John's Articles
Help Son Learn to Give and Take In Conversation
Posted on 11/15/2022
Q: My just-turned four-year-old repeats things he has heard or has said before. For example, even though my brother’s family moved away nearly two years ago, whenever we drive by their...
Read MoreSchool Principal Asks About Discipline
Posted on 10/25/2022
Q: I am a principal at a private church-affiliated school. Contrary to my graduate school training and most of my peers’ practice, I believe disciplinary actions should "fit the crime."...
Read More'Parenting' vs. Child-Rearing
Posted on 8/23/2022
“The goal of parenting is not to control, coerce or punish children into being ‘good.’ The goal of parenting is to grow children who can feel all of their feelings and become empathic...
Read MoreWhat Should Single Mom Do About Disrespectful Son?
Posted on 6/7/2022
Q: I’m a single mother with a 13-year-old son. His father, whom he sees infrequently, has PTSD from battle experiences. My son has anger toward his father, but I can’t get him to talk about it....
Read MoreKids Need Parents Who Are Authentic Adults
Posted on 3/22/2022
The contemporary parenting ideal consists of equal parts fixer, go-fer, and friend, which is why, when it is encountered in the flesh by someone of my ancient age, the new definition of a “good...
Read More‘Parenting’ vs Childrearing
Posted on 1/25/2022
I often go looking for parenting ideas that illustrate the difference between so-called “parenting” and mere childrearing. They abound. My latest find came in the form of a 2018 article on...
Read MoreNo New Tricks To Raising Kids
Posted on 11/30/2021
What is “gentle parenting”? It did not take much investigation for me to conclude that it is merely a rebranding of the same old, same old parenting babble America’s mental health establishment...
Read MoreFixing Our 'Parent-View'
Posted on 9/28/2021
Most of the problems today’s parents are experiencing in the course of raising children are due to a faulty “parent-view.” Just as one’s worldview consists of attitudes, values, and expectations...
Read MoreHow To Help Your Child Get More Grit
Posted on 9/7/2021
It’s all over the web, that “grit” thing. Seems like every day, I get some promo for a webinar on how to get more grit, project more grit, or get in touch with your inner grit. So, allow me to...
Read MorePsychological Parenting Is a Prescription for Enabling
Posted on 8/24/2021
Q: In your column, you have often spoken of “psychological parenting.” What, exactly, do you mean by that? A: Answering your question requires that we first unpack the word “parenting,” the...
Read MoreKids Don’t Need Curing, They Need Correcting
Posted on 5/18/2021
No small number of today’s parents view their children through psychological lenses, especially when it comes to misbehavior. Instead of regarding a given misbehavior as simply an error that needs...
Read MoreThe Futility of Reasoning With Children
Posted on 5/4/2021
Many if not most if not almost all of today’s parents believe in magic words. They do so because the mental health professional community has for fifty years or so told them that children can be...
Read MoreThe More You Try To Make Child Happy, the More Unhappy They Will Be
Posted on 1/19/2021
Making children happy became a parenting goal in the early 1970s. The paradox, as everyone with a modicum of commonsense knows, is that the more effort parents put into making a child happy, the...
Read MoreMoodiness Is Merely a Bad Emotional Habit
Posted on 10/27/2020
Living with an emotionally dramatic child is no fun. They throw wet blankets over nearly every family gathering or outing. Little is right in their lives and attempts to cheer them up generally...
Read MoreParents Can Recover From Not Getting Over the 'Hump of Parenting'
Posted on 10/20/2020
Q: In a recent column, you identified toddlerhood as “the hump of parenting.” As a grandmother who managed to raise five kids who were out of the house in their early twenties and are responsible...
Read MoreThe More You Say “No," the Less Effective It Becomes
Posted on 10/13/2020
Q: Our first child, a boy, just turned two. Per your advice, he is toilet trained and eating whatever I serve. Before he was born, we determined that we were not going to raise a picky eater. Our...
