Questions

Potty Training Isn’t the Same for Each Child

Posted on 10/25/2020

I began potty training my second son 6 days ago. He is so different than my first! Help! He doesn't seem too concerned about messes. He simply says "Uh-oh" and keeps on playing. When I say "Go sit...

Sassy 2 year old

Posted on 10/25/2020

28 month year-old son uses nasty tone and says “don’t say that to me!“ Or “don’t talk to me like that!“ ‘No!!’. I know this is part of being a toddler but if I engage back and let him know it is...

Adjusting to a New Pre School Can Be Hard

Posted on 9/25/2020

We are struggling with our 3-year-old at school. She started in PK-3 this year at a new school. The past 3 years she has been in daycare/pre-school. Where to begin... and by the way all of these...

3D Snapshot of the Mien of a Tween: not a Pretty Picture

Posted on 9/23/2020

My 12 year old son is stealing money out of my purse. He has a long history of defiance, sneakiness, and lying. He is also disrespectful, and disobedient. We suspect he's been stealing money for...

A Fine Whine?

Posted on 9/20/2020

Looking for help for whining for our 28mo. We have tried saying "that's whining. We can't hear whining. Use your happy voice." and even the raising eyebrows suggestion, for the last 7 or so...

Disrespectful 8-Year-Old

Posted on 9/19/2020

We have noticed more ungrateful and entitled behavior in my 8 year old son recently. During a trip to the zoo, he became upset and was rude and disrespectful when I would not buy him food and ice...

Welcome to the Terrible Twos!

Posted on 8/30/2020

When I get ready in the morning I let my 21 month old play with cotton balls and bandaids and other non harmful bathroom supplies. When I was done I told him to pick up the the cotton balls (he...

Wean him off the addiction of attention

Posted on 7/25/2020

My three year old hates being by himself. He seems to be a very social kid and would much rather talk to or play with someone than alone. That being said, his younger brother is too young to play...

3-yo boy "can't" manage to put away his toys

Posted on 7/23/2020

My son routinely says "I can't" when asked to pick up his toys or clean up a mess he made and he will do everything possible to get out of doing his part! He is very stubborn and timeout, taking...

Parents Need to Be On The Same Page

Posted on 7/23/2020

What if both parents in the home are not on the same page, can bad behavior be corrected?

What to Do About Screen Addiction?

Posted on 7/5/2020

My 11-year-old son is obsessed with screens. If we tell him to do something while he is on his phone or iPad he huffs and puffs or we are told, “in a minute." Then he only gets 2 out of 3 chores...

The Doctor Gets The Wiggles Out

Posted on 6/15/2020

Please can you give me some helpful pointers on how to deal with the issue of my 8 year son not sitting still for some activities. He's a nice, sensitive boy but I can't seem to understand why...

6 YO Girl Behaving Inappropriately with Friends and Lying About It

Posted on 6/2/2020

Private parts My 6 year old daughter and her friend, a boy have gotten in to trouble lately, because they keep trying to sneak off and pee in front of each other. I’m concerned because they...

Parenting Material is for Parents, Not Kids.

Posted on 6/1/2020

Is it ok to go through your material with our 12 year old son listening? It seems like he would understand better this way?

Complaining 6 year old

Posted on 5/27/2020

Hi, I have a 6 y.o. girl. She has days when she is happy with things, but most of the time she shows a negative attitude. Overall she is a good child. However, no matter what we do or don’t do...

Disrespectful Tween

Posted on 5/22/2020

My 11 year old daughter gets upset when I correct her and calls me names in her heart not aloud; but she later tells me those rude things and apologises. (The most recent name she called me...

Conquering a Three-Year Old Quarantine Quagmire

Posted on 5/5/2020

my son is 3 yr and 3 month old,he was very careful and neat. recently he started to get very aggressive especially during the quarantine in the house. He has been staying home for a month now. He...

Naps are just what the doctor ordered

Posted on 4/14/2020

My child talks non stop all day and is always asking questions. I can also barely get to the end of 2 sentences of a book without him interrupting and asking a question. I don’t want to crush his...

Hands Off!

Posted on 3/29/2020

My 7 year is always making stupid annoying loud noises and shouting and he keeps doing this in his 8 month old sisters face. He also constantly grabs her hands and smothers her. They seem to get...

Co-Parenting precautions continued

Posted on 3/29/2020

My 7 year old son has picked up on some terrible slang while with his father. Everything is “banging mate” as one example. It sounds horrendous. How do I stop this?

Children, Vitamins and The Doctor

Posted on 3/11/2020

Any tips on getting 12 and 8 year olds to take supplements? We’ve tried everything to mask the taste but it seems more of a power struggle. Thanks!

Give the Kid a Choice

Posted on 3/3/2020

We have a 35 month old son who is very loving, yet VERY strong-willed. I have read your book, and we have tried to implement the strategies recommended, but we find he is so defiant we would be...

Spiraling Seven Year Old

Posted on 3/2/2020

I would like some advice on how to handle our 7 year old son. Our family has had an extremely tough season. We had to re-home the dog my children grew up with (my sons best buddy) due to my sons...

Teaching 3 year old to listen the first time.

Posted on 2/9/2020

Is the targeted behavior (for the ticket system) “Refusing to do what we tell you to do” too general for 3.25 year old twins? We want to stomp out their habit of giving us push back/delaying/...

10 Year Old Testing Boundaries

Posted on 2/8/2020

I have been using the alpha speech. I make mistakes sometimes, escalating my voice because I'm frustrated. On the most part I'm pretty consistent. I noticed in alpha speech you do no use...

