John's Articles
Mother Rewards 8-Year-Old for Misbehavior
Posted on 5/5/1998
MOTHER IS REWARDING CHILD FOR DISOBEYING A good friend told me the following story. She called it a joke, although I'm not sure everyone would agree. This couple owned a large dog named...
Read MoreMom of 4-Year-Old Agonizes Over Academics
Posted on 2/24/1998
LEAVE IT UP TO YOUR CHILD TO LEARN FROM EITHER TEACHER Q. I work daily with my very active 4-year-old, trying to get him started in reading, but he doesn't show any real interest. Furthermore,...
Read MoreMom of 3-Year-Old Wants to be Friends with her Child
Posted on 2/17/1998
KIDS NEED PARENTS; YOU CAN BE FRIENDS LATER Q. On a recent radio talk show, you said today's parents make problems for both themselves and their children by trying to be friends with them. I...
Read MoreHusband and Wives Need to Keep Promises
Posted on 2/10/1998
PROMISE KEEPERS CHALLENGES HUSBANDS, BUT WHAT ABOUT WIVES? Over the past few months, journalists have asked what I think of Promise Keepers and, more specifically, its notion that men are the...
Read MoreMom Has Lousy Relationship with 15-Year-Old
Posted on 12/30/1997
AN APOLOGY A WEEK MAY WORK WONDERS Q. My 15-year-old daughter and I have a lousy relationship, and I'm to blame. When she was about 12, I realized she had a mind of her own and wasn't going to...
Read MoreAmerican Female Parent Has Abdicated Her Authority Over Her Children
Posted on 8/12/1997
A LITTLE-WELL-PLACED MISERY WORKS WONDERS In my life as a public speaker, I often poll my audiences on various topics, sometimes to illustrate a point, sometimes to both collect and impart...
Read MoreMoms Suffer Verbal Abuse and Emotional Harrassment From Children and Still Serve Them
Posted on 6/24/1997
UPPITY CHILDREN STAND IN WAY OF MOTHERS' FINAL LIBERATION Several months ago, during a workshop I was giving somewhere in America, a woman remarked, "I'd have never spoken to my mother the way...
Read MoreParents of 8-Year-Old Have Different Discipline Methods Concerning Her Tantrums
Posted on 9/26/1996
HOW TO RECONCILE DISCIPLINE STYLES Her 8-year-old daughter, the mother told me with great concern, had recently thrown a tantrum over not getting her way about something. The child eventually...
Read MoreWomen Should be Wives First and Mothers Second
Posted on 5/30/1996
MOTHERS, DON'T FORGET TO BE WIVES ONCE YOU HAVE KIDS I was recently in Somewhere, USA, where I talked on the unfortunate consequences to families and children of the prevailing nouveau idea...
Read MoreLaid-Back Moms Of the Year
Posted on 12/1/1995
THE RIGHT STUFF, NO GUFF: THAT'S LAID-BACK MOM Back in September, I announced Rosemond's Laid-back Mom of the Year Awards as follows: "Entrants must describe in 250 words or less how they...
Read MoreToday's Standard: More Time One Expends in Service of Children, the Better Mom One Is
Posted on 10/6/1995
YOU MAY ALREADY BE A WINNER AS A LAID-BACK MOM A few days ago, I received a news release from the M&M/Mars Co. for the "Kudos'' Working Mother of the Year Awards. "Working mother,'' the...
Read MoreWives and Mothers are Plently Powerful People
Posted on 9/23/1994
A TALK ABOUT EQUALITY I came across the following quote in an airline magazine last week: "In my 20s and early 30s,'' said the nationally known female personal-growth guru, "I gave away my...
Read MoreMothers and Daughters Dressing Alike
Posted on 9/9/1994
WHEN MOTHERS DRESS LIKE DAUGHTERS, GUESS WHO SHOULD KNOW BETTER? Fashion alert! For the second time in as many days, I have seen with my own eyes a mother and daughter dressed exactly alike....
Read MoreParent Care vs Day Care - Part 4
Posted on 7/2/1993
ONCE AGAIN, LISTEN UP: CARING FOR CHILD AT HOME IS BETTER THAN DAY CARE Jennifer Mitchell, a columnist for the Des Moines (Iowa) Register, recently took me to task for saying that at-home...
Read MoreDon't Just Wait Until Father Gets Home; Make Kid Obey Mom, Too
Posted on 6/4/1993
Q. Our 11-year-old will not obey his mother. In addition, he refuses to accept time-out (in a dining room chair) from her and becomes physical if she tries to make him go. There's not a weekday...
Read MoreTake Time to be a Wife and not Just a Mother
Posted on 4/23/1993
MOTHERS NEED TO REMEMBER THEY ARE ALSO PEOPLE Spying me mingling with the audience a few minutes before I was to make a presentation, she walked up and said, "Do you know what really bugs me...
Read MoreParent Care vs Day Care - Part 3
Posted on 3/19/1993
OUTRAGE OVER CHILD-CARE COLUMN POINTS TO THE REAL PROBLEM: DECLINE OF FAMILY In a feature article and two separate editorials, The Des Moines Register has taken me to task for a column in...
Read MoreThe Truth about the American Family
Posted on 3/12/1993
ON THE PLAYGROUND OF AMERICA, THE FAMILY'S SLIDING FAST For the past 30 years, the American family has been "changing," or so the media inform us. The subliminal impression created is that...
