18 year old abusing the privilege of living at home


I'm interested in hearing your recommendations for boundaries for college aged (and beyond) children who live at home? Do we have a curfew? Should they be required to spend time with the family vs spending all of their time with friends? Required to attend church?

My daughter is now 18 and thinks since she is an "adult" she shouldn't have to be in by a certain time. She wants to spend all of her free time away from the home. She is away at college for this semester but will be returning home for the next semester. We want to establish some ground rules/boundaries before she returns home.

Thus far, she is getting decent grades at her college. She does not smoke, drink or use drugs. Yes, she is an overall good kid, but it is stressful when she is at home as we want her in by 1:00 a.m. and she is pushing that rule AND we would like her to spend some time with us in addition to her boyfriend.

Our kids depend on us for their support. Once she gets a job, that money will be used for her social life, with a portion set aside to help pay for her schooling.

Are we being unrealistic in our expectations? or is she?

We also have a 23 year old son who lives at home - he works part-time and pays us rent. He will be returning to school part-time next semester, also.

Thank you.

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