"To be an effective disciplinarian, you must be a model of self-discipline. "

School Age (6-10 years)

John's Most Recent Articles

Micromanaging Weakens Child's Success in School

Posted on 8/22/2017

Q: Our son attends first grade at the local public school. At the beginning of the school year, all the parents were basically told that we are expected to go to the school’s parent website every...

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Put a Lid on Materialistic Excess for Kid With Sticky Fingers

Posted on 7/19/2017

Q: We’ve just been informed that our 7-year-old son has been effectively “expelled” from the private school he attended last year because of repeated instances of stealing small items from...

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Do Your Homework Before Choosing a School

Posted on 5/30/2017

Q: We have just moved and are seeking a new school for our two children – 6- and 8-year-old boys. They are smart, respectful of adults, and creative. We know that sounds like typical bragging, but...

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Do Classroom Reward Systems Undermine Parental Authority?

Posted on 5/18/2017

<b>Q. My daughter's kindergarten teacher is using a reward system to manage classroom behavior. Children earn smiley faces for good behavior and can trade them in for prizes at the end of the...

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What to Do About a Poor Report Card

Posted on 1/24/2017

<i><b>How to transform bad grades into a learning experience -- and into better results.</b></i> When your child brings home disappointing grades, don't panic, and don't lose your cool. Studies...

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Comfort, Not Counseling, Is the Treatment for Nightmares

Posted on 12/21/2016

Q: Our 5-year-old has suddenly started waking up with nightmares. He's not able to describe them with any clarity, however, so we don't know what the content of them is. The most he's able to...

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Parent Help With Homework Is a Generally Bad Thing

Posted on 9/13/2016

Amanda Johnson, a second-grade teacher in Laramie, Wyoming, has caused quite a stir both among her colleagues and constituents and—because her educational incorrectness was covered by national...

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Selecting the Right Private School

Posted on 8/16/2016

Q: We are looking for a private school for our 4-year-old. Regardless of the school we ultimately choose, we want to keep him there through eighth grade at least. We live in an suburban area so...

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Medicine Doesn't Cure Misbehavior

Posted on 7/26/2016

Q: Our son is a rising second-grader at a private school. Last year, his behavior was often disruptive and sometimes even downright defiant—problems his first grade teacher did not have with him....

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Have a Game Plan for Daughter's Anxiety

Posted on 6/28/2016

Q: My 8-year-old daughter is having anxiety issues that seem to border on obsessive-compulsive disorder. She wants me to repeat certain things back to her and has a set routine of things I must...

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Recent Questions

Calm Down Please!

Posted 1 week ago

My daughter is now 8 1/2 - through the years I have written to you about her personality - last year she was diagnosed with Dyslexia - which has explained where the low self esteem has come from....

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Enough Talk?

Posted 2 weeks ago

Hello and Thank You for your help and guidance. We last asked a question in April. Here we are in September, back again and most appreciative. Our 7 year old was exposed to pornographic video on...

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What to Do About Screaming?

Posted 2 weeks ago

I have a 7 year old daughter who goes from 0-10 and screams loudly over tiny little things, and everyone rushes to her rescue (except us) when something happens. For instance, if she stubs her...

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Same problem, same directive.

Posted 3 weeks ago

How do I get my 6yo boy to stop the constant whining/crying when he doesn't get his way, gets frustrated, and fighting with his 2 sisters. Help.... It's driving me nuts!!

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Daily Report Cards Help School Behaviors

Posted 3 weeks ago

I have a 7 year old who has been having problems at school and just recently we received a form from school saying that the school is requesting for social worker intervention, that is "the next...

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Off to a rocky start at Kindergarten!

Posted 3 weeks ago

For the 3rd time in 8 days my 5 year old has come home from Kindergarten with a bad report from the teacher. She's at a Catholic school, which we are very happy with, but she just can't seem to...

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Pay Your Way

Posted 3 weeks ago

Hello, I've been asking questions for a few years now about my daughter. I've read John's book "The Well Behaved Child." My question regarding my now 7 year old daughter is this: How do I...

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Stop Feeding the Beast

Posted 3 weeks ago

HI there, We are currently disciplining our 6 year old daughter for not eating her lunch most days. The problem she claims is that they turn on the TV during lunch so she doesn't eat. She also...

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No More Lies

Posted 3 weeks ago

Hello Again, While I appreciate the quick reply to my last question, it didn't address the primary question in the post. The issue wasn't eating in the cafeteria. That was a result of the...

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Six year old girl needs to play!

Posted on 8/23/2017

I am having trouble balancing my 6 year old's responsibilities at home. She started school this year (prep) - the year before grade 1. She's at school from 8:30am - 3pm. By the time we arrive...

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