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Getting Started on the Ticket System

Posted on 9/14/2021

At what age is it appropriate to do 2 sets of tickets? One for sibling conflict and one for personal? How long should I wait to start there personal ones? We just started sibling conflict about a...

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Bossy Miss 6

Posted on 8/17/2021

Hi there! My 6 year old (Miss 6) tends to hugely overreact. It's not tantrums, per say, so the tantrum spot is not utilised. It's more anger and "wordiness." (Miss 6: "I asked sister THREE...

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10 year old and 8 year old participating in sibling rivalry

Posted on 4/10/2021

My son (age 10) and my daughter (age 8) argue and fight, but it is mostly my son who antagonizes his sister and she ends up telling on him to us. It happens ALL day long. I try to not take sides...

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Meltdowns, Scratches, and Wrestling Matches: Dealing With the Brothers 3

Posted on 3/1/2021

Over the past year, we have spent more time together as a family at home. While some of this has been good, we have also seen conflict between our oldest boys, ages 4 and 6, increase. Sometimes...

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Boys' Behavior is Ruining the Morning Routine

Posted on 1/28/2021

My boys are on the ticket system for disobedience and fighting. They have chores every morning after breakfast before we start homeschool and things are going off the rails so to speak with the...

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21 month old steals sister's toys

Posted on 12/28/2020

Lately our 21 month old seems to make it his mission to steal toys away from his 3.5 year old sister. While I realize that he doesn’t really understand sharing, it feels like all I do all day is...

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Sibling Relationship Stuck in Rough Water

Posted on 12/7/2020

We have a 21 year old son, who is still in college. He has severe animus toward his 17 year old sister, and has had it for the past 6-8 years. Little sister, for all practical purposes, is very...

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Taming Hitting Between Younger Siblings

Posted on 11/4/2020

My two year old and my 4 year old are constantly hitting each other what should I do ?

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Curb Behavior With Alpha Speech

Posted on 10/6/2020

My son is 3-years-old and is a sweet boy and had a pretty good first two and a half years. Three months ago he started bluntly saying "No" to us and being more aggressive towards his brother, and...

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Sibling Warfare

Posted on 10/2/2020

My 6 year old son is bullying and hitting his 4 year old brother behind my back and telling him not to tell and lying about it to me. The 4 year old is acting out in daycare, already being kicked...

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It's my room

Posted on 9/10/2020

My 6 year old won’t allow her 3yr old brother in her room, especially if we are working on her homework. Unfortunately, there are times that I’m home alone and he needs to be with us. She try’s to...

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2-Year-Old and 4-Year-Old Can't Get Along

Posted on 8/20/2020

My 2 year old and my 4 year old seem to not be able to stay with each other for 5 min with out fitting over something ... should I say something or let them work it out because it seem like a...

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Big Sister 11 wants some space from 8 year old brother

Posted on 6/24/2020

Thank you so much for the thoughtful and helpful ways you've equipped me as a parent since signing up to this site. I've come to understand that I should let my kids resolve issues they have with...

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Help! Quarantine Has Thrown a Kink in Our Schedule!

Posted on 6/23/2020

My husband has been working from home for the last few months and this has brought new challenges with our 5 and 6 year old boys. Prior to him working from home I had a routine of them playing in...

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How to Achieve Peaceful Coexistence Between Children

Posted on 5/31/2020

I have a 6-year-old, and 2.5 year old. They are fighting A LOT. What’s the best way to discipline them? I try to let them work it out as much as I can, but it’s constant. Older child ripping toys...

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Teach instead of rescue.

Posted on 5/27/2020

My 11 year old daughter has noticed that her 8 year old brother is academically more able than she is, particularly in Maths. Over the years, we've repeatedly told her to celebrate her own...

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Sibling Must Work it Out!

Posted on 3/1/2020

I have two children: An 8-year-old girl and a 3-year-old boy. For the most part, they play really well on their own. Whenever my daughter doesn’t have school, however, we have conflict. My son...

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Siblings Must Work It Out!

Posted on 2/25/2020

I’ve got two kids, an almost 8 year old girl and a 3 year old boy. For the most part, they play really well on their own. Whenever she doesn’t have school, we have the most conflict. He loves...

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10 Year Old Testing Boundaries

Posted on 2/8/2020

I have been using the alpha speech. I make mistakes sometimes, escalating my voice because I'm frustrated. On the most part I'm pretty consistent. I noticed in alpha speech you do no use...

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The Age-Gap Triplicate

Posted on 1/1/2020

My kids (11-girl, 10-girl, 3-boy) were driving me crazy with all the squabbling. Especially as the 3 year old gets older. All 3 kids are on the ticket system. I’ve read a lot of the q & a on here...

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Kerfuffling Kids

Posted on 11/28/2019

Hi! I have a 9 year old daughter and boy/girl twin 7 year olds. The twins tend to play really nicely together. They are also in the same class and the same group on the swim team. My 9 year old...

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The Taming of the Crew

Posted on 10/23/2019

I need help understanding the difference between sibling rivalry and sibling abuse. I know I'm supposed to punish both children equally when they fight, but what about in a situation where the...

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Resetting The Dial Can Be Best Bet

Posted on 10/21/2019

What are the suggested number of target behaviors and daily tickets for children of the following ages: 1) boy age 5 - generally a low-misbehaver, main problem is tantrums, sometimes disobeys or...

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Sibling Rivalry Not Improving

Posted on 9/22/2019

Hello! Our daughter (26 months) has been hitting, scratching, biting etc her sister (almost 4.5 years old). At first we told her a firm no but now the incidents have increased and we put her in...

