"Don't ask a child a question if you don't mean for the child to have a choice in the matter. "


John's Most Recent Articles

Custody Issue: Teen Acts Aggressively Towards Mother

Posted on 1/12/2016

Q: My ex-husband and I have pretty much fifty-fifty custody of our 15-year-old son, who has become infected with his father’s disrespect for me. When he’s with me, he makes it very clear that he...

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Not All Outcomes Are Equal

Posted on 2/17/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Equality under the law is a uniquely American principle, one that no freedom-loving person would oppose, but the manner in which said principle is...

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3-Year-Old Girl Missing Dad

Posted on 8/2/2011

Tot's distress isn't about missing dad Q. My daughter will be 3 years old soon. Her father was primary caretaker until she was around 20 months, then he left and she hasn't seen him since. I...

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Son From a Previous Marriage

Posted on 10/26/2010

Who should tell son of half-brother? Q: My ex-husband and I aren't friendly. Ours was his second marriage. His first marriage produced a child, but when he and his first wife divorced, he...

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Boys Need Fathers, Not Friends

Posted on 11/17/2009

TODAY'S MALES NEED FATHERS, NOT FRIENDS I recently spent some time with a friend who has three children. My buddy is a college-educated responsible guy who has never failed to do right by his...

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13-Year-Old Girl Obsessed with Boys Needs Male Role Model

Posted on 10/27/2009

GIRLS NEED POSITIVE MALE ATTENTION IN LIVES Q. My 13-year- old daughter seems obsessed with boys. She will talk to a boy on the phone one time and then tell me that he's her new boyfriend....

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Mom Disciplines 15-Year-Old Daughter, But Ex Does Not Follow Through

Posted on 10/13/2009

MOM DISCIPLINES DAUGHTER, THEN DIVORCED DAD IGNORES IT Q. My 15-year-old daughter's grades have dropped this year, and I have taken away most of her privileges. But she spends a few nights a...

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6-Year-Old Boy Interest in War-Like Games

Posted on 10/28/2008

INTEREST IN WAR-LIKE GAMES NOT UNUSUAL FOR BOYS Q: My happy 6-year-old son has started incorporating death and war-like games into his play. He has never been a mean-spirited child, but his dad...

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13-Year-Old Girl Disappointed with Dad

Posted on 8/12/2008

DAUGHTER'S DISAPPOINTED WITH DAD Q. My 13-year-old daughter's father is irresponsible. He frequently cancels visits and is often obviously lying about the reasons. Nonetheless, I've told her...

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Teen Wants to Live with Dad

Posted on 10/10/2006

TEENAGER WANTS TO GO LIVE WITH DAD Q: I have joint custody of my son who has threatened that when he turns 14 he is going to go live with his father, who's been encouraging this. My husband and...

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Recent Questions

Post divorce parenting struggles.

Posted 1 week ago

I have a son (14) and daughter (16) who I share custody (40%) with my ex wife (60%). We have been divorced 5 years. We live about a mile apart. Daughter has decided now that she’s 16, she doesn’t...

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11 yo Father Wants 50/50 Custody

Posted on 10/5/2016

I really need an answer quickly. I am not the parent in this case..........my daughter is. She and her husband are divorced and have one 11 year old daughter. The custody arrangement settled on...

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4-yr-old struggling with divorce/custody situation

Posted on 8/1/2016

Our youngest son is going to be five in October. He splits his time between our house and his mother's house. Our households have totally different parenting styles, to say the least. All summer,...

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Not a "Real" Grandma?

Posted on 7/13/2016

My stepdaughter and my 7.5 year old granddaughter lived in another state and moved in with us 1 year ago . My granddaughter's father is an alcoholic, became physically abusive to her Mom and...

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Update on 4 Year Old Parents Divorcing

Posted on 4/15/2016

UPDATE for Sarah: Thanks for your last answer. It is incredibly helpful every single time you give me feedback. The update is that my son's dad and I have now physically separated. I'm very...

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No Game

Posted on 4/12/2016

Recently, 3 of my 4 children participated in a "game" with their 18-year-old soon-to-be step-brother. The "game" consisted of binding the hands of the children, 1-male (8) and 2-females (6 & 5),...

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18-Month-Old and Custody Issues

Posted on 3/11/2016

In an upcoming custody case, the father of my 18 month old is trying to get the baby for 7 consecutive weeks during the summer as well as other time sharing, after the father will move back to...

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4 Year Old Parents Divorcing

Posted on 1/30/2016

Hi... My husband and I are finally splitting up. I am planning on a divorce. Our son is now 4. Husband is generally pissed at the world all the time, and a Terrible role model. He can't see...

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17 yo Smoking Pot

Posted on 1/28/2016

17 year old son was caught smoking pot for the third time. Set down a set of consequences that frankly were not that tough but he doesn't want to live by. Went into a rage and left home. Now says...

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Joint Custody Issue

Posted on 1/25/2016

We have joint custody, one week with me, one week with mom. Mom insists that the girls ages 13 and 11 call her every night on my week. I don't mind, but the calls become a gossip session or 20...

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