John's Articles
We Shouldn't Always Shield Our Children From Pain
Posted today
The depraved excepted, parents do not enjoy making children unhappy. Nevertheless, sometimes it is in a child's best interest that parents - while not deliberately trying to induce unhappiness -...
Read MoreBack Off on Daughter’s Eyeliner Use
Posted on 6/28/2022
Q: Our 14-year-old daughter is a rising high school sophomore. We let her wear eyeliner this past year, but she is wearing entirely too much. She is well-adjusted (plays sports, good grades) but...
Read MoreDon't Enable Entitled Teen
Posted on 4/19/2022
A recent online article concerned a mom who refused to pay her teenage daughter for doing household chores. A poll of readers found that an overwhelming majority of them agreed with the...
Read MoreKids Need Parents Who Are Authentic Adults
Posted on 3/22/2022
The contemporary parenting ideal consists of equal parts fixer, go-fer, and friend, which is why, when it is encountered in the flesh by someone of my ancient age, the new definition of a “good...
Read MoreIs Vaping Ok for High School Senior?
Posted on 2/15/2022
Q: Our son, a senior in high school, is vaping. He claims he does it to control his anxiety. I worry about him getting into harder drugs when when he goes to college this coming fall. What’s your...
Read MoreJust 'Stop It!'
Posted on 10/12/2021
I often find myself telling parents that they need to stop doing something that is counterproductive and, in most cases, contributing significantly to whatever parenting problem is bedeviling...
Read MoreShould Son Switch Schools?
Posted on 10/5/2021
Q: Our 13-year-old eighth-grader says he doesn’t like the small private school he attends and wants us to put him in public high school next year. His grades are fine, he’s got several close...
Read MoreHow To Help Your Child Get More Grit
Posted on 9/7/2021
It’s all over the web, that “grit” thing. Seems like every day, I get some promo for a webinar on how to get more grit, project more grit, or get in touch with your inner grit. So, allow me to...
Read MoreFour Steps To Give Argumentative Teenager the Last Word (and Restore Sanity)
Posted on 6/8/2021
Q: My fifteen-year-old daughter is slowly driving me insane! She argues with me about everything and always wants the last word. No matter how well I explain the “why?” of a decision to her, she...
Read MoreToday’s Kids Suffer a Lack of Common Sense in Their Lives
Posted on 12/22/2020
A journalist asks, “What is the biggest challenge facing today’s children?” “The real world,” I said. For the last fifty years or so, good parenting has been defined...
Read MoreTeen Not a Suicide Risk
Posted on 7/23/2019
My recent column pertaining to a 12-year-old who told his parents he’d thought about suicide several times over the past six months stirred a fair number of folks to respond. Feelings toward the...
Read MoreHow to Talk to Teens About Internet Pornography
Posted on 7/16/2019
Q: We recently discovered that our 12-year-old has been visiting pornography sites of all sorts on the Internet. When we caught him red-handed, he began crying and said he is addicted. Apparently,...
Read MoreSimple Solutions for Teens, Tantrums and Smartphones
Posted on 12/4/2018
Q: Our 15-year-old daughter is very demanding and, to be honest, self-centered. One of the things she does is ask one of us for something and demand an instant decision, as in, “Can I go to the...
Read MoreMake 'Em an Offer They Can't Refuse
Posted on 10/16/2018
When I was a child, my most important possession was my bicycle, followed closely by my radio. My bike was how I got around. I rode it to school, friend’s houses, pick-up...
Read More15-Year-Old Daughter Should Not Get Private Time With 20-Year-Old Boyfriend
Posted on 6/13/2018
Q: Our 15-year-old daughter has told us she’s in love with a 20-year-old guy who is in the Army and intending to make the Army his career. We’ve met him, and he is extremely respectful and...
Read MoreRespect for Adults Is Good for Kids' Mental Health
Posted on 6/6/2018
Rates of child and teen depression and suicide continue to rise, as they have for fifty years. As regular readers of this column know, I do not agree in the least with current explanations, much...
