Pre-teen : Conflict with mother about ADHD

Question

My husband and I have been married for 5 years and I have a 13 year old step son and 12 year old daughter that have 'ADHD'. I read your book and believe ADHD to be defined as 'Adults who Don't know How to Discipline'. My husband has always objected to the kids being on drugs, but their mother is emphatic for their use and insists on them despite the side-effects they are causing them. My husband goes to the doctor visits, but the doctor always sides with her. She has the kids ask us questions, like why we don't support them and tell us they have to have the drugs. Their both underweight with BMI's of 15-what do we say to them?

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