10 & 12 year old brothers, "highly sensitive" and "strong willed"

Question

I am on board with all the traditional discipline "like grandma did it." We have 5 children ranging in age now 24 down to 10. The 10-year-old son has all the signs of being what I understand to be "a Highly Sensitive Child." He is very smart. But issues with social cues and anger against himself etc. He is observed to be on the spectrum but highly functioning, but not officially diagnosed. He also has a brother (12 years old) who is incredibly strong-willed, athletically successful and dominate, and of course always wants his way--which he gets from his younger brother. Do you believe in the idea of "highly sensitive child?" And do you have any recommendations on how to handle his negative, outrageous feelings toward himself? And he also rarely takes responsibility for his actions (like I put my shoes in my closet and someone else took them, I did not pee on the toilet seat, maybe Daddy did it, why are you blaming me?"

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