Read MoreThe Peer Group: When to Do Something, What to Do, and When to Do Nothing
Posted on 5/1/2018
No question about it, the peer group exerts great influence on teenagers. From the way they dress to the way they carry their books, the stamp of peer pressure is upon them. If the influence is...
Read MoreCar Gives Eric a Chance to Grow Up
Posted on 4/27/2018
"Dad! I've decided what kind of car I want to get when I'm 16! Look at this!" "Eric," I said, brushing away the copy of Car Trader he'd stuck in my face, "I've told you a hundred times, I'm not...
Read MoreTake Smartphone Away from Sassy Teen
Posted on 2/21/2018
Q: When our daughter, an only child, turned thirteen and entered the 8th grade, it was like a switch was flipped. Almost overnight, she went from being a sweet, respectful and obedient child who...
Read MoreStrike While the Iron Is Cold
Posted on 11/17/2017
Recently, a mother asked how she and her husband could make their 16-year-old son stop talking disrespectfully to them. So far, she said, they'd complained, threatened and occasionally taken his...
Read MoreStay the Course With Rebellious Teen
Posted on 5/23/2017
Q: Our 18-year-old daughter is a month away from high school graduation and she is failing nearly every class! About six months ago, she took up with a group of young adults who are less than...
Read MoreTeenage Boys Need Healthy Adult Role Models
Posted on 5/3/2017
When my son, Eric, began showing interest in girls, I reflected back upon the foibles and fiascoes of my adolescence and promised myself he would be better prepared for datinghood. Undertaking...
Read MoreTake a Time-Out Before Engaging With Argumentative Child
Posted on 11/22/2016
Q: In last week’s column, you advised parents not to argue with teenagers. That’s fine and dandy advice, John, but you failed to tell your readers how to stay out of or end these arguments. For...
Read MoreA Non-Argumentative Teen Is a Happy One
Posted on 11/15/2016
My advice to The Wall Street Journal, the only news source to which I subscribe: Stop trying to be all things to all people. Specifically, stop giving parenting advice. The latest attempt by...
Read MoreSmart Car for Teens May Not Be the Smart Choice
Posted on 8/9/2016
Greg Fulton thinks his teenage daughter, who’s already hit three solid objects with her car—thankfully, no humans or other moving vehicles included—would do better with a car that comes equipped...
Read MoreRoll With Young Adult's Self-Absorption
Posted on 7/5/2016
Q: What can we reasonably expect of our 18-year-old daughter when she comes home on weekends from her summer job? She usually heads straight to her boyfriend's family’s home and rolls in around 3...
Read MoreCustody Issue: Teen Acts Aggressively Towards Mother
Posted on 1/12/2016
Q: My ex-husband and I have pretty much fifty-fifty custody of our 15-year-old son, who has become infected with his father’s disrespect for me. When he’s with me, he makes it very clear that he...
Read MorePuberty and Teenage Girls
Posted on 11/17/2015
Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond A recent caller to my syndicated radio show (Saturdays, 6 pm EST, American Family Radio) objected to advice I dispensed concerning a teenage girl...
Read MoreLeave Him to His Own Devices
Posted on 9/29/2015
Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: My 14-year-old son started public high school this year and immediately fell into his old bad habits. He’s intelligent and capable of making...
Read MoreParents Need to Act Now for Son
Posted on 8/11/2015
Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: Our 17-year-old has completely fallen apart! In less than a year, he’s gone from being an outstanding honors student, athlete, and well-mannered...
Read More14-year-old Anger Issues
Posted on 6/2/2015
Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: Our 14-year-old daughter has difficulty controlling her anger. She has extreme outbursts fairly frequently here at home—screaming, cursing, and even...
Read MoreAdoption Advice
Posted on 5/19/2015
Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: We have two children, ages 9 and 5, and are considering adopting a third, perhaps an older child, even a teenager. Do you have any advice for us? ...
Read MoreUse Proper Authority with Teens
Posted on 4/21/2015
Copyright 2015, John K. Rosemond Q: Our son is going to be 13 next year and we’re trying to be proactive about the coming storm. He’s been a good kid and relatively easy to raise to...
