Questions

How to effectively delay consequences for 5,6 yros

Posted on 7/7/2018

I’m struggling to understand how to enact delayed consequences as described in The “Nipping” Principle and could use some suggestions. It’s easy enough to do while on errands as both my 5 and...

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Figuring things out isn't easy.

Posted on 7/6/2018

I have been married for more than 25 years. My husband came with a daughter from his first marriage and we have two of our own. He is very permissive-extremely guilt ridden and operates from the...

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17 yo Girl Can't "Roll" With 23 yo

Posted on 6/28/2018

I have just recently discovered that my 17 daughter has been in a secret relationship with a 23 year old man who is an abuser of Methamphetamines. She has never used drugs (to my knowledge) nor...

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15yro defiant, angry,

Posted on 6/19/2018

I have a 15 year old son who has extreme fits of rage when he doesn’t get his way, which is entitlement. When he is in a rage he throws and breaks my things, curses me violently and threatens...

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6yro pouts

Posted on 6/18/2018

My 6 year old son is generally well-behaved. He does have one behavior that I‘m at a lost to correct. He pouts when he is disciplined – by pouting I mean the skin around his eyes turns red, he...

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The Terrible Three's

Posted on 6/15/2018

My 33 month old has recently begun yelling all of his responses. He gets frustrated very easily and says, “Stop! Stop it, mommy!” and “Goooosh!” "No!" is his favorite word, and now he yells it....

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3 yro crying uncontrollably

Posted on 5/3/2018

My 3 year old daughter sometimes cries so hard and long that she stops breathing for a few seconds. She usually does it when she is having a little tantrum, but it has also happened after hurting...

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7 yro needs to know who to listen to

Posted on 4/27/2018

Hi - we have a 9 year old boy who has special needs and 7 year old boy/girl twins. The boys get along well but our daughter is very jealous of her brothers. The main issue is she can be very mean,...

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Living at home or on campus for rebellious teen?

Posted on 4/12/2018

Our eldest is my step-daughter and she is graduating high school in May, and beginning a university program in town in summer. She has planned to live on campus, but is now feeling anxious and...

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Teen Resists Mom's Parenting; Chooses to Live with Dad

Posted on 4/6/2018

I have a 13 year old who lives primarily with me (mom and stepdad and half siblings.) She visits with her dad, stepmom, and other half siblings every other weekend. For the past several years, she...

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Power struggle with a teen.

Posted on 4/1/2018

Hello my 13 year old daughter pierced her ears at home after I told her I thought she was too young to have a second piercing. I have stripped her of all electronics and taken away her jewelry. I...

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WWJR do?

Posted on 3/17/2018

My son is a junior in college and lives on campus which is about 40 minutes from our home. He gets good grades and has worked a part-time job the last couple of years. Up until recently he was...

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8 Year Old Too "Curious"

Posted on 3/13/2018

When my son was 5, he tried to search for "girls pee pee" and other related terms on his tablet, which luckily was on the child setting. We talked to him the best we could even though he denied it...

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Sass in the Second Stage

Posted on 3/12/2018

Hello, I'm confused about why in the second stage of parenting, ages 10 to 13, it appears that if a child yells at their parents or is disrespectful, there is an immediate consequence. For...

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4yro anxiety/disobedience

Posted on 3/8/2018

Hello again I had just written to you last week about my sons anxiety. Well ever since this constant anxiety he’s been having and we have been doing what you said and I️t has helped. However he...

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An 11-year old Queen?

Posted on 2/21/2018

I home school our 11 year old daughter. She refuses to do any work if she does not feel like it. I will send her to her room and she will not go. I inform her that there will be a consequence if...

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Teens and Supplements

Posted on 2/15/2018

I am really enjoying John's book, Teen Proofing! Thanks, John! We have a brand new 12-year-old boy who has switched over from being kind, thoughtful, and sweet to being disrespectful,...

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Drugs

Posted on 2/8/2018

My 16 year old has some very straight friends and some that are experimenting with drugs. I am suspicious all the time and have drug tested him which he has passed. The party house is across the...

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Daughter choosing Dad

Posted on 1/13/2018

Now my daughter is with her biological father who rented an extended stay for himself and her close to school, so she can finish school now. It's her last year and she needs to start applying for...

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Parental Rights and Decisions

Posted on 1/8/2018

I had a big fight with my daughter, she snapped and started hitting me. My husband, who's her stepdad, was trying to stop her by grabbing her hands and pulling her away. I called the police...

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Pre-Schooler Stuck in Season 1

Posted on 1/1/2018

Hi there, i have a little 3.5 year old who is completely out of control. I admit we have let him run the house a little bit as he is a little spitfire and makes things unpleasant(ie screams as...

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3 yr old's behavior gets worse

Posted on 12/14/2017

So we've been doing this, sending him to bed early every night, and it almost seems like that's making it worse? The teacher is reporting more dirt eating than usual and he gets in the car after...

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5yr old mad at the world

Posted on 11/18/2017

My beautiful 5.5 year old son is mad at the world. Disobedient, disrespectful, down right mean. I have been reading John's books and tried the tickets for two years. Asked several questions....

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3 year old and Ticket System

Posted on 11/14/2017

I have a 3 year old son who has been on the ticket system for 6 weeks, and I feel extremely discouraged. Today during his check-up at the doctors office he refused to let the nurse weigh him or...

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15 yo boy "running off"

Posted on 11/13/2017

I have a fifteen year old son who likes to run off for hours at a time with no notice as to where he is going when he gets in trouble or mad. Unfortunately, my wife and I struggle with "should we...

