How to take my parenting responsibilities back from an 8 yro.


We have 2 boys, a 2yr and 8 yr old. We struggle a lot with the latter since we can remember.

His defiance, disrespect, angry reactions, moaning and loud crying seem to be at an all time high. He is very impatient, can’t accept a no, messy and has quickly changing emotions; which are often quite extreme, whether he is excited or unhappy. We see no real or sustained effort or desire to get his stuff back.

We ‘kicked him out of the garden’ in December to no avail. Once his last sticker is gone, he ramps it up. He has 8 stickers and has rarely got more than a few ‘stars’ in a row. We have just started a 2hr daily nap until he gets 2 weeks of stars.

He is homeschooled. Academically fine but low effort. We have a curriculum that he can generally manage with low input to avoid further conflict.

Chores means more moans. Its hard to even get him to brush his teeth or wash hands properly. Getting him to do chores for the things he has broken; so many moans is it worth it?
We love him but need some change but don’t know how? Thanks.

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