Follow up questions - confidence during potty training


Parent guru question 2:

Thanks for your last response. Our 25-month old daughter is successfully wearing shorts no underwear, and has had 0 accidents at home in 8 days! I have 2 new questions:

First, our daughter often says “poopy” to indicate she has to either pee or poop. But many times she will say “poopy,” then we tell her “go sit on the potty” and then she either doesn’t go sit or she will go sit for a second and say “all done.” We call it the “false alarm,” because we aren’t sure if she felt something and that’s why she alerted us or why she does it (but there are no accidents). Sometimes she does this every 1-2 minutes for a span of 15-20 minutes. Seems like usually after 15-20 minutes of this, she does then successfully have to go poop. Other times she may say this every 5 minutes and after maybe 30 minutes then she has to go pee. Is this normal? Is there a way to teach her to only alert us when she actually has to go?

Second, the daycare is taking our daughter to go sit on a short toilet every 15-20 minutes. The toilet does not have an insert and they said they can’t use one. They don’t have a small potty either and won’t allow us to bring one from home. Therefore the teacher has to take our daughter to the toilet to go. If our daughter was vocally alerting the teacher, like how she alerts us at home, I imagine she wouldn’t have so many accidents. (Except if our daughter did what I described above, I imagine the teacher may get a little frustrated by this behavior?). She only alerted the teacher twice last week but both times were “false alarms.” As a result, last week at the daycare she was about 50-50 for accidents vs. successfully going in the potty. How can the teacher teach my daughter to alert her? (Because of covid, parents aren’t allowed inside, otherwise I would like to tell my daughter “tell your teacher when you need to go potty” every morning when I walk her to her classroom and point to the teacher). It’s hard as the mom to know my daughter is doing so well at home but has many accidents at daycare. I want her to be successful at daycare just like she is at home. I know she doesn’t like making a mess on herself and I don’t understand why she isn’t alerting her teacher like she does at home.

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