Question
My husband and I are seeking advice concerning our 17 year old son (my step son). My husband and his mom are divorced and my step son goes back and forth staying with us and his mother. However, his mom is custodial parent and my husband is noncustodial, so he technically resides in his moms physical custody but spends a lot of time with us as well. My question concerning our son is that he has for the second time gotten caught by the police drinking. The first time he was at a party and was (getting ready to leave in our vehicle that we let him use) to drive some friends home...Thank God the cops caught him before he made it out of the driveway. The cop didn't ticket him for anything but called my husband and his mom to come pick him up. We took back our vehicle from him for ten weeks and he lost his cell phone for two weeks. The problem with that was that his mom couldn't (and didn't want to as she was accustomed to not have to) get him to and from school. As he doesn't live with us we can't get him to and from school either. My husband travels a lot for our business so couldn't make a commitment to take him either. So it was a tough ten weeks on all of us while our son wasn't driving. Now our son has gotten caught again this last weekend with his friends in our vehicle (his friend was driving as he was the only sober one) drinking in a parking lot. My husband and I take care of him financially with everything. We pay for him to go to a private school, his lunches, vehicle to drive, gas, haircuts, clothes, allowance and child support to his mother. We are at a lost of how to handle this second time around? It's difficult when parents are divorced. Also, his mom doesn't want the burden of being responsible and taking him to school and picking him up in the evening after his practice (he plays sports as well). I want to add in that "No" our son doesn't have a job, so isn't earning/paying for these luxuries. I'm told that it would be to much for him to work since he plays sports year round. I'm ordering Johns book "Teen Proofing"! However, we need advice right now on how to preceded from here...Quick advisement concerning this issue would be greatly appreciated. Thank You!