Read MoreAlarming Trends
Posted on 3/3/2015
In the 1960s, child and teen mental health and behavior problems began an alarming rise that has continued to the present. In 1970, one of my grad school professors proposed that this trend could...
Read MoreTeens Want Later Curfews
Posted on 2/3/2015
Copyright 2015 John K. Rosemond Q: My twin boys just turned 13 and are demanding—that is the right word—later curfews. They tell us that their curfew, which is 8:30 on nights when there...
Read MoreExpanding a Teen's Freedom with Fiscal Program
Posted on 1/13/2015
Teenagers are highly motivated by any opportunity to expand their freedom. More freedom is in fact THE MOST POWERFUL OF ALL MOTIVATORS for teens. I wouldn’t have put it in capitals if it wasn’t. ...
Read MoreImpulse Control: A Hallmark of Life
Posted on 8/5/2014
A mom recently asked me what I would say to my son if he was twelve years old and wanted a Mohawk haircut for the summer. I told her I’d say no. “But is it really that...
Read MoreGood Parenting Decisions
Posted on 5/20/2014
Q: For the first five years of her life, it was just me and my now 13-year-old daughter. I didn’t have a clue as to what I was doing. I wasn’t consistent; I didn’t hold her accountable; I was an...
Read MoreTeen has bad Attitude at home
Posted on 5/6/2014
Q: Our 13-year-old daughter has a very bad attitude, mostly when it comes to our family. She stays in her room most of the time, reading, and only participates in family activities if we force...
Read MoreTeen Will Not Brush Teeth
Posted on 4/29/2014
Q: My 14-year-old son does not brush his teeth, except during the week before going to the dentist. He doesn't have any cavities, his breath is fine, his check-ups at the dentist are at the...
Read MoreDoes Animal Torture = Sociopath?
Posted on 4/15/2014
Q: My 18 year old son and a slightly younger friend recently found some mice and decided to dispose of them. They drowned one and set the other one on fire. When I confronted my son for torturing...
Read MoreBe the Parent Your Child Needs
Posted on 4/1/2014
Q: My 14-year-old daughter says I don't trust her because unlike her best friend's parents, I won't allow her to stay home alone for several days while I go out of town. Her friend's parents do...
Read MoreKeep a Sharp Eye on Electronics
Posted on 1/28/2014
Q: Our 13-year-old son has had an iPod for the last 3 years. We've always made use of the parental restrictions to make sure that he could only access "clean" music, movies, and websites. When I...
Read MoreThe "Hang in There Principle"
Posted on 11/26/2013
Q: My 11-year-old son cuts corners on everything. If he does a chore, he'll leave the cleaning products behind. If his bed his hard to make he hides the sheet in the closet and throws the blanket...
Read MoreTheir Biology Makes Them Do It!
Posted on 10/22/2013
The "their biology makes them do it!" hypothesis concerning the oft-horrid behavior of today's teens keeps on rolling along, charming parents of said teens into the comforting belief that...
Read MoreTeaching: Then and Now
Posted on 10/15/2013
The most valuable course I took in high school was typing. I took two semesters of it my sophomore year at Proviso West High School in Hillside, Illinois. By the end of the second...
Read MoreKicking Out of the Garden of Eden [Explained]
Posted on 10/6/2013
Kicking the child out of the Garden of Eden John's "Garden of Eden" statement: Other Q and A or articles about this method may be searched by using the keyword "Garden" Below is detailed...
Read MoreShould I Let My 17-Year-Old Son Go on 'Senior Beach Week'?
Posted on 3/12/2013
<b>Q: In our city, most of the high school seniors participate in “Senior Beach Week” during spring break. They rent beach houses and condos and party like there’s no tomorrow. Alcohol, marijuana...
Read MoreLast Chance for Major Change
Posted on 2/5/2013
Q: Our 17-year-old is a highly spoiled underachiever. As a junior in high school, he's failing two classes and borderline in the rest. We know that his problems are largely due to our parenting...
Read More17-Year-Old Girl Dating Issue
Posted on 11/1/2011
Daughter is 17, but dad forbids dating Q: My husband won't allow our 17-year-old daughter to date. She is an excellent student, very involved in activities at school and church, and has never...
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