Time for a Reset

Posted on 1/12/2020

Clarification to my follow up question: When you say impose consequences... often my consequences are extra chores. I do not know what else to offer as a consequence. They're too young to take...

6 and 9 Year Olds Won’t Do Chores

Posted on 1/12/2020

Follow up question: After reviewing chapter 3, i do believe I was using the ticket system properly... my targets were 1. Not doing as told 2. Lying 3. Talking back. The targets were the same...

Alpha Speech is Key for Getting Kids to Obey

Posted on 1/10/2020

I have 2 girls, 9 & 6. They will not obey. They’ll lie that they did something and I have to verify completion or it’s never done. I used the ticket system and I had to take away every privilege...

Hold Me! Never Let Me Go!

Posted on 1/8/2020

My daughter (age 2) demands to be held an excessive amount. By "excessive amount", I mean hours in a row. The more holding I give her, the more she demands. She gets furious when put down before...

Potty Setback

Posted on 12/26/2019

My son, who is two and a half and well potty trained, has recently taken to pooping in his pants and/or on the floor. Timeouts do not seem to be effective. I tell him that "only babies poop in...

Mom needs to wake up

Posted on 11/25/2019

I’ve read the question “Resetting the dial” - while we don’t have a big family, we do want to start having some family rules e.g. Come when you are called, do not disturb the family peace, getting...

Ignoring Bad Habits

Posted on 11/25/2019

My 9-year-old daughter still puts things in her mouth and chews on them like a toddler: Lego pieces, wrappers, etc. It seems like she has an oral fixation and always needs to be chewing or sucking...

Managing Misbehavior on Vacation

Posted on 11/16/2019

After a long string of troubling incidents involving our 7yr old (soon to be 8) son, we decided to try John's "kicking out of the garden" strategy. We are going on vacation (gone 9 days) next...

Nip Physical Aggression in the Bud

Posted on 11/8/2019

We have been doing the ticket system with our four-year-old for the last four days. He has one targeting behavior, “refusing to listen,” and five tickets. Every day since we started, he has lost...

17 YO Boy's Odd Behavior

Posted on 11/5/2019

17 year old grandson has hidden lady’s purses under bed or in a drawer. They are empty and he gets them from family homes(ones no one uses). Happened about 4 times with fairly long lengths of...

Reforming a Licker

Posted on 11/5/2019

Our 7 year old boy has been licking things (like most of us would smell). We went to the fair last night and I watched him lick the handle bar of one of the rides. Today, I went outside to check...

Establishing Routines

Posted on 10/22/2019

Would you be able to give me a sample routine of what a day should look like for a family in my situation: I have twin toddlers (2 years old) with a speech delay. I'm a SAHM who is learning how...

"Curious Questions"

Posted on 10/5/2019

Hello, My boys are 9, 7, and 4. I understand they are curious but they are constantly asking questions and asking for things which feels overwhelming. When they ask for things, I usually give...

Odd Behavior is Normal

Posted on 9/22/2019

Hi there, our son just turned 4 in August. Recently, when we scold him, he begins to slap himself. He does this in public too. Is there anything we can do about this? Thank you!

How to Discipline at Home for Misbehavior at School

Posted on 9/16/2019

Hello, our 4-year-old scratched another student at school today because he wouldn’t be his friend. How do we discipline at home for school misbehavior? Thank you!

3 y/o Drama Queen

Posted on 9/5/2019

Every time we have to say goodbye to my 3 year old's friend, she cries like it's the end of the world and has a fit... We go on nightly walks with them and I have stopped because I do not want to...

7 yro needs a check up from the good old Dr.

Posted on 8/26/2019

I am starting my 3rd year of homeschooling my son who is now a 7 year old 2nd grader. And this year I’ve added my 5 year old kindergartener. I have struggled with the 7 year old obeying me...

Conversation interrupters.

Posted on 8/18/2019

We have many friends' and relatives' children who have interrupted our conversations with their parents to talk to us (our child isn't that age yet, but will definitely be taught not to!). My...

Wild Child

Posted on 8/17/2019

We recently started he ticket system with our 3 and 5 year old children. It has worked well with our 5 year old but our three year old has lost all his tickets multiple times. Often, the loss of...

When only one child misbehaves should the other kids have to miss out?

Posted on 7/24/2019

We live in an apartment. During the working days I am at work all day long. We have three girls: 6-year old, 4-year old and 3-month old baby. The two older kids have been adopted three years ago...

22 month old hates bath time

Posted on 7/18/2019

I've always had difficulty getting my daughter (now 22 months old) to sit down in the bathtub, but I could at least get her clean. She hates having water on her face, particularly her eyes, which...

How to get 4 and 5 yo brothers to play outdoors

Posted on 6/26/2019

How do I get my boys to play outside? We are locked in a power struggle at the moment over this. They never watch TV or videos. They get rambunctious playing inside the house all the time and I...

15 yo Daughter and Foolish Friends

Posted on 6/15/2019

15 year old daughter has been vaping, possible drinking & lying. She has put inappropriate photos referencing vaping, getting high and raiding our liquor cabinet on her Instagram only seen by...

4 and 5 year old brothers tag team Mom

Posted on 6/12/2019

My older boy, age 5 has been on the ticket system for about 9 months. He starts the day with 3 tickets and his misbehaviors are screaming at us and not obeying us. My younger boy, 4 has recently...

Discipline is not Always Convenient

Posted on 6/6/2019

When our son hits, we send him to his room for the entire day. However, his hitting tends to happen towards dinner/bedtime so we sentence him to his room the next day. Inevitably, it falls on a...

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