Questions

Adult children taking sides.

Posted on 6/1/2017

We have 2 adult kids, 23 & 19 and they are being brainwashed & siding with my ex regarding a very critical & legal matter regarding a business/financial agreement for my elderly father of 87. My...

19 yo Narcissist Revisited

Posted on 5/24/2017

We need more help in dealing with the daughter that I have asked questions about in the past. She is continuing her pattern of bitterness. She made no contact with me on a recent birthday and no...

Safety first.

Posted on 4/23/2017

On 4/19/17 I asked a question about my 18 year old step son saying he would hit me. I also said that my husband stated he would divorce me if I called the police on the boy if he does hit me. I...

Being responsible for adult children.

Posted on 4/20/2017

Our 19 year old son from my husband's first marriage returned home after his first college semester because he was having problems. We soon realized he had been on drugs. Our suspicion was...

Unresolved marital issues impact parenting.

Posted on 4/19/2017

My 18 year old step son caused a horrible scene at our family Easter gathering this weekend. His younger brother was in trouble for being rude and disrespectful to both his father and me. However...

Adult child's negative influence on minor siblings.

Posted on 3/29/2017

Dear John, What is your solution to this? We have an older, out of the house child (30 years old), who is sowing seeds of discontent with his younger siblings (teens) who still live at home. He...

Finances and the Bank of Mom and Dad

Posted on 3/28/2017

We have our first child in college. We are giving her a monthly stipend to pay for incidentals. Room, board and tuition are paid for both with money we saved and a scholarship she earned. She also...

Reestablishing Relationships with Rebellious Young Adults

Posted on 3/21/2017

Unsuccessful in how I stated this a week ago, so trying once more. Have one of our ten children, adopted from Eastern Europe, who after many infractions, was thrown out of the house by my husband,...

College student lessons.

Posted on 3/21/2017

Against our advice, our college student chose a roommate known to be prone to histrionics. Before the decision was made, we outlined all the potential ramifications but let her make the final...

Adult children continue to be parented.

Posted on 2/22/2017

Do you have any advise on how to recconect with an estranged adult child who is in their 30's? And yes, I made all the "giving your child self-esteem" mistakes in the 1980-2000 that you speak...

What to Do When Older Sister Is Mean to Younger Sister

Posted on 2/5/2017

Our older daughter continues to be a source of hurt to her younger sister. They are three years apart and both teens. They are both well liked in the community, praised by teachers, active in...

Can you change your adult child's destructive behavior?

Posted on 1/23/2017

What is the order of priority to hold adult children (21 age) accountable to who live at home while attending college? We have a 21 year old daughter who was kicked out of college for drugs. ...

19 yo Telling Parents Off

Posted on 12/20/2016

Same daughter - More issues. This is related to the daughter that I have asked about in previous posts. She continues to be distant in her relationship. She will never return a "I love you" and...

Parenting the Terminally Ill

Posted on 12/8/2016

Do parenting rules change when parenting a young adult (19) with a chronic/terminal illness. My husband's son (and 16 yr old daughter) have cystic fibrosis. While their health is generally good...

Parenting Adult Children

Posted on 12/5/2016

I am the parent of a new, 18-year-old adult, the oldest of my 4 children. What are your thoughts on parents giving children unsolicited advice and unsolicited help? At what age of the child...

Parenting Adult Children, Follow Up

Posted on 12/1/2016

To follow up on my last question (Parenting Adult Children). When my son admitted he started smoking cigarettes about 2 months ago and says he does not do it very often, my husband told him he...

Parenting adult children.

Posted on 11/28/2016

My son is 19 and a sophomore in college. His school is 45 minutes away from our home and he lives on campus. We pay for his college and housing. When he comes home occasionally on the weekend we...

Problems with live-in adult stepdaughter

Posted on 11/26/2016

My stepdaughter, Mary, and her 7 1/2 year old granddaughter, Ann, moved in with us in NY since her husband is an alcoholic and in rehab in CA. She finally landed a good job here in her...

Too Late

Posted on 10/5/2016

Our daughter recently graduated from college and did well and has a good paying job. She lives with us ( 1.5 months now) but is actively looking for her own place closer to work. She has never...

Paying for College?

Posted on 9/4/2016

After graduating from high school we could tell our son was not really ready for college. When looking and applying for schools it was all about the location (New York, Chigaco etc and finding...

Pot-Smoking 19 Year Old Unemployed and Living at Home

Posted on 8/17/2016

My 19 year old son lives at home, smokes pot, is currently unemployed. He struggled all through school- we didn't know until the last week of school whether he was graduating or not (I don't think...

21 year old moves back home

Posted on 7/20/2016

My daughter Larisa was born almost 21 years ago. Her father just disappeared when he found out I was pregnant. I wanted to abort her but by Gods grace he spoke to my heart and changed my mind. I...

18-Year-Old Being Inconsiderate

Posted on 6/22/2016

Should we expect any structure in the home when our 18-year-old returns weekends from a summer job? She usually heads straight to her boyfriend's family home and rolls in around 3 a.m. both...

Dad Rewards Freshman College Student

Posted on 6/7/2016

Our son just finished his first year of college and earned a 3.8 GPA. My husband and I pay for all his college expenses and he lives at home with us year round. He works a part time job on the...

19 yo Narcissist

Posted on 5/22/2016

More drama with our daughter - Followup I thought they maybe we were making some headway until tonight. We met as a family for ice cream and she expressed her concern about some choices that...

