"As children grow older, parents must give them greater freedom, including greater freedom to make mistakes. "

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Baby Loves Music!

Posted today

I have a 14 month old who loves to listen to music. During the day, he will use sign language to tell me he wants to listen to music and I will turn Pandora on the TV. There is no music video but...

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PreTeen Lying and Sneaking Food

Posted yesterday

A 12 yr. old female is sneaking food which is not healthy for her as she' s on a gluten, soy, dairy free diet and then lying about it. Lying has also become a problem in itself. She's...

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When a Child Refuses to Go to Their Room

Posted yesterday

A follow up question to using the chart or ticket method. The child loses all their tickets or all the boxes are marked off due to misbehavior and the consequence is to be in their room the rest...

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Perfecting Aim in Potty Training

Posted 2 days ago

My son was potty trained since the time he turned 2, about 3 months ago. He's done well overall but a continuing problem has been that he dribbles on the way to the little potty sometimes and when...

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Toddler Bedtime Bedlam

Posted 2 days ago

My boys ages 3 and 2 have started sharing a bedroom. The older boy was always a good sleeper and would stay in bed when he had his own room. Now however the younger boy who just transitioned from...

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Nearly 3 year old Won't Poop in Potty

Posted 3 days ago

My almost 3 yr old son (bday in a few weeks) is still pooping in his pants. I read and followed Johns potty training book. The thing is he doesn't care about being messy. Poop running down his...

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A grandmother's worries.

Posted 3 days ago

I am a grandmother of 2 wonderful kids- an almost 5 year old and a 21 month old. The problem is his mom and dad are not on the same discipline page. Dad undermines whatever mom says. He gives in...

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Nearly 3 year old Won't Poop in Potty, Follow up

Posted 3 days ago

Re: Nearly 3 year old Won't Poop in Potty Clarifying question. I realize I left a few key pieces of information out of my question which I want to clarify so that the answer will feel more...

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11-yr-old tummy troubles or just seeking attention?

Posted 5 days ago

Our 11 year old daughter began expressing stomach discomfort in early spring (i.e. VERY frequent complaining). In the absence of obvious illness (diarrhea, pain in night w/disrupted sleep, etc..),...

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7 year old trying not to be mean

Posted 1 week ago

What do you suggest to help a 7 year old girl to resist "mean girl" behavior when that's what she's seeing among her peers? Mean girl meaning whispering, sassy talk, exclusion, etc. We encourage...

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Aggression and the Ticket System

Posted 1 week ago

My son will be 4 next month. The 2s and 3s were fairly uneventful for us- nothing beyond your typical discipline issues that were quickly nipped. Several weeks ago, however, he began getting angry...

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22 month old not pooping

Posted 1 week ago

We're on week 3 of potty-training our 22-month-old. I geared up for staying home, ditching the diapers, and being laid-back about it, and it's going fairly well except for bowel movements. He...

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Teenagers, Technology and Life

Posted 1 week ago

With the deluge of technology in children's lives today, once the children reach their teens, including late teens, what would you consider to be fair usage rules in the home for both computers...

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Time for a parent coach.

Posted 1 week ago

Our daughter who is 4.5 is very strong willed and I feel at my wits end knowing how to deal with her. Often I am in tears when my husband comes home in the evening. Recently, i decided I'd had...

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3 yo Acting Like a 3 yo

Posted 1 week ago

Our 3.5 year old son is hitting, kicking and/or spitting combined with an endless amount of talking back when it comes to not getting his way. We've tried timeout, taking things that he loves away...

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Tweens Disrespectful Brats

Posted 1 week ago

It is the first day of summer vacation. I have a 9 and 11 year old boy. I work part time from home. My plan for the summer was to brainstorm a summer bucket list with them and then schedule some...

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Punish the Whole Family?

Posted 1 week ago

My husband and I recently went on a trip for 2.5 weeks and left our almost 5 yr old and almost 3 yr old with our parents. Upon returning we are experiencing some grandparent detox. Aka--horribly...

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A Habit to Break?

Posted 1 week ago

My 7 year old grandson had developed a habit of wiggling his hands when he gets excited, such as during soccer games or while playing or during an exciting part of a movie. I don't think he is...

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Frustrated Grandparents Want a Peaceful Family Dinner

Posted 1 week ago

Our grandchildren, preschool aged, do not eat dinner with their parents, and have not been reared to share a family meal. Consequently, when the family comes to our house for the occasional meal...

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8 Year Old Bucking Confinement

Posted 1 week ago

It's been several weeks with our 8 year old restricted to his room except for meals and early bedtime. He currently has to have 15 consecutive days without hitting or pushing anyone and he seems...

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ADHD Meds and Discipline

Posted 1 week ago

We have a 9yr old son who is on ADHD meds. We tried to take him off his medication with guidance from the doctors and he was an absolute train wreck. He was hitting everyone, cussing, spitting...

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Son Destroys Everything in Room During Punishment

Posted 1 week ago

When we send our son to his bedroom for punishment, he starts to destroy everything in the room. We tried other punishments but nothing seems to phase him. If we take away his limited screen...

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9 Year Old Learning Self-Control?

Posted 1 week ago

I am totally convinced my 9yr old son can learn self control through the methods talked about here. He does relatively well at school and when he is separate from his twin younger siblings (5yr...

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2 Year Old Crib to Bed Transition

Posted 2 weeks ago

My two year old recently transitioned from crib to bed. The freedom seems to be more than he can handle and he has taken to destroying the bedroom he shares with his 3 year old brother. Of course...

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When mean children say mean things.