Read MoreWhere We All Went Wrong
Posted on 8/25/2020
My profession, psychology, began demonizing traditional childrearing in the late 1960s. I was in graduate school at the time and on fire for the promise that the proper use of psychological...
Read MoreAppreciate the Odd Among Us
Posted on 5/26/2020
I have come up with a new psychological diagnosis, one that I won’t, however, be submitting for approval to the powers that be: simply, odd. My “odd” is to be distinguished from ODD, the acronym...
Read MoreThe Biggest Mistakes Parents Make (and How to Stop Making Them!) - Part 2
Posted on 2/11/2020
This is the second in a series of three columns on the Biggest Mistakes Parents Make (and How to Stop Making Them!). Last week, I identified giving children explanations for parental instructions,...
Read MoreFather's Visitation With Child Should Be Allowed
Posted on 1/15/2020
Q: Our ten-year-old granddaughter lives with us. We have custody of her but her father, our son, is now asking us for visitation privileges. I probably don’t need to tell you that both he and his...
Read MorePlaying War Games Not Unusual for Young Boys
Posted on 10/22/2019
Q: My normally happy 6-year-old son has recently started incorporating death and war-like games into his imaginative play. He isn't and has never been a mean-spirited child, but his dad and I just...
Read More"The Doctor" Is the Tool Every Parent Needs
Posted on 10/15/2019
I have good news for parents: You do not need more than a few tools in your disciplinary tool-bag. One especially valuable tool, one that belongs in every modern home, is the “Doctor.” The Doctor...
Read MoreToday's Parents Afraid Kids Won't Like Them
Posted on 8/13/2019
Short questions I’ve been asked of late (mostly by journalists) and proportionately short answers: Q: Is there a single most important thing parents should be teaching during their children’s...
Read MoreEmancipation of Adult Children Can Be Messy
Posted on 6/4/2019
When children were raised, reared, or simply brought up, they emancipated “on time.” Upon high school graduation, children went to college, into the military, or became employed. Some, like my...
Read MoreKids Acting Up? Relax, It's Normal
Posted on 7/24/2018
Most of the stuff today's parents worry about - and let's face facts...the worrier in question, the worrier supreme, is almost always the mother (not because of some weakness, but simply because...
Read MoreDon't Tolerate Sassy Behavior
Posted on 11/15/2017
Q: Our 8-year-old has suddenly developed a very sassy mouth. She picked this up from a new neighborhood friend who speaks to her mother in a very disrespectful tone, like she’s the girl’s...
Read MoreAmerica Needs a Parenting Retro-Revolution
Posted on 6/21/2017
I was honored to be a guest on my good friend Dennis Prager’s syndicated radio program the other day and as anyone who is familiar with my point-of-view on parenting matters will appreciate, much...
Read MoreObedience: It's All in How You Ask for It
Posted on 3/1/2017
I’ve said it many times, but it bears repeating: A child’s natural response to the proper presentation of authority is obedience; as in, the first time the child is told to do something, he does...
Read MoreParadoxical Parenting Principle
Posted on 9/15/2015
One of the problems I occasionally struggle with is that of giving unsatisfactory answers to people’s questions. By that, I mean answers I know are unsatisfactory in the sense that they do not...
Read MoreParents Need to Act Now for Son
Posted on 8/11/2015
Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: Our 17-year-old has completely fallen apart! In less than a year, he’s gone from being an outstanding honors student, athlete, and well-mannered...
Read MoreLowering the Boom
Posted on 7/7/2015
Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond One of the most common of complaints from today’s parents is “we’ve tried everything.” They refer, of course, to having tried numerous approaches...
Read MoreNicotine Use
Posted on 6/30/2015
Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: We just discovered that our 17-year-old is using nicotine. He tells us he’s been using for the past several months, smoking two to four cigarettes a...
Read MoreJealous Sibling and Words of Wisdom for Toddler's Parents
Posted on 6/23/2015
Living with Children John Rosemond Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: My 24-month-old is constantly wanting to be in her newborn baby brother’s face, poking and touching him. How can...