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The Phone is Not the Problem

Posted on 10/4/2017

So, in response to the answer to my question I have a few other questions. In the past few days a lot has transpired and my husband and I really had it out over my son. I understand a lot of his...

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Lower the Boom on 18 year old son

Posted on 10/1/2017

My son has just turned 18 and is a senior in high school. He had his first job this summer doing construction work with some people we know. He did well getting up early and they said that he...

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11 yr old lost all her blocks on chart!!!

Posted on 10/1/2017

My wife and I have an 11 year old and 9 year old daughter. We kicked our 9 year old out of the garden several weeks ago for school and home behavior issues. Our 11 year was put on weekly charts...

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6-Block Chart Program

Posted on 9/29/2017

My son is 9 1/2. Over the last few months we have implemented the daily 6 block chart program after reading The Well Behaved Child in response to the defiance and attitude we had been seeing...

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3yr old out of control

Posted on 9/14/2017

My husband and I are struggling with finding the right disciplinary action for our 3 year old daughter. She has many meltdowns and tests our authority on a regular basis. We have found that taking...

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11 yr old Effort and Responsibility

Posted on 9/6/2017

I am the Dad of an 11 year old (6th grade). She is not giving good effort at school. My wife and I have told her it is her responsibility and she needs to get help from the teachers, study...

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AP Classes and Motivation

Posted on 8/31/2017

Hi! My son started high school a couple of weeks ago. He was placed in an advanced program where they start taking some AP classes in 9th grade. He has been against the program since we went to an...

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14 yr old peer pressure

Posted on 8/29/2017

My 14 year old daughter has an 'interesting' group of friends at her government school, who seem to be able to manipulate their parents. We are zoned for this school and cannot afford a private...

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Being consistent.

Posted on 8/21/2017

Our 9 year old daughter has a legion of home and school misbehaviors (primarilly tantrums/hitting at home and agression/defiance at school) that have been occuring for years. After reading "The...

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Almost 4yr old hitting mom and dad

Posted on 8/9/2017

My son is turning 4 in a couple of weeks and has recently started hitting his dad and I. We have been working on a 6-block chart for about 2 1/2 weeks mainly targeting disobeying and talking back....

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16 Year Old Daughter's Continued Rebellion

Posted on 8/6/2017

I wrote a few months ago about my daughter who I caught drinking. It turns out that it wasn't a blip on the radar with her. Given her behavior of late (defensive, sneaky), I tracked her location...

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Shoplifting teen blames Mom

Posted on 7/2/2017

I'm feeling guilty. In the last couple of months my son has been in trouble with the police,(for shoplifting) and at school. Home life has been very difficult. I have made him take responsibility,...

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3yr old Fits and Trouble Playing with Brother

Posted on 6/27/2017

My 3 year old is very big and strong for his age. When I have him go to his room for either timeout for a fit or for naptime he physically fights me now. He used to simply whimper and cry but then...

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A blip on her radar?

Posted on 6/4/2017

Hello- Last evening, I caught my 16 year old daughter who came home from a graduation party (with adults present) very intoxicated. She was throwing up in the bathroom w/ 2 girlfriends who were...

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3 1/2 yr old defiance

Posted on 5/30/2017

I have questions about two similar scenarios that are problems for my 3 and a half year old son. The first is that when he's around kids his own age for some sort of a program requiring group...

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Wild Monkey at Naptime

Posted on 5/1/2017

I try to make a regular one hour quiet time for my 3 year old daughter every afternoon but things usually end negatively. She has, from birth, been a high needs kiddo and playing by herself seems...

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Post divorce parenting struggles.

Posted on 4/21/2017

I have a son (14) and daughter (16) who I share custody (40%) with my ex wife (60%). We have been divorced 5 years. We live about a mile apart. Daughter has decided now that she’s 16, she doesn’t...

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Toddlers & the word "no"

Posted on 4/9/2017

My 18 month old daughter laughs whenever she is told "no" or not to do something. She usually goes into a fit of laughter and runs away giggling yelling "no! no!" Or she does something she knows...

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Single parent struggles.

Posted on 4/3/2017

I could probably be considered guilty of putting my kids in the center of the family. Giving too much consideration to their feelings... I'm a single parent of boy/girl twins that are 10 and...

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Reestablishing Relationships with Rebellious Young Adults

Posted on 3/21/2017

Unsuccessful in how I stated this a week ago, so trying once more. Have one of our ten children, adopted from Eastern Europe, who after many infractions, was thrown out of the house by my husband,...

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Disorganized parenting leads to...

Posted on 3/17/2017

I need help with my 15 year old daughter. I'm a single mom and I also have a 10 year old son. She has a boyfriend, and his parents are drunks and do not care where their son is or what he's...

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Troubled Young Teen?

Posted on 2/5/2017

This question is in reference to the October 2016 question regarding my 13 year old's act of vandalism. Fast forward 8 months later. He has completed his punishment, but not without having to...

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Immature Teen Has Cursing Problems

Posted on 1/18/2017

We have an immature 16-year-old with a potty mouth. This son of ours has mental delays as well. Strikes us as closer to 12 or so mentally. We have ten children, some adopted with handicaps. This...

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Out of control 5 and 3 y/o boys

Posted on 1/3/2017

Hello, I am doing a miserable job as a parent to my two boys (aged 5 and 3). They are out of hand entirely. We can't get through prayers at the dinner table without at least one of them being...

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