Posted 2 weeks ago

My 7 year old son has been saying that kids at school say he's fat and that he has "big fat thighs". The truth is he's a bit husky but he's very active, eats a well balanced diet, and is shaped...

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Replace conversation with action.

Posted 2 weeks ago

Hi, my question is about my 13 year old daughter. I am unsure how to discipline and respond to certain types of little acts of disobedience. For example, she knows not to get her one-year-old...

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The Well Behaved Child is Source for Charts

Posted 2 weeks ago

In one of your books, you discuss a discipline method that involves a chart of increasingly 'agonizing' consequences. The child moves from box to box when a targeted behavior is repeated. It's an...

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Skip the Sippy for Bottle to Cup Transition

Posted 2 weeks ago

My almost 2 year old still wants to drink only from a bottle. I've tried several different styles of sippy cups, but she refuses to drink from them. I've tried holding out for a while to insist...

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Separation Anxiety for 3yo

Posted 2 weeks ago

To piggyback on my previous question, I need any advice on how to approach separation problems for my 3 (almost 4) year old son. My husband and I teach his Sunday School class every other week,...

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A blip on her radar?

Posted 2 weeks ago

Hello- Last evening, I caught my 16 year old daughter who came home from a graduation party (with adults present) very intoxicated. She was throwing up in the bathroom w/ 2 girlfriends who were...

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15 y/o Joy Riding

Posted 2 weeks ago

My 15 year old grandson takes family car out at night without permission, of course. Neighborhood policeman has told him the consequences and his parents have as well. They are beside...

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Parent leadership comes first - manners follow.

Posted 2 weeks ago

I have been trying for 10 years to get my kids to use manners. My kids are 6,8,10. I thought of getting jars & whoever uses manners gets a dime or quarter for the day. Do u think this is a good...

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21 month old - Potty Training Continued

Posted 2 weeks ago

In another post, we explained our issue with potty training our 21 month old and received a response which clarified our issue, however we are still confused about how to proceed. In a nutshell,...

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Victimized 5 year old

Posted 2 weeks ago

I have a 5 year old perpetual victim. Example 1: He is needling his 7 year old brother who is complaining about it, and I advise the 7 year old to ignore him. The 5 year old explodes “You think...

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3 y/o Toliet Training Regression

Posted 2 weeks ago

I have two boys, ages 3 and 2. Both were potty trained around the same time a couple months ago. They have started sharing a bedroom since we recently moved and they have a little potty in their...

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Adult children taking sides.

Posted 3 weeks ago

We have 2 adult kids, 23 & 19 and they are being brainwashed & siding with my ex regarding a very critical & legal matter regarding a business/financial agreement for my elderly father of 87. My...

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hitting, kicking, tantrums w/ 3 year old

Posted 3 weeks ago

i just asked you a question regarding my almost 3 year old ( will be 3 in July) - just some more information regarding the tantrums. They are unpredictable so practice runs may not work. I have...

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Separation and Time with Children

Posted 3 weeks ago

My husband is a covert narcissist. After many years of a bad marriage we have "separated". (I cannot divorce him for fear a judge will give him alone time with our children) He is very immature...

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3 1/2 yr old defiance

Posted 3 weeks ago

I have questions about two similar scenarios that are problems for my 3 and a half year old son. The first is that when he's around kids his own age for some sort of a program requiring group...

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Being two is about defiance.

Posted 3 weeks ago

What do you suggest for when a two year old looks you defiantly in the eye and yells "no!"?

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22 mo Night Training

Posted 3 weeks ago

Our son is 22 months old and is doing pretty well with getting to the potty during the day when he needs to, but he has yet to poop in the potty. He's had two accidents on the floor when he was...

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Preschooler Acting Up at Daycare

Posted 4 weeks ago

Our 4 1/2 year old daughter paid me a compliment last night: "You are the meanest mommy I've ever seen!" This came after dispassionately informing her that she had lost all of her tickets...

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Losing Grandpa

Posted 4 weeks ago

It is difficult to type this but I find myself in a situation I have never had to face. My husband and I have been parents to out Grandchild since his mom left about 20 months ago. During her...

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19 yo Narcissist Revisited

Posted 4 weeks ago

We need more help in dealing with the daughter that I have asked questions about in the past. She is continuing her pattern of bitterness. She made no contact with me on a recent birthday and no...

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20 mo Potty Training in Public

Posted on 5/22/2017

My 20 month old daughter is 8 days into potty training. She is doing a great job going on the potty when I am around. However, when I take her places like church or the gym she seems to be having...

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New baby=tantrums for Big Sister!

Posted on 5/22/2017

We just brought the new baby home and it's full-blown, almost constant tantrums from our 30-month old. We used our 'tantrum place', but her tantrums are 15-20 minute, full-on bloodcurdling scream...

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The "what if's" will make you crazy!

Posted on 5/22/2017

We are so happy to report that within about three weeks our guy was fully toilet trained using the N/$75 method. There is one thing that we are afraid of... what do we do if he has diarrhea? My...

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Entertaining mom can choose a different path.

Posted on 5/22/2017

For the last seven years, I have been in the mode of entertaining my kids. I have spent my time creating activities, planning playdates and going to events. I enjoyed it and I thought I was...

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What to do about testing?

Posted on 5/21/2017

((This question is in response to a previous question which was not helpful to us. Hopefully the additional information that we've provided will help you to better understand.)) > Our 8 year old...

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Angry Outbursts from a 3-year-old

Posted on 5/21/2017

Every time I tell my 3 1/2 year old to do something (ex: put your cup up on the table more instead of on the edge, don't jump around in the kitchen, etc.) she crosses her arms and grunts. Or she...

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