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3 y/o and 1 y/o siblings learning to play together

Posted on 9/18/2019

My son is 3 years old and my daughter is 1 year old. My son is really good about playing by himself and lining up his cars when he plays; however, my daughter really likes to bug him. She...

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Toddler Trouble

Posted on 8/10/2019

What do I do to toddler sister who pushes down sister who is learning to sit and stand?

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The Enemy of my Enemy is my Sibling

Posted on 7/14/2019

We have five children, and multiple questions, but I'll just focus on one here. My oldest son and daughter (ages 10 and 7) fight regularly. My son is a teaser, and my daughter is a screecher. ...

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Siblings and Summer

Posted on 6/18/2019

Hi! I have an 8 year old daughter and boy/girl twin 6 year olds. I am writting in because my kids have been fighting a lot and gotten physical; pushing, hair grabbing, kicking sometimes even...

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I'm Not Your Friend

Posted on 6/3/2019

My four year old has been telling her younger sister who is three that she will not play with her, be her best friend, etc. if she doesn’t play the way she wants or gives her the toy she is...

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14 month old harming Mom and family members

Posted on 5/28/2019

My 14 month old baby has started scratching my face, and pulling my hair when upset. In the past few days she has also started pinching and biting her 4 yo sister and 5 yo brother (who are very...

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Kicking An Angry 17 Year Old Out Of The Garden of Eden

Posted on 4/13/2019

Our 17 year old son is completely out of control. None of the consequences that we have given him have helped. His biggest problem is his angry outbursts. He has destroyed his relationship with...

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Sibling Conflict and Bizarre Behavior

Posted on 3/20/2019

One day at church, my husband noticed my 11 YO daughter pinching her hand when he stopped our daughters having a silent squabble in the pew. Her younger sister is 16 months younger and often they...

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Sibling Rivalry

Posted on 2/19/2019

my daughters, age 5 and 2, constantly fight. I agree siblings need to settle their own quarrels; however, my 2 year old is still physically agressive (pulling hair, hitting), and sometimes I...

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Separate but Equal

Posted on 2/10/2019

I have an introverted, sensitive (gentle and kind) four-year-old son and an extroverted, physically rambunctious two-year-old son. The two year old is physically aggressive (biting and hitting)...

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14 year old farmer's son is disrespectful to Mother

Posted on 12/31/2018

My son, who turned 14 in November, has become very disrespectful to his mother. We live on a farm and the place is not clean to his liking. He thinks his mother is lazy, won't pick up after...

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children not listening

Posted on 12/23/2018

Hello. A tiny bit about us: I had 5 children in 4.5 years: 3 girls then twin boys, now 6, 4.5, 3, & 18 mos (x2). I stay at home and do not work. The 6 yr old is in Kinder and other two girls...

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Discipline Drama

Posted on 12/13/2018

I have a 2.5 (boy) and 3.5 (girl) year old, and my girl constantly is taking things from her brother. He doesn’t tend to fight back much. I’m wondering when I can expect my daughter to stop...

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To Share or Not To Share

Posted on 11/23/2018

I have two daughters. Ages 34 months and 4. I am seeing a trend with my four year old not wanting to play independently. She tries to take over whatever the youngest is playing with and wants the...

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4 year old annoying big sister and more

Posted on 11/2/2018

HI there, What do you suggest I do with a 4 year old boy who is constantly annoying his 7-year old sister by making lots of noise when she's practicing the piano (it's in the living room and a...

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4 yo Kicking the Door in Timeout

Posted on 10/22/2018

I am having some behavioral issues with my very strong willed four year old daughter. She has become very sassy and disrespectful - sticking her tongue out at me, refusing to following...

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Clash of the "Tot"ans

Posted on 10/17/2018

I have a two year old and four year old who are constantly bickering! I have limited toys to one bin a piece. They start imaginary play with each other which is great but that turns into she...

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Sibling Rivalry or Sibling Abuse?

Posted on 10/4/2018

Hello! We have two daughters (3.5 years and 14 months). Lately we have seen increased incidents where the youngest bites or hits the oldest or the oldest pushes the youngest away (our oldest...

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Getting a 4 and 6 yr old help get ready for school bus

Posted on 9/24/2018

This year my 4 year old has joined my 6 year old in the morning school routine, as she is in 4K and the other in 1st grade. They take the bus to school together and they have a list of things to...

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4 yro not listening

Posted on 9/11/2018

Good afternoon. I am still struggling with my 4 year old son. He has a lot of trouble listening to directions, no matter what consequences have been put in place. We've taken away privileges, put...

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4 yro hurting 1 yro brother

Posted on 9/8/2018

I have a 4 year old girl and 1 year old boy. The older child has hurt her little brother, and meant it. She pushed his head down onto his tray, and she pulled his foot out from under him, for...

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taking back authority over 7yo

Posted on 8/12/2018

I recently discovered Mr. Rosemond's books. My husband and I are now implementing his ideas with our 7 year old son who gets easily frustrated when he doesn't get his way, ignores our demands,...

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Toddler Trouble

Posted on 8/1/2018

My 3 yr old is showing aggression towards my 1yr old. Pushing, eye poking....hurting in the face

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When does a parent need to intervene with siblings?

Posted on 8/1/2018

I regularly read your newsletter and have read several of your books. I've heard you discuss the importance of kids being responsible for keeping the family peace and using a ticket type system to...

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Sibling conflict and ticket system

Posted on 6/29/2018

My 3yo daughter and 5yo son fight almost constantly. (We also have a 2 month old baby girl.) We started the ticket system a week ago and we are doing 5 tickets per day - one set for both of them,...

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