Read More8-year-old Manipulates, Whines
Posted on 6/16/2015
Living with Children John Rosemond Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: Our 8-year-old daughter tries to manipulate us and her siblings (she is the youngest of three) with emotional...
Read More14-year-old Anger Issues
Posted on 6/2/2015
Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: Our 14-year-old daughter has difficulty controlling her anger. She has extreme outbursts fairly frequently here at home—screaming, cursing, and even...
Read MorePunishment Shouldn't Fit the Crime
Posted on 5/12/2015
Copyright 2015 John K. Rosemond Q: Why is it that no consequence seems to work for long, if at all, with my very strong-willed 7-year-old daughter? I have tried everything I’ve ever...
Read MoreUse Proper Authority with Teens
Posted on 4/21/2015
Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: Our son is going to be 13 next year and we’re trying to be proactive about the coming storm. He’s been a good kid and relatively easy to raise to...
Read MoreUsing Consequences
Posted on 4/14/2015
Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: Why is it that no consequence seems to work for long, if at all, with my very strong-willed 7-year-old daughter? I have tried everything I’ve ever...
Read MoreSimple Curiosity?
Posted on 8/19/2014
Q: Our 5-year-old grandson sees his 5-year-old female first cousin from time to time. After they play for a while, he tells her he wants to “touch” her. This has happened twice in recent...
Read MoreImpulse Control: A Hallmark of Life
Posted on 8/5/2014
A mom recently asked me what I would say to my son if he was twelve years old and wanted a Mohawk haircut for the summer. I told her I’d say no. “But is it really that...
Read MoreSimple Solutions
Posted on 7/29/2014
I absolutely love it when people begin to realize that the problems they’re having with a child are of their own making; when they begin to realize, in other words, that the child is not the...
Read MoreFour Year Old Baby Talk
Posted on 4/29/2014
Q: Our 4-year-old son (middle child with older and younger sisters) frequently uses "baby talk". It doesn't seem to be a way of seeking attention, because when we ask him to repeat in his "big...
Read MoreTeen Will Not Brush Teeth
Posted on 4/29/2014
Q: My 14-year-old son does not brush his teeth, except during the week before going to the dentist. He doesn't have any cavities, his breath is fine, his check-ups at the dentist are at the...
Read MoreDoes Animal Torture = Sociopath?
Posted on 4/15/2014
Q: My 18 year old son and a slightly younger friend recently found some mice and decided to dispose of them. They drowned one and set the other one on fire. When I confronted my son for torturing...
Read MoreBe the Parent Your Child Needs
Posted on 4/1/2014
Q: My 14-year-old daughter says I don't trust her because unlike her best friend's parents, I won't allow her to stay home alone for several days while I go out of town. Her friend's parents do...
Read MoreConsequences
Posted on 11/12/2013
Q: We have discovered that our 17-year-old son recently went to school, checked in, and then, a short time later, left. To our knowledge, he's never done this before. His explanation was that he...
Read MoreCooperation
Posted on 11/5/2013
One of the most problematic words in America's post-1960s parenting language is "cooperate." "I want my children to cooperate," a parent tells me. She tells me this in the midst of...
Read MoreTheir Biology Makes Them Do It!
Posted on 10/22/2013
The "their biology makes them do it!" hypothesis concerning the oft-horrid behavior of today's teens keeps on rolling along, charming parents of said teens into the comforting belief that...
Read MoreWhat No Child Has Ever Said!
Posted on 10/8/2013
Q: My 5-year-old daughter has developed a bad habit of arguing with me whenever I refuse her something, anything. Believe me when I tell you she is relentless. She will continue to argue until...
Read MoreKicking Out of the Garden of Eden [Explained]
Posted on 10/6/2013
Kicking the child out of the Garden of Eden John's "Garden of Eden" statement: Other Q and A or articles about this method may be searched by using the keyword "Garden" Below is detailed...
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