3 1/2 Year Old Resentful of Baby Brother

Question

HI there, I need advice on handling a 3.5 year old who gets resentful over the attention her 6.5 month old brother gets from me (I am full time at home with both of them). Also resents that he doesn't get into trouble. She doesn't understand why she can't yell, throw food, refuse to sleep, pee/poo in her bed/pants etc etc when her brother can. She keeps emphasising "But brother can do it cuz he's a baby" She resents him for being able to get away with anything with no scolding from mummy. Sometimes she takes it out on him by deliberately scaring him "Boo!" or talks and sings very loudly at him (I've told her many times not to scare him). She disregards my sternness over it and does it when she feels unhappy with him or me (so it seems). Punishing this behaviour may encourage sibling rivalry. She loved him so much when he first came back from hospital. But she has been acting up, misbehaving more since he was born hence gets into trouble more (increasing her perception of bias). Honestly, it has been much harder to feel loving towards her given the misbehaviour, sleepless nights, the busy days. What do I do to ensure the two of them do not become rivals?

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