"As children grow older, parents must give them greater freedom, including greater freedom to make mistakes. "

Disobedience/Defiance

John's Most Recent Articles

Medicine Doesn't Cure Misbehavior

Posted on 7/26/2016

Q: Our son is a rising second-grader at a private school. Last year, his behavior was often disruptive and sometimes even downright defiant—problems his first grade teacher did not have with him....

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Custody Issue: Teen Acts Aggressively Towards Mother

Posted on 1/12/2016

Q: My ex-husband and I have pretty much fifty-fifty custody of our 15-year-old son, who has become infected with his father’s disrespect for me. When he’s with me, he makes it very clear that he...

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Use Proper Authority with Teens

Posted on 4/21/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: Our son is going to be 13 next year and we’re trying to be proactive about the coming storm. He’s been a good kid and relatively easy to raise to...

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Alarming Trends

Posted on 3/3/2015

Copyright 2015 John K. Rosemond In the 1960s, child and teen mental health and behavior problems began an alarming rise that has continued to the present. In 1970, one of my grad school...

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"The Doctor" Makes House Calls

Posted on 4/28/2014

Shortly after I finished graduate school, a friend of mine shared with me a book called Indirect Hypnosis, written by Milton Erickson, a most unorthodox psychiatrist if ever there was one....

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The "Hang in There Principle"

Posted on 11/26/2013

Q: My 11-year-old son cuts corners on everything. If he does a chore, he'll leave the cleaning products behind. If his bed his hard to make he hides the sheet in the closet and throws the blanket...

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Kicking Out of the Garden of Eden [Explained]

Posted on 10/6/2013

Kicking the child out of the Garden of Eden John's "Garden of Eden" statement: Other Q and A or articles about this method may be searched by using the keyword "Garden" Below is detailed...

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Discipline Problems

Posted on 10/1/2013

Most parents describe discipline problems as if they are "coming out" of their kids, that the problems in question reveal facets of their kids' personalities-things like "strong-willed."...

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Last Chance for Major Change

Posted on 2/5/2013

Q: Our 17-year-old is a highly spoiled underachiever. As a junior in high school, he's failing two classes and borderline in the rest. We know that his problems are largely due to our parenting...

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Nine year old Refuses to go to her room

Posted on 1/15/2013

Q: What should I do when my 9-year-old daughter loses all of her privileges because of her misbehavior but refuses to go to her room? I tried to physically force her, but she put up too much of a...

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Recent Questions

Teen Meltdown

Posted 4 days ago

I read on here to take a time out before engaging with a teen and making a decision. Then once giving your decision, being a 'robot' when responding. We have an intelligent, 6ft, almost 15 yr old...

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The doctor says...

Posted 1 week ago

Hello, I have a 6 (7 in May) year-old daughter who is the oldest girl of three. She's very bright, articulate, caring, giving...you get the drift. As she's gotten older, she has started to...

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4 y/o Bedtime Monster

Posted 1 week ago

Our 4 year old great-grandson has been living with us for almost 8 months. He is fairly good during the day (unless he has not had a nap). He goes to preschool 3 days a week. And went to the...

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12 yo Rage Out of Control

Posted 1 week ago

My 12 year old son has occasional anger issues and when he gets spun up (usually after I say no to him about something unreasonable) he gets into an extreme almost rage type anger. He has...

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Troubled Young Teen?

Posted 3 weeks ago

This question is in reference to the October 2016 question regarding my 13 year old's act of vandalism. Fast forward 8 months later. He has completed his punishment, but not without having to...

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Don't Ask, Do Tell!

Posted on 1/29/2017

I have a 13 year old who has always been defiant. She is bright, and a fantastic kid, but when she is asked to do something she doesn't wan, the fight is on. She will not do what I ask, or will...

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6 yo Won't Stay in His Room

Posted on 1/11/2017

We are having problems knowing how to deal with our 6yo foster son (1 of 4 foster children) who has tantrums (yelling, throwing things, kicking, defiant and sometimes laughing as he disobeys,...

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New shoes problems

Posted on 1/9/2017

One of our 9-year-old twins is very particular on how clothing items fit. I took her shoe shopping and she picked out two pairs of shoes: sneakers and church shoes (at the store I asked her to be...

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2 yo Driving Mom Nuts

Posted on 1/3/2017

My 2.5 year old has gone from defiant to extremely defiant in the last month or so. I seem not to be able to tackle or settle any problems, before another one and another one comes up! 1)...

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Out of control 5 and 3 y/o boys

Posted on 1/3/2017

Hello, I am doing a miserable job as a parent to my two boys (aged 5 and 3). They are out of hand entirely. We can't get through prayers at the dinner table without at least one of them being...

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