Paying for College?

Question

After graduating from high school we could tell our son was not really ready for college. When looking and applying for schools it was all about the location (New York, Chigaco etc and finding "band members". We debated about having him take a year off but felt he would not get any closer to a decision as to where he wanted to go and what career he might be interested in. Now after attending a college one year he wants to transfer to an out of state school and tells us it is because he wants a smaller Catholic school ( the opposite of why he picked the college he is in, said he wanted diversity and culture) and is afraid if he stays he will regret his college years. We have good reason to believe he will say whatever he thinks we want to hear,to get his way. We do not trust him. He has two friends at the college he wants to transfer to also.
He tells us he will just take out a student loan if we won't pay for the transfer, 20,000 increase per year. We see a pattern with him: when he tires of things he moves on. My son has always been strong willed and does not like to take no for an answer. It is our fault we have trained him to push our buttons and work us til he gets his way.

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