"The ultimate goal of raising children is to help them out of our lives and into successful lives of their own. "

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Shift in Paradigm Derailed Child-Rearing

Posted 2 days ago

I am sometimes asked if I think the “parenting pendulum” is swinging back, however slowly, toward where it was sixty-plus years ago or at least toward a tolerable middle point. ...

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Treat Kids Like They're No Big Deal

Posted 1 month ago

I am a member of the last generation of American children who were no big deal. No one made a big deal over me, ever. Not my mother, my father, or anyone else. For my parents, raising me properly...

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A Little 'Vitamin N' Can Go a Long Way

Posted on 7/12/2017

I call it “Vitamin N.” It is the word children need to hear most, but it is currently the word children hear least. It is arguably the most character-building word in the English language, but...

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America Needs a Parenting Retro-Revolution

Posted on 6/21/2017

I was honored to be a guest on my good friend Dennis Prager’s syndicated radio program the other day and as anyone who is familiar with my point-of-view on parenting matters will appreciate, much...

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Upside-Down, Inside-Out and Backwards Parent-View Disorder

Posted on 6/13/2017

Many of today’s parents suffer (and suffer they do, albeit a good number seem to feel their suffering is a sign of conscientious parenting) from what I call “upside-down, inside-out and backwards...

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An Open Letter to American Parents

Posted on 5/2/2017

Dear American Parent (hopefully, you will recognize yourself), It’s high time someone reminded you of the adage “The road to ‘Hades’ is paved with good intentions.” I...

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Kids Are Happiest When Obedient

Posted on 4/25/2017

Q: I’ve read enough of your writings to know that you believe children should be obedient, that they should do what they are told. I want my children to think for themselves and to question...

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Bring Back Vocational Education in High Schools

Posted on 4/11/2017

During my sophomore year at Proviso West High School in Hillside, Illinois, my guidance counselor, Mr. Gusloff, refused my request to take auto shop because I was, he said, college-bound and my...

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Vacationing With Kids

Posted on 3/30/2017

Here's a strange practice: Two adults, married to one another, work at difficult jobs for 50 weeks, thus earning a two-week vacation. To reward themselves for their efforts, they arrange to spend...

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The Fundamental Rules of Parenting

Posted on 3/28/2017

Q: You seem to blame all of America’s parenting woes on mental health professionals and imply that if parents still raised kids as did people in the 1950s and before, they wouldn’t be having the...

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Children Need Adults Who Are Worthy of Being Paid Attention

Posted on 3/21/2017

Once again, a reader proves that parenting must be added to religion and politics as verboten subjects for polite conversation. A column I published back in December of 2016 went viral...

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Home Alone: Is Your Child Ready?

Posted on 3/9/2017

For some folks, the phrase "latchkey child" rings of parental neglect. Yet, unlike in the movies, most kids who are left unattended in an empty house do just fine, emotionally and otherwise....

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Make American Parenting Great Again!

Posted on 3/8/2017

The problem in American parenting is the 1960s. Among other things that defined that very interesting decade was the replacement of rationality by emotionality. It was during the 1960s that the...

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Manners More Important Than Resentful Child

Posted on 1/25/2017

“People almost invariably arrive at their beliefs not on the basis of proof but on the basis of what they find attractive.” So said 17th Century French mathematician and philosopher...

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In a Family, Parents' Relationship Comes First

Posted on 12/28/2016

I recently asked a married couple who have three kids, none of whom are yet teens, “Who are the most important people in your family?” Like all good moms and dads of this brave new...

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Accommodate Dietary Choices During the Holidays?

Posted on 12/14/2016

Q: My husband and I are looking forward to hosting our children and grandchildren over the Holidays—or were. We were recently informed that our 30-something daughter and two of her children...

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When Enough Is Not Enough

Posted on 12/6/2016

The following true story was recently related to me by a credible individual who for obvious reasons will remain forever anonymous. I pass it on because it is a quintessential example of the...

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Society Has Dumbed-Down the Definition of Bullying

Posted on 10/18/2016

Noting that October is Bullying Prevention Month, several editors have asked if I am willing to write an apropos column. I am and for two reasons feel eminently qualified to do so. ...

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The Effects of 'Parenting' on Child-Rearing

Posted on 10/5/2016

In 1971, a psychologist named Fitzhugh Dodson published a book titled How to Parent. It did so well that he came out several years later with How to Father. By 1971, Dodson was one of a handful,...

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Postmodern Psychological Parenting Is Causing More Harm Than Good

Posted on 9/27/2016

In the late 1960s, America came to a fork in the parenting road and took the road never traveled. My generation did what no generation in any culture at any time in history had ever done: we broke...

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Although the World Is More Complex, There Is No Need for Parental Anxiety

Posted on 5/31/2016

“Puzzled Grandma in the South” recently wrote to “Dear Abby” asking “Why is there so much angst today over raising children, especially in young mothers?” Grandma has observed that moms of her...

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Unconditional Love and Leadership Can Change a 'Bad' Child

Posted on 5/24/2016

True story: I sent one of my more recent books to a radio talk-show host who, in turn, gave it to one of her “readers,” asking him to extract appropriate questions. Said reader, a...

