3-year-old bedtime battles


My son just turned 3 a month ago. He has never been a good sleeper all 3 years. We are so tired. We usually put him to sleep at 9 PM but he sleeps around 10. We have tried earlier but it never happens. Our bedtime routing includes, brushing, potty, 3 stories and 3-4 songs while one of us is lying with him in bed. When he falls asleep we get up and go to our bed. (He never lets us get out of bed before he falls sleeps and gives the biggest loudest cry in the neighbourhood if we try). In the middle he has been waking 2-3 times asking for us and not sleeping for another 1 hour whispering, moving perhaps trying to sleep. All this moving really makes me mad and I end up shouting at him and sometimes smacking him. Please outline a strategy that I can implement straight away to help my son to sleep better and let us sleep too? Thank you

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