"Don't ask a child a question if you don't mean for the child to have a choice in the matter. "

Grandparent raising grandchild


I have finally gotten to a point legally where my daughter, who is the mother of the 5 year old I am raising has no visitation. It's been a long, hard, and expensive process but it is what it is due to her choices. Recently she has begun a "quest" to see her child. She had not made any attempts to rejoin his life since Christmas Day, 2017 until the court finally said She no longer can attempt visitation for various reasons. Now, all of a sudden she is on a mission. I NEVER WANTED FOR HER TO NOT BE IN HIS LIFE, BUT DUE TO HER CHOICES, SHE IS NOT ALLOWED.
I am truly sad for him that he does not have a relationship with her, but he really does not know she is his mother, and she has not acted like one since I had to take custody.
He no longer even asks about "Martha", which he calls her. He sees a counselor monthly now who says there is no need to reintroduce her into his life at this point and time. I am getting a lot of grief from my older daughter trying to force me to bring her sister back into his life. I do not share info from the lawyer or counselor with her at all, as I do not trust her with any information. She agrees that his Mom has failed at parenting but sees it "unfair" to terminate her rights. Yesterday she told me clear out of the blue that I needed to "respond" to his Mom's text and request to talk. I respectfully told her that she needed to butt out! Personally, since my husband died, I honestly believe his Mom thinks there is an inheritance or support to be gained from her child....there is not. Plus, her live in boyfriend, I do not trust at all. He is the kind of person headlines are made of.

Is it WRONG to continue to exclude his Mom given the fact that she herself has not followed court orders and taken the necessary steps to rejoin his life? I don't want to hurt my adult child, but when in doubt, I WILL PROTECT this child.

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