Question
My daughters boyfriend is the youngest child in his family. He is 19 and working a full time job and is a 2nd degree blackbelt and is involved in his dojo. Since he has been dating my daughter I got to watch him grow up into a nice man. The problem is his parents. They gave him a choice of 1 college he could go to. He went 1 year and figured out it was not for him. He had saved up money to buy a friends car, and they would not let him buy it... he is expected to buy his moms car when she get a new one and they dont want to put him on their insurance as a driver.. and he is one of the safest drivers I know. His older brother and sister toes the line, and still live at home, but he wants to be able to make his own decisions about life with out causing a rift between his parents that can’t be fixed. My daughter pushes him to stand up to the parents as he is legally an adult and wants some control over his life. Financially he cant move out yet and he would not have a place to go if they threw him out. He is a good boy, always respectful, never got in any trouble, they did a great job raising him..... why can’t they trust they did it right and let him start living his life. I do agree to the moms religious views that they shouldn’t sleep together until marriage, but since that ship has sailed I am ok with it as I know my daughter is on birth control. Plus I know times have changed in those regards. Is there anyway that he may be able to get his parents to loosen up and let him spend time with her on her campus and to understand that he has not committed to a career yet and does not want to waste money on college when he does not know what major he wants.The job he has now he is the manager of a KFC and is starting at a salary of 48,000 - 52,000 per year, which in our area is great.
Usually it is the other way around, the parents want the child to grow up and be able to move out on their own, but in this case they thwart all his efforts to become a responsible adult who can make it on his own.
Any advice for him?
