Second question... We have 2 foster kiddos we're adopting. I have an 11 year old foster daughter who is really an amazing, respectful and happy girl. She really struggles with figuring out who she is and accepting who she is. She will become whoever she is with. She will act and do everything my daughter does and then become who her friend is the next day. We have her in counseling, but I haven't seen any improvement in this area. Any ideas on how we can help her find herself and accept what she is good at and what she is not so gifted in? She loves people, little kids, talking, and artsy things like sewing, drawing etc. We encourage her in these things but she will brush us off and say no I like "insert whatever one of my other daughters is good at or enjoys".