Read MoreChild Obeys Father, But Not Mother
Posted on 2/12/1993
CHILD OBEYS HER FATHER BUT NOT HER MOTHER A woman recently asked, "Why does my daughter give me nothing but static and grief every single time I ask her to do something, whereas my husband...
Read MoreParent Care vs Day Care - Part 2
Posted on 12/18/1992
Q. I read a recent column of yours in which you said that parent care during the first three years of life is preferable to daycare. I tend to agree, but wouldn't some children be better off in...
Read MoreParent Care vs Day Care - Part 1
Posted on 12/4/1992
STAYING AT HOME ENCOURAGES INDEPENDENCE IN TODDLER I recently wrote that parent care during the first three years of life is highly preferable, in most cases, to day care. A number of folks...
Read MoreMom Author Decides to Stay at Home by Choice
Posted on 10/16/1992
HOME BY CHOICE' MAY CHANGE YOUR MIND ABOUT A MOM'S ROLE In the summer of 1991, a copy of psychologist Brenda Hunter's "Home By Choice" (Multnomah, $13.99) arrived at my office, offered by the...
Read MoreRole of Women Has Changed Over Time
Posted on 10/2/1992
IN THE GOOD OLD DAYS THEY WERE HOUSEWIVES, NOT VICTIMS Listening several weeks ago to a radio talk show, I heard a woman who called herself a feminist make the claim that women of her...
Read MoreMom Prefers to Work Than Stay at Home with Kids
Posted on 3/6/1992
STAY-AT-HOME MOM' HAS MORE GUILT THAN OLD-FASHIONED HOUSEWIFE Q. The author of a parenting book I just read takes a strong position in favor of mothers staying home with their children at...
Read MoreMoms Believe Success of Child Rests on Their Shoulders
Posted on 4/28/1991
MEN - AND WOMEN - MAINTAIN UNHEALTHY MYTHS ABOUT MOTHERING A number of months ago, I wrote a column in which I said that we are a "single parent culture." Not that many parents are single,...
Read MoreRoles of Husband and Wife Taking Care of 8-Month-Old
Posted on 4/21/1991
HOW DO PARENTS PRESERVE A MARRIAGE WHILE KIDS ARE YOUNG? Q. My husband and I heard you speak in Orlando (Fla.) and were especially interested in your advice to parents, that they act...
Read More7-Year-Old Wants to be with Dad More Than Mom
Posted on 12/30/1990
GIRL, 7, SUDDENLY WANTS TO BE WITH DAD MORE THAN MOM Q. My 7-year-old girl has recently become very attached to her daddy. She wants to cuddle with him a lot, asks to go places with him, and...
Read MoreWomen Carry Burden of Parenting on Their Shoulders
Posted on 10/28/1990
EVEN MOMS WHO HAVE MATES SHOULDER ALL THE PARENTAL LOAD "How is he able to remain so cool and collected when our son acts up?" she asks. "I absolutely churn with every conceivable emotion,...
Read MoreHow to be a Good Parent: Part 1
Posted on 7/22/1990
AFTER 21 YEARS, I DISCOVER HOW TO BE A GOOD PARENT: PRACTICE, PRACTICE Some thoughts on parenthood collected during the last 21 years of trying to make it work: * The purpose of parenting...
Read MoreWorking Mother
Posted on 3/11/1990
LET'S STAMP OUT SEXISM: DON'T SAY WORKING MOTHER Working mother. This seemingly benign phrase - referring, of course, to women who have chosen to raise children and hold down jobs - is one...
Read MoreMom Torn About Returning to Work After Having Baby
Posted on 8/13/1989
FAMILY DAY CARE SETTING IS BEST FOR INFANTS Q. I took a leave of absence from my job to have my first baby and be totally available to her for the first three months of her life. Now people...
Read MoreSingle Parent Issue
Posted on 3/13/1988
Q. I am a single mother with four children. I have heard it said that the best way a man can love his children is to love their mother. I strongly agree, but my children will never see this...
Read MoreRaising Children the Old Fashioned Way
Posted on 3/29/1987
For most of the first seven years of my life, my mother was a single parent. During this time, she and I lived with my grandmother in a small apartment in what is now the historic district...
Read MoreDiscipline Should be Handled by Both Parents
Posted on 2/15/1987
DON'T MAKE DAD THE HEAVY IN DISCIPLINE "Wait 'til your father gets home." Or so my mother would say whenever my relentlessly obnoxious behavior became too much for her to handle. And it...
Read MoreFathers as Important to Parenting as Mothers
Posted on 1/18/1987
I've been a father for 18 years, so I know a few things about fatherhood. I know, for instance, that fathers are just as important as mothers to the raising of children. I also know fathers don't...
Read MoreMother Guilt in Going Back to Work
Posted on 11/30/1986
BABIES ALSO BENEFIT FROM FATHERS' CARE Q. I'm a schoolteacher who just had her first baby, a girl, in July. Before the baby was born, we decided I would return to work after three months....
Read More5-Year-Old Girl Wants to Live with Dad
Posted on 11/17/1985
5YO CUSTODY Q. My husband and I divorced about a year ago. Our daughter, who is 5, sees her daddy every other weekend, on alternating holidays and for three weeks during the summer. They have...
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