time playing and my house tends to be the place where all the kids play. If my kids or other...

Not Listening the First Time

Posted on 3/20/2024

We believe in the necessity of our children obeying the first time they are told-without challenge, delay or excuse. However, we also wish to walk the tightrope of a loving, nourishing home,...

Help for HIgh Self-esteem Seizures

Posted on 1/24/2024

Six-year-old daughter has been kicked out of the garden twice for nighttime issues: screaming, throwing things, manipulating us to try to sleep with her or give her x,y,z. She was “kicked out” at...

How to use charts/tickets with 3 kids

Posted on 1/13/2024

How to decide to use chart or ticket system for 3 kids? 11 y/o and 9 y/o sons would have same misbehaviors #1 Do things 1st time asked #2 Clean up after yourself #3 Aggravating sibling (Sibling...

Time for a Visit From the Doctor

Posted on 12/29/2023

I'm at a loss for direction. I tried lumping my kids together with a chart just to find how different they are. My 4 y/o loves to relentlessly antagonize my 5 y/o whiner, and my 7 y/o loves to...

How much to expect from toddlers

Posted on 12/5/2023

How do I know where to draw the line between what to expect for proper behavior and what is too advanced for the kids (girl 2.5 and boy 1.5) to learn? My husband and I have high standards of what...

Tickets. I’ve got your tickets!

Posted on 11/4/2023

Hello - we have been using some form of the ticketing system with our 5 year old daughter for about a year now. It doesn’t seem like we have made much progress. She is still consistently...

Troubled Teen/Perplexed Parents

Posted on 10/30/2023

Hello, We have a problem dealing with our 15 yr old son's violent behavior when we take his phone or he gets grounded. He has been caught taking his older brother's car late at night (without...

An Inconvenient Phobia

Posted on 10/27/2023

Our oldest daughter just turned six. She’s always had a hard time at the doctor & dentist. At almost 3, she was put under to put caps on her front teeth, and when one of them developed an abscess...

9 YEAR OLD PRACTICING TO BECOME A CLOWN

Posted on 10/18/2023

My 9 year old son is in 4th grade. He has always been good with others but a strong-willed challenger at home. My husband and I always felt that that meant we were doing our job, with good reports...

1st Grade Son Prefers Silly Play

Posted on 10/8/2023

My 1st grade son who has always preferred oral "silly" play including making rasberry sounds, whistling, and staccato outbursts of word like but unintelligible syllables, and exaggerated laughter,...

2YO's Fascination with Fido's Bowl

Posted on 9/11/2023

My son is 2 weeks away from turning 2. He plays in the dog bowl of food and water multiple times a day. We have told him not to and have calmly put him in timeout but he’s not seeming to get it or...

Testing 1 2 3

Posted on 8/17/2023

My children (2 and 1) are very used to having their grandparents around all the time since we currently live together while we try to find a house. My parents are away for about 10 days and the...

Mom and 2yo girl in Great Transition

Posted on 7/15/2023

How do I transition my daughter (2 yr) to the next season? Right now we are in the first season, I think John calls it the season of servitude or something like that. But I know she has to take...

Not Always Smooth Sailing for 2 and 4YO

Posted on 7/13/2023

I am trying to determine age-appropriate behavioral expectations for a 4.5 year old. He is obedient and does small chores. He knows there are behaviors completely unacceptable (hitting, throwing...

Book Etiquette and Two Year Olds

Posted on 6/27/2023

My daughter (2) has done pretty well in being gentle with books. But recently she has started tearing pages and biting books. It doesn’t matter if they are normal books or board books, she is hard...

2 yo girl bullies little brother

Posted on 6/27/2023

My daughter (2) has been biting her brother (1). It’s not just a nibble. It’s a hard chomp that leaves him sobbing and with teeth marks on his arm or wherever she bit him. She also pushes him,...

15 YO THINKS HE HAS IT ALL FIGURED OUT...FANCY THAT!

Posted on 6/26/2023

15 yr old is adamant his 13 yr old brother is a liar and will bring it up every chance he gets. 13 yr old was packing for a camp last week and told me he still needed swim trunks. I thought...

Warts and All

Posted on 6/2/2023

My 6 year old son has some warts on his hands. He pitched a fit at the pediatric dermatologist today while getting his warts frozen off. He began screaming before the procedure even began. The...

Discipline at home for behavior at school

Posted on 4/19/2023

We have already raised our 4 daughters, the youngest is 24. We are currently, for some incredible reasons, in our third month of fostering to adopt a young child. Things at home are slowly...

