"A father's contribution to his children is primarily a measure of how much he adores their mother. "

The Social Life of a 6 Year Old

Question

I'm getting a complex and feeling like I must be a really mean parent. Perhaps I am. Could you please let me know if I have done the right thing? My daughter who is six has been invited to another birthday party. Here the trend is to invite at least all the girls in the class/grade. My daughter has been behaving of late at the level of 50% of the time reasonably well behaved and 50% of the time whining, demanding, entitled, sloppy with homework, piano and chores, sometimes stomping her feet and yelling if I am trying to brush the knots out of her hair etc. When we received the latest invitation to a party I said she had to show me for a week that her behaviour was worthy of the event. She continued on the same path - maybe reaching a 60% good behaviour level. After sending the RSVP to the parent to say my daughter could go, her behaviour made a turn for the worse. After five days of unacceptable behaviour and a few warnings that if it continued I would change my mind about the party - I did in fact let the parent know this afternoon that my daughter would not be attending the party anymore due to her behaviour. We are still fairly new to this area and don't know people well. Have I ruined my daughter's social life and been really bad for changing the RSVP a week before the event? My husband agrees something had to be done - but has also pointed out that I have effectively punished the girl who is having the party as well by not letting our daughter go.

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