What to do with a 21 year old step son who has never been made to take responsibility for himself or his actions? Every time he has made a mistake, his mom has covered for him, lied for him and bailed him out. He has been given an endless number of gifts, cash, cars, cameras none of which he has ever earned. We have always been the "bad guys" because we had rules and he had responsibilities when he was with us.Now, he is back (in his own apartme) drinking heavily and doing drugs. He thinks that it's ok because he's legal age to drink and the drugs are ok because they are just "recreational"! My husband and I have discussed this with him and as usual he thinks we are being too harsh.