BeFuddled Father Facing Four Females

Posted on 4/10/2023

Hello, I know you don't know the history at all with my step-daughters. However, we gave out Easter candy to our 3 daughters (2 step-daughter and one is my own). The 16 year old step-daughter...

Making Tickets Work

Posted on 3/2/2023

Hello - My wife and I have loved "The Well-Behaved Child". We implemented the ticketing for a 4 year old daughter and have noticed some improvements but there is more work to do. The consistent...

4 year old crying episodes

Posted on 1/11/2023

My grandson is 4 to be 5 in May of this year 2023. He is in a pre K public school and has been since September of 2022. He has been , we think, behind in his personal growth. During the birth he...

Puppy challenge

Posted on 1/9/2023

We got a puppy in July, and while the dog is great I’m not able to get my kids to stay off of him, mainly my son (6yrs). He seems to think he is a stuffed animal or a toy and plays way too rough....

Silly boy, listening is for kids

Posted on 11/13/2022

Our 4 year old was a pretty good listener right up to when he turned 4. We've weathered some big tantrums, which seem to mostly be in decline (frequency & length). Now, he has started to just "be...

Let's talk about sex

Posted on 11/9/2022

My 14 yr old daughter has been talking/FaceTiming with a 14 yr old boy from school and it has been sweet and innocent until this last week. They have been asking each other questions about sex. To...

childminder refuses to watch 9 yo boy

Posted on 10/24/2022

What is a good consequence when you pay for your 9 year old to go to holiday clubs and childminder so you can work but they misbehave and complain so much they don’t want to be there that staff...

10 Year Old with Violent Fits, Divorced Parents and "trifecta of diagnoses"

Posted on 10/13/2022

My 10 year old son has the adoptive trifecta of diagnoses: "on the autism spectrum", oppositional defiant disorder, and ADHD. Sometimes he has violent fits - although now they're down to 1 or 2...

Need more banger Info please!

Posted on 9/14/2022

We read the Q&A on "10 month boy bangs head" which is exactly what our son does except he's now 18 months old and has been doing it for so long he literally has a unicorn bump growing on his head....

7 year old and The Ticket to Controlling Their Own Behavior

Posted on 8/25/2022

My 7 yr. old daugher is the youngest of (2) kids, and her anger at home has a short fuse. Every time our 9 yr. old son engages her (as siblings do), she explodes and starts hitting and screaming...

Sometimes all you need is a hug and a dutch door.

Posted on 8/13/2022

When my 4 year old son loses all his privileges for the day, we cannot get him to stay in his room. What is something we can try? We calmly put him back in his room each time he runs out, but it...

Enforcement is difficult.

Posted on 8/11/2022

My son is 12 years old and has been confined to his bedroom for the past month and a half for getting F’s in school. My husband thought he was acting suspicious so he peeked in his window and...

Get Creative

Posted on 7/24/2022

Greetings! Our usually cheerful and happy 4yo daughter does not seem to react normally to punishment. At first she gets upset and cries, but very shortly into a time out or being sent to her room...

Stop Complaining!

Posted on 7/12/2022

I have a boy who just turned 8. We eat dinner and shortly after he complains he’s hungry (I fix good, homemade balanced meals). When I fix dinner, he complains he doesn’t like what we’re having....

Natural Consequences Are EffectiveTeachers

Posted on 7/9/2022

My 9 year old boy frequently acts like a baby and very odd in a socially unacceptable way like a feral child. When leaving his friends he will say “bye friends” in a silly voice. He also was...

6 YO PEEING HER PANTS

Posted on 7/8/2022

Our 6yr Girl has has recently started peeing her pants because she refuses to stop playing and use the restroom. She has admitted that she is just being "lazy" and thought she could hold it. ...

9 year old's Frequent Night Time Urinating Best Evaluated by Pediatrician

Posted on 6/26/2022

My 9-year-old frequently gets out of bed to go to the toilet at night. I don’t mind but our house is laid out that he has to leave his bedroom, come down the stairs, past our living room, dining...

Tween in need of self respect

Posted on 6/26/2022

Hi there, I have an 11 year old who is a pretty good tween most of the time - independently does her homework, and is helpful around the house, respectful with teachers and peers. However with...

3-Year-Old in Hyper Mode

Posted on 6/22/2022

My 3.5 year old will get hyper and annoying when he is overtired or overexcited. When he’s in a “hyper mode”, he’s running around, trying to roughhouse, jumping into people, being loud and...

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