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Husband and Wife Disagree on Allowance Tied to Chores

Question

My husband and I cannot seem to agree on an issue concerning our children. It involves not tying their allowance to their chores. I have read numerous articles of Rosemond's articles/books that discuss his perspective, and I completely agree. After discussing it with my husband many times, he still feels differently. I have two questions:

First, at what point is it more important for me to "give in" on this issue rather than continuing for this to be a sore spot in our relationship? This debate and frustration has been an underlying problem for years, while most other things we usually agree.

Secondly, I recall a very short phrase in one of his books, I believe it was Teen Proofing, where Rosemond said that his children had to clean his office in order to get their allowance. If they failed to do that, then did they still get their allowance? (That is the approach my husband feels we should use. If they do not do their chores on time, they still will have to do them, but they will not get their allowance. )

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