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It Is Not a Parent's Job to Solve All of a Child's Problems

Posted on 3/29/2016

Q: We have a 7-year-old son and two girls ages 9 and 6. The girls are gifted academically and athletically. He simply can’t keep up with them. They’re even better at bike-riding. As a result, he...

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Parents Opposed to Sleepovers Should Reconsider

Posted on 3/22/2016

Q: My husband and I have decided that we do not want our children to participate in sleep-overs. We recently moved to a new community and are just making new friends and meeting new families. All...

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Today's Grandparent's Deserve Well-Behaved Grandchildren

Posted on 2/23/2016

A recent article on grandparenting.com says that many baby boomers are experiencing difficulties in their relationships with adult children, including “not enough time together, not enough regular...

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Parenting Disagreements Fracture More than Just Marriages

Posted on 1/19/2016

A journalist asks, “Why do today’s parents seem to be having so many more parenting difficulties than did parents of previous generations?” There is more than one answer to the question; or,...

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Boys Bathing Together

Posted on 12/22/2015

Q: My 7-year-old recently had his 9-year-old friend over to spend the night. At their request, I let them take a bubble bath together. I supervised, of course. They had fun squirting one another...

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Parenting Memes

Posted on 12/15/2015

According to Wikipedia, a meme is "an idea…that spreads from person to person within a culture". A meme is analogous to a mental virus—although not necessarily bad—that “catches on” relatively...

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Parenting Experts Part III

Posted on 12/8/2015

This is the third and final installment of my “Wrong Things Experts Have Said (and Still Say)” series. Thus far: I’ve debunked the myth that a consequence must be delivered immediately in order...

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Parenting Experts Part II

Posted on 12/1/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond This is the second installment of my three-part series on wrong ideas disseminated by so-called parenting experts. All three columns will be posted...

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Parenting Experts

Posted on 11/24/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond The subject of today’s lesson is so-called experts who don’t know what they’re talking about. As the reader might already have...

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In the Good Old Days...

Posted on 11/3/2015

In the 1960s, as part of an overall, culture-wide paradigm shift, a sea-change took place concerning our collective understandings concerning the rearing of children. The two fundamental questions...

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It's the Little Things That Count

Posted on 10/27/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond It’s the little things that count…always That’s true when it comes to being a citizen, an employee, and a spouse. It’s also true of being a...

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Quick Questions from Parents

Posted on 10/20/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond A collection of “shorties”—questions from parents that require less than 100-word answers: Q: Can you tell me why my 34-month-old daughter...

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A Q&A with John Rosemond

Posted on 10/13/2015

A composite of recent questions posed to me by journalists, along with my answers: Q: What is the biggest problem in American parenting? A: The marriage not lasting much past the...

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5 Tips for Teaching Your Child Humility

Posted on 10/6/2015

A mother who attended a recent presentation during which I described the differences between high self-esteem and humility writes asking “What should my husband and I be doing to help our children...

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Act Like An Authority Figure

Posted on 9/22/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond The following statement is true: A child’s natural response to the proper presentation of authority is obedience. The following...

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Paradoxical Parenting Principle

Posted on 9/15/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond One of the problems I occasionally struggle with is that of giving unsatisfactory answers to people’s questions. By that, I mean answers I know are...

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ADHD and Diet

Posted on 9/1/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond In America, the go-to guy on ADHD is Dr. Russell Barkley, whose impressive credentials include psychologist, clinical professor of psychiatry at...

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More on Attachment Parenting

Posted on 8/18/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond In a recent column, I referred to “attachment parenting babble,” which is to say, I called a spade a spade. The column in question concerned...

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Making a Change

Posted on 8/4/2015

This is a story about how quickly parents, if they are determined enough, can make significant change in parenting policy. The family in question consists of two boys, ages 9 and 8,...

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Lowering the Boom

Posted on 7/7/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond One of the most common of complaints from today’s parents is “we’ve tried everything.” They refer, of course, to having tried numerous approaches...

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The Very Essence of Effective Discipline

Posted on 6/9/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Two months ago, I conducted a two-day small-group “parent retreat” during which I talked about, among other things, the legitimacy and power of...

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Adults, Especially Moms: Keep It Interesting!

Posted on 5/27/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond My mother was a most unusual woman for her generation. She divorced my father when I was three, went to college and eventually obtained a Ph.D. in...

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Grandma Needs Advice

Posted on 5/12/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: My husband and I need your advice. We are parents to one adult daughter who has three children ages 10, 7, and 4. They live about three hours away...

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Perhaps There is Still Hope!

Posted on 4/29/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond A list of some of the more memorable elements of pre-1960s parenting is in constant circulation on the Internet and is especially popular with...

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Use Proper Authority with Teens

Posted on 4/21/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: Our son is going to be 13 next year and we’re trying to be proactive about the coming storm. He’s been a good kid and relatively easy to raise to...

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Using Consequences

Posted on 4/14/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: Why is it that no consequence seems to work for long, if at all, with my very strong-willed 7-year-old daughter? I have tried everything I’ve ever...

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Fear Trumps Facts

Posted on 4/7/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond One of the signs of these confused and confusing times we live in is that facts don’t matter. What matters are feelings and opinions, which are...

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Stressing Out Over Children

Posted on 3/31/2015

Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond I’ve asked the men in several recent audiences to raise hands if they believe moms stress out concerning their children at least five times more...

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