Questions

Shy 7 Year Old

Posted on 12/31/2021

My 7 year old first-grader has trouble joining into social situations. He plays well with his 5 year old brother, but with peers, he goes off on his own, and will tell stories to himself (I...

Finding Herself

Posted on 12/15/2021

Second question... We have 2 foster kiddos we're adopting. I have an 11 year old foster daughter who is really an amazing, respectful and happy girl. She really struggles with figuring out who...

Fear of the New

Posted on 12/15/2021

Our Foster son (8 years old) who we will be adopting in the next 6 months (working on paperwork and all the legal stuff that goes with it) has a very low self esteem and melts down and has a full...

Reading in the Morning or Reading in the Evening? Raising a Reader with Learning Challenges

Posted on 11/18/2021

I am homeschool my 7 year old child/grandchild. His Mother was diagnosed at age 7 with dyslexia and an auditory processing disorder by Dr Lucia Karnes which made me confident the assessment was...

Nine Year Old Drama

Posted on 5/22/2021

I'm worried about my daughter who's 9 years old. She is overly concerned with what people think of her. She gets easily embarrassed and is highly sensitive. I feel like she feels everyone doesn't...

Coaching Kids Through Frustrations

Posted on 4/23/2021

My 11-year-old boy has Aspergers . He gets frustrated easily. What should I do?

To Retain or Not to Retain

Posted on 4/16/2021

My daughter is in 3rd grade at a Christian private school. She has struggled since kindergarten to keep up, but we helped her along, with tutoring and occupational therapy to help her with the...

Emotional Intelligence Begins With Good Manners

Posted on 6/14/2020

Are you familiar with the term 2e kids? Or twice exceptional? Our 10 year old son appears to fall into this category. He is at above average intelligence, but his emotional iq is lacking and a...

Talking to Kids About Dyslexia

Posted on 6/11/2020

My son has a moderate case of dyslexia, and he is 10. Our daughter, who is 7, has a mild case of dyslexia. Our son, of course, knows he is dyslexic, however, we have not told our daughter she is...

10 yo struggles with low self-esteem & social anxiety

Posted on 3/22/2020

My 10 year old is dyslexic, and struggles with low self-esteem and social anxiety. How do I help him with his social anxiety? How do I help him with is low self esteem. Is there a book or two...

Focus More on the Behavior than the Diagnosis

Posted on 11/6/2019

I have a 10 year old son who was once diagnosed as autistic. A few years later we had him tested again in which the doctor couldn't understand why he was labeled that way and said he was not...

Negative thoughts about self at twelve.

Posted on 6/24/2019

My twelve year old daughter is currently doing a Bible study. She was asked to list 5 things she believed about herself. She listed all negative things. "I'm ugly, I'm dumb, I'm an...

Beating the Bullies

Posted on 6/20/2019

Here’s a topic I’ve been struggling with that I just saw John address in a Facebook post – mean kids. My oldest son (9) was complaining about some kids at his summer camp saying things like...

13yo struggles

Posted on 5/29/2019

My son is 13. He will be starting 8th grade this year. He got 5 detentions and two phone calls to the school from other parents saying he was bothering their kids. The detentions were for...

How much is enough?

Posted on 3/8/2019

I am wondering what you would say would normally expect to be included for a schedule for a 3 year old staying at home. I have my older 2 in school for parts of the day, and I have my younger...

6 yo Don't Fall for the Drama

Posted on 6/28/2018

When my 6yr old son gets really upset with himself, he has started saying “I hate myself and I wish I was never born.” My son is the middle child of four who is always in trouble. We use the...

Tummy Issues

Posted on 6/3/2018

Hello, I'm looking for advice on what to say to my daughter when she she asks me if she's fat. She is 8, and not fat at all. She is tall for her age and has a healthy athletic body as she...

Addressing Self Esteem

Posted on 4/4/2018

It seems lately I'm constantly trying to undo the last 10 years worth of damage that I've created. I take full responsibility for that but the question is always how. My daughters 12 and 9 have...

5 yro needs too much attention in school

Posted on 2/19/2018

I have a 5 year old son who began kindergarten this fall. His teacher has reported several times that he requires a lot of one on one guidance to complete tasks in the classroom. She has also...

Letting toddlers play alone?

Posted on 12/23/2017

My daughter is 2 years old and recently I noticed that she doesn't play on her own very much anymore and is often looking for me and my wife to entertain her. I set up her room with a few things...

Calm Down Please!

Posted on 9/12/2017

My daughter is now 8 1/2 - through the years I have written to you about her personality - last year she was diagnosed with Dyslexia - which has explained where the low self esteem has come from....

Never argue with a 5 year old.

Posted on 7/16/2017

My one and only gives the vibe she is superior to her classmates by contradicting them, telling them they are wrong or having show off behaviour. I'm afraid she will not have any friends, but am...

Pre-Teen's New Found Rigidity

Posted on 5/1/2017

My 11-year-old boy will some days be extremely legalistic. This morning he said he needed to read the Bible for 13 million hours, look up a YouTube video to know how to make his bed perfectly, not...

What's a School Counselor to Do?

Posted on 3/13/2017

Hi John, I'm a K-12 School Counselor and schools today have many challenges. One of them involves working with kids in junior high and high school who are failing, school is not working for...

Working on self esteem.

Posted on 9/15/2016

Our five year old daughter seems to have a case of high self-esteem. She constantly does things just to seek our attention (She was the 4 year old in need of potty training. Thank you for your...

Four year old cannot play by himself

Posted on 4/27/2015

Our 4.5 year old son is incapable of playing by himself. He either bothers his brother or lays on the floor and whines for me to play with him. I limit tv to one hour a day and we do not have...

9 year old Emotional Roller Coaster

Posted on 4/20/2015

My daughter is 9 years old and she is overly emotional. She cries over pretty much anything. Her teacher has written me on several occasions that I need to teach her how to handle herself. While I...

Teen has no empathy

Posted on 4/12/2015

Our teen is quick to criticize other's reactions instead of just taking care of the matter at hand. Here is a prime example: she accidentally knocks an item off the shelf. I let out a gasp with...

16 yo girl seeing a therapist

Posted on 11/29/2014

Our 16 year old daughter has tried to take her life twice. She does not talk to us regarding any problems and never has. She has always felt as though she does not want to bother or worry us and...

8 year old Standing Up for Himself

Posted on 8/28/2014

This is a question about our 8.5 year old boy. I have read you recognize 'boy behavior'-boys not keeping their hands to themselves,etc. and that it is normal. My boys experience this at Sunday...

5 yo Self-Esteem

Posted on 7/28/2014

My 5 year old son seems to be going through a rough time the last couple of months. Always a very sweet and mostly happy toddler, he has suddenly become negative and whiny about everything,...

Teens monthly allowance

Posted on 7/6/2014

My husband and I are reading Teen Proofing. On the subject of "cash", $100 was identified as a suggestion for monthly allowance and that amount would remain the same for the teen years. Since...

8 yr old negative about self

Posted on 5/17/2014

Our 8 year old does negative self-talk when we take a ticket or point out a misbehaviour,etc. For example, if I point out that he was talking back (one of his target behaviours) he will get an...

12 YO with ADHD, Tics, Hair Pulling, Low Self-Esteem

Posted on 5/7/2014

My son is 12, he has been on about every ADHD med in the past 6 years. The non-stimulant med would only "help" his behavior/focus for a short time (couple months) before the inattentive and...

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