18 Year Old Bank Account

Posted on 3/19/2016

Our 18 (soon to be 19) year old son lives at home with us, attends university full time and earns stellar grades has a part time job and a few friends but spends most of his free time at home. We...

17 and won't take responsibility

Posted on 1/21/2016

My almost 17 year old son is a Junior in high school. We need help parenting him. And I feel the hourglass is quickly running out--he's supposedly 18 months from graduation/launching into...

Mom wants teens to reach out to grandparents

Posted on 1/6/2016

Once in awhile I will ask my teen daughters to write a short note or give a call to their grandparents or aunt. Usually the letters are when they are thanking them for gifts and otherwise, they...

19 Year Old Home for the Holidays, follow up

Posted on 1/3/2016

Okay - I took your advice because I feel like it was good advice. However, it didn't end with "sunshine and roses". When I asked about what I could do to make things right, she said that it was a...

19 Year Old Home For the Holidays

Posted on 12/22/2015

This is another question concerning our daughter (just turned 19). She is home for the holidays as she continues to attend a Bible College. She has seemed to continue to be "distant" - not coming...

How do I help my college kid manage spending money?

Posted on 12/21/2015

As we prepare to have our first child enter college, do you have any advice on how to handle her discretionary spending money? Assuming room and board are paid for, we were thinking about putting...

Advice for Mom of 20-year-old

Posted on 11/29/2015

We have a son that is a 20-year-old middle child. He will graduate college in May. He is a very smart young man, has a wonderful work ethic, pays for many of his college expenses, gifted in the...

Underage Drinking by College Daughter

Posted on 10/17/2015

Dear Parent Guru, It's been a year since I have written! I dug up my favorite book Power of the Praying Parent by Stormie O'Martin and praying has calmed me having a daughter in her 2nd year...

College Responsibilities

Posted on 7/10/2015

My 19 year old son is home for the summer after his freshman year of college. His first year seemed promising with lots of dreams. He did not join the party scene and managed the major change in...

Adult Child Living at Home

Posted on 7/6/2015

Hi ParentGuru team, I am back again! John (or whoever), I have a few questions for you: 1) What is your advice for allowing adult children (age 22 in my case) to live with you temporarily (or not...

House Rules for Adult Children?

Posted on 6/29/2015

Our 20-year old son is returning home from College for his summer break. We know that you advise that we respect that he is an adult and therefore not put the same restrictions on him that we did...

18 year old Home for the Summer

Posted on 5/15/2015

This is a follow-up to a question regarding my 18 year old daughter. She has finished her first year of college. It has been a good year for her, but she still seems to be very distant in her...

22 yr old video game addiction

Posted on 5/13/2015

My 22 year old son games all the time. What do you say or do with this age of kid to help him end his addiction? His life is falling away from him.

Teen has no empathy

Posted on 4/12/2015

Our teen is quick to criticize other's reactions instead of just taking care of the matter at hand. Here is a prime example: she accidentally knocks an item off the shelf. I let out a gasp with...

18 Year Old Emancipation

Posted on 1/18/2015

Our daughter moved to a different city at 18 to be a member of a ballet company. This venture was completely at our expense. After a year she decided she wanted to go to school full time, but...

18 Year Old Fails First College Semester

Posted on 1/7/2015

18 yr old twin daughter affected by her wayward twin sister-as in my last posts one twin daughter ran off living in sin with boyfriend & being financially supported by who knows who-heard she's...

19 year old Home From College

Posted on 12/16/2014

My 19 year old daughter is home from her freshman year of college. The school is 4 hours away, and she has been living in the dorms and has been as you know unsupervised! Her grades are excellent,...

18 Year Old Visit after Boot Camp

Posted on 11/11/2014

What is the best way to communicate "visiting the home" rules to a young adult who fought every rule when he lived here? Dad feels that it should just be a direct "Here are the rules for adults...

Wayward College Kid

Posted on 10/27/2014

Our 19yo daughter is sophomore in college at an expensive school in a very distant state. We pay all expenses, as well as rent, cell phone, utilities. She has a small loan. She was awarded an...

College Freshman's 1st visit home

Posted on 10/13/2014

Dear Parent Guru, My 18 year old daughter will be coming home for fall break with 5 friends.. What are reasonable expectations we should have? What would you tell your daughter before she...

18 year old Family Chaos

Posted on 9/25/2014

(see Previous posts)As you know my twin 18yr daughter went off to live w boyfriend on 8/10/14 I do NOT support that (I completely cut her off financially).she was raised in Christian home..my...

19 year old With Tattoos

Posted on 9/22/2014

Our 19 year old daughter has now gotten her third tattoo, we made it very clear how we felt about them. I wished my husband and I could have been on the same page in regards to laying down the law...

College Student Isn't Calling

Posted on 8/23/2014

Dear Parent Guru, My oldest daughter is now in college. Monday before she were leaving she ruptured her appendix and bounced back pretty fast. We left that same Friday and helped her set up her...

21 year old lacks responsibility

Posted on 6/13/2014

I am extremely frustrated with my 21 year old son that is living at home and will be getting married in 7 months. In many ways, he has been and continues to be a good kid. However, he has been and...

19 year old not following parental values

Posted on 6/6/2014

Our 19 year old son has completed his first year of college and we have recently found he has been making lifestyle choices totally against what we have taught him. His